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Old 8th Jan 2017, 10:58 AM   #1
baristajedi
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Gender: Genderqueer (transmasculine)
Orientation: Gay
Out Status: Fully out!
Location: Edinburgh
Age: 38
Posts: 1,980
Join Date: Sep 2015


I want to break free

I've said it in other threads, things are getting better, the contexts in which I am closeted and putting on the straight performsnce, hiding part of who I am/part of my life; those situations are getting fewer.

But they still take up most of my daily life. Even though I'm coming out in every situation I can, there are still those where I have to wait. And that closeted, repressed feeling leaves me feeling exhausted, tense, and like something's eating at me, hurting something deep inside.

How do you get through those days? Between those times, i seem to get out my feelings by escaping away from my soon to be ex and daughter and drowning myself in music and journaling, sometimes having a drink or a few, getting out to the LGBT meetups...

But I feel like I'm just going to crack sometimes through those days. Does anyone have similar experiences or feelings? What's are your strategies? How do you get through these times?
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My heterosexuality is a lie; there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The Force shall free me.
- variation of the Sith Code inspired by SiennaFire
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