Homosexuality & Sexual Abuse

[Anonymous]

Whats your views on sexual abuse causing\contributing to homosexuality?
So i know this is a touchy subject i don't wish to upset anyone I'm just looking for some answers.

Now while i haven't been sexually abused exactly (well i don't see it that way & maybe that's because i don't want to) i had sex (& by sex i mean everything) with a guy at a very young age around 8 or 9 but i really don't remember much & he was older by about 3-5 years I'm not sure that's right either but anyways i cant recall how it all happened and yeah I'm just confused as to if i was gay before and that's why it happened or if it may have caused a change in me.

oh and I'm male btw.

[Anonymous]

I am female and was sexually abused from the age of 12. I don't believe that this was in anyway linked to my sexuality, just an unfortunate incident. I don't have a dislike, or a fear of men, just one man, and thats it. I really don't think that what happened to me influenced my sexuality.

[Lexington]

I don't know if abuse can make one a homosexual, but it can make one practice homosexuality, if that makes any sense.

Some people don't like candy. They just don't. Never did like it. So they just don't eat it. But say there's somebody who had unbelieveably strict parents. And every time they had something sweet, they got whipped like crazy. As time went on, they'd develop an aversion to anything sweet because of that. These people aren't so much "sweet skippers" the same way the first group is. One is like that naturally, and the other is forced into it. And, I'd like to think, if the person really is interested in eating candy, with some psychiatric help, they might eat candy again. But the first group? No reason to go that route.

If you practice homosexuality because you're scared of women, or because you had some homosexual experiences early on, and NOT because you actually enjoy the whole thing, then yeah - I'd say there's something going on there. But if you dig guys, and don't have any problem digging guys, then whatever came before doesn't matter.

Lex

[Anonymous]

I don't see how being abused by a man would lower sexual attraction to women.

[Anonymous]

Originally Posted by Lexington

And, I'd like to think, if the person really is interested in eating candy, with some psychiatric help, they might eat candy again. But the first group? No reason to go that route.

Made me giggle

Originally Posted by Lexington

If you practice homosexuality because you're scared of women, or because you had some homosexual experiences early on, and NOT because you actually enjoy the whole thing, then yeah - I'd say there's something going on there. But if you dig guys, and don't have any problem digging guys, then whatever came before doesn't matter.

Well Sometimes i find myself attracted to guys but most of the time i don't feel anything about anything. i have a lot of issues atm. i just dont know if what im feeling is true and i dont want to be attracted to guys but i dunno im just very confused.

Originally Posted by Anonymous

I don't see how being abused by a man would lower sexual attraction to women.

Sometimes things can become the only thing you know. physical abuse victims keep on going back to the abuser and go on to more abusive relationships because its all they know to be right and its familiar... i was going to continue lex's very amusing candy analogy but im soo not in the mood

[Anonymous]

I personally was never abused. And I'm still a virgin

[Anonymous]

Even if sexual abuse did make you afraid of the opposite sex, it couldn't make you attracted to the same sex.

And I don't believe that being abused by someone of the same sex or early homosexual experiences make you gay either - I think that you would need to have a look at the prevelance of childhood homosexual experiences amongst straight people to realise this properly.

I don't doubt that childhood sexual abuse can affect you greatly and affect your relationships, but I don't think it can "make" you gay. Or at least, this is my opinion.

I personally experienced early sexual abuse by a member of the opposite sex, and am bisexual. But I don't see the two as connected at all.

[Wander]

My thoughts on all this...

-Being sexually abused as a child by a member of the same sex will not cause the child to grow up to be homosexual
-Being homosexual does not make one more likely to sexually abuse children
-People who are already set on abusing children, no matter their orientation, are capable of abusing children of the same sex, often because of the sense of power and control it gives them

[Anonymous]

Originally Posted by Wander

-Being homosexual does not make one more likely to sexually abuse children
-People who are already set on abusing children, no matter their orientation, are capable of abusing children of the same sex, often because of the sense of power and control it gives them

I totally agree and am firm with my beliefs on that but its just the other stuff where I'm not so sure.

[Anonymous]

its not connected at all..
im female - and i was raped when i was 16. and i was abused when i was alot younger.

ive always been scared of guys - well, not scared, but never trusted guys..
that doesnt make me sexually attracted to women.

im attracted to women because thats the way i feel.
things in my past have just made me be able to accept it better.

[Anonymous]

I have been abused as a child by my mum and my brother, and at various stages in life by other men. I have been in a serious relationship with a man a woman. I now consider myself to be lesbian. I don't think it has anything to do with what happened in my past.
I just love being with women

[Jim1454]

I have no history of abuse, yet I'm pretty sure I'm gay. So I don't think it has anything to do with it. Not in my case anyway.

As Lex puts it, I'm one of those that doesn't like candy (although that couldn't be farther from the TRUTH!!! )

[Anonymous]

I was sexually assaulted three years ago. But I already knew I was gay before that - so definitely didn't change anything. Despite what was done, while I am fearful at times of being alone with a man bigger than I am, I'm still attracted to men anyway. A beautiful guy is a beautiful guy, and ain't nothing gonna make me not wanna tap that

With all that said though. It seems clearly that homosexuality is a combination of both genetic and environmental factors. Perhaps sexual abuse does play some role in that environment. Maybe it can turn people away or towards a certain sexuality. However, as is clear in this thread, I believe that drawing conclusions on this would be exceedingly difficult.

[Psychedelic Bookmarks]

Some people say that all lesbians have just had a bad/violent experience and hate men, but I've never been abused. I just feel so terrible for people who have been, and I wouldn't dare to suggest how/whether their sexuality has been influenced by that.

[Vampyrecat]

My sexuality has had nothing to do with my sexual assault.

I was already well on the way to acceptance when it happened.

That's all I can say.

[Nixon]

no abuse still likely gay ( still a little on the edge)