Paranoid: I feel like people are staring at me

[Anonymous]

Hey,
Lately I've been really insecure about myself. I think I always have been and I'm not sure why, but it's gotten bad lately. Whenever I'm in school walking up and down the hallways I feel like people are staring at me or some people glance at me and I don't know I just feel like terrible. I feel so bad when this happens because it seems like they are looking at me cause they think im like ugly or something, i'm not sure. It's just really messing my social life up because I try and get ready and look perfect in the morning because I don't want to feel like people are looking at me or talking about me. Sometimes I'll like be in a classroom or out eating lunch and I'll feel like people are talking about me in a group or something. Ohh ya and another thing is, today someone told me I look exactly like this person at my school and like, I don't like that person because he is not attractive at all, and when I compare myself to him in the mirror, I don't feel like I look like him at all, and the guy that told me with was 100% serious. I can see how he thinks I look like him because we're both really skinny. But I always feel like people look at me, and then I try and think to myself why they are looking at me, and I always come to the conclusion that they think i'm like ugly and weird or something. Its so annoying and the anxiety is like killing me. It's not even funny how insecure I feel at school. Does anyone know why I feel this way and like, what's going on? any advice is definately accept!

[Blaz]

Don't worry man, I used to feel exactly the same way. I was always worrying about the way I walked, how I dressed, what I looked like, etc., and I always thought people were constantly talking/judging me. I still do to a small extent, but nearly everyone has that tiny bit of self-consciousness.

In the end, you can't worry about what people think, because most of the time they think nothing at all. Those that do have their own issues and self-deceptions that for some reason there are above you so they must judge, and a lot of them are idiots, but not everyone is like that. Don't be afraid to be who you are, and don't be afraid to make a fool of yourself from time to time, because when you can laugh and learn from your mistakes and bad times, you've reached a level higher than those that judge you.

lol, people have compared me to Bill Clinton and I have Pics if you want to look. . .I don't really think I do, and many(most) people don't think I do either.

When you walk past people that seem to be pointing and laughing, just know that they haven't reached the same level of acceptance and tolerance as you have, I know it may be hard, but it's patience that brings out the best in people.

Don't be afraid, for when all is said and done, it is the one whose head is held up high, whose eyes are wide open, and who's arm is outstretched that inevitably makes all the difference.

Don't let people make you feel like your anything less than what you truly are. Just because they make you FEEL that way, doesn't mean you ARE.

You are a unique individual who has a critical role to play in this puzzle we call the human race.

[Andrew]

This is exactly how I feel to. Walking down the hallways :X

-Luis

[Lexington]

I've got good news and bad news for you.

The good news is - nobody's staring at you.
The bad news is - nobody's staring at you.

Your feelings aren't just "normal" - they're standard. More than 95% of students your age are feeling this. That everyone's staring, thinking that they're ugly, too fat, too skinny, clumsy, conceited, whatever. But think about that for a minute. If more than 95% of students are feeling that way, they're too wrapped up in what other people are thinking about them that they don't have any time or energy to look at (and down at) other students. Instead, when they're looking at you for more than a brief glance, they're almost certainly not thinking something mean about you. They're just noticing that YOU are looking at THEM. And they're thinking YOU're thinking that THEY're ugly, too fat, too skinny... See how this builds on itself?

How do you stop the feeling? It's tough. You'll have to start looking at other students as something other than distinct from you. It's very easy to feel isolated, like the only loser in a school full of winners, but trust me - the insecure students FAR outnumber the "cool" ones. Just picture all of them thinking precisely the same thing about you, and see if that helps any.

Lex

I feel like this too...all the time. The last two years they had "reason", but this year...if the staring continues I am not going to like it (probably have a panic attack right there in the hall honestly). One year i walked seriously weird because my feet were all twisted, then the next year a wheelchair was their reason for watching me (had my feet all fixed up and was in a cast)...now I walk pretty normal, and with my extreme social anxiety and paranoia...I DEFINITELY feel your pain. I'm always told that if you're being stared at to flat out ask what the hell their problem with you is...maybe you could try that (I'm still too afraid 90% of the time to do it), but it'll give you a reason why they're staring.

[Anonymous]

I'm in great shape, have done sports my whole life, I'm at the prime of my youth. People I've dated have always commented on how good looking I am.

I myself know people look at me. Because I'm tall and dress very fashionably. The thing is when you get out of high school people start to look at you more. I'd say either because they grew out of the insecurity phase like many high school students or they may pass you by.

Seriously the only advice is. Live your life, who cares if people are looking at you. Or saying stuff about you. There are much worse things in life happening. And seriously beat the insecurities in life. I developed a tough attitude, and when people have said things about me.

I would walk past them and give them an. Elitist, condesending, holier then though, I'm better then you look. Because people who dis-respect me, don't get respect from me at all. Remember don't waste your love on ingrates

[Malchik89]

Originally Posted by Lexington

I've got good news and bad news for you.

The good news is - nobody's staring at you.
The bad news is - nobody's staring at you.

Your feelings aren't just "normal" - they're standard. More than 95% of students your age are feeling this. That everyone's staring, thinking that they're ugly, too fat, too skinny, clumsy, conceited, whatever. But think about that for a minute. If more than 95% of students are feeling that way, they're too wrapped up in what other people are thinking about them that they don't have any time or energy to look at (and down at) other students. Instead, when they're looking at you for more than a brief glance, they're almost certainly not thinking something mean about you. They're just noticing that YOU are looking at THEM. And they're thinking YOU're thinking that THEY're ugly, too fat, too skinny... See how this builds on itself?

How do you stop the feeling? It's tough. You'll have to start looking at other students as something other than distinct from you. It's very easy to feel isolated, like the only loser in a school full of winners, but trust me - the insecure students FAR outnumber the "cool" ones. Just picture all of them thinking precisely the same thing about you, and see if that helps any.

Lex

Lex is right, this is all just a really confusing and intricate process known as "growing up" ^^ you'll get through it, we all do

[Anonymous]

thanks guys. It's just been really hard because whenever i look in the mirror im like obssessed with the way i look and i like the way i look. i get compliments and like girls like me and its just all like really cool. but when im at home i feel like this and i notice that im not like weird or w/e, its just when i go back to school i get this really bad feeling like theres something I can't see about myself. Like, I don't notice something about me that everyone else notices. Its really hard to explain but it really make me like depressed sorta in a way, and I get like mahor anxiety. But I'll use the tips you guys gave me. Thanks again!

[Jim1454]

I look at people too - so that I don't bump into them! I'm sure it's nothing more than that.

[Anonymous]

Hi!

I feel the same way all the time. I'm really insecure about my looks and personality as I admit to being a bit weird. As my signature says be who you are! The ones who matter in your life are the ones that are true, real friends!

[Smiley1123]

Hi!

I feel the same way all the time. I'm really insecure about my looks and personality as I admit to being a bit weird. As my signature says be who you are! The ones who matter in your life are the ones that are true, real friends!