[Anonymous]

i can relate. i used to hang out with my friends a lot but as the years when on i felt less and less excited to hang out with them. not because they were bad or mean people it just felt like it was too much pressure to be around them with all tlhe questions and asking me where my girlfriend was. i didn't want to lie but i also did not want to tell the truth. so i avoided them. i really didn't have any gay friends so basically i started to isolate myself. i felt i was too straight for the gays and not straight enough for the straights. also the things and places i used to go with them no longer interested me because they were places to "meet people" but they were always straight and the purpose was meeting opposite sex. at first it was fun in my new city because i didn't know anyone so it was fun to meet new friends. but after a while i got tired of meeting "friends" and wanted someone that i could date too. i wish i had more advice and i know others will say "come out, you will feel better". all i can say is isolation is not good. maybe u can start a new fresh friend group based on people and activities that may be more conducive to your gay identity. maybe find "gay friendly" groups that you can meet new opeople without havin to specificaly say you are gay. once you are ready you can come out but until then maybe meeting people in friendly groups may be a good options to help you as you transition.