severely depressed girlfriend... how to help? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

Anonymous · 13th Jan 2012, 05:35 PM

So, I knew that my girlfriend was going through tough times, and that she was depressed. However, today I learned that she has been cutting herself on a semi-regular basis, and has tried to commit suicide 4 times scince middle school (shes 17 now). She is in counseling for it, and hasn't tried suicide in at least a year, although she is still cutting (thats how I figured it out). I am just nervous and a little scared about the situation, and I really want to be of all possible help to her, but I don't quite know how, or if doing something is even in her best intrest. Advice?

silverhalo · 14th Jan 2012, 02:55 AM

Its great that you want to be there for her, but you must make sure you dont become completely submerged in it, you can be there for her but you are not a trained proffessional so there is only so much you can do. I think the best thing you can do it be there for her and at the same time encourage her to get as much proffessional help as possible as that is what will help her most in the long run.

Hana Solo · 14th Jan 2012, 04:15 PM

Make sure she knows you're there for her. That's the best I can say. That way if she needs someone she knows she can go to you. Ask her how you can help her.

In my experience with depression, just knowing that someone is there can help.

**Lexington** · 14th Jan 2012, 04:35 PM

The above two have said the most important stuff. Be there. Lend an open ear. It's sometimes best to simply be the open ear. You don't have to try to cheer her up if she's not in the mood for it, or try to solve her problems for her. Just let her vent to you - that's probably what she needs most of all.

Lex

Anonymous · 14th Jan 2012, 05:05 PM

(OP)

Thanks for the help, guys. It is really greatly appreciated.

13th Jan 2012, 05:35 PM	#1
Anonymous Posting Anonymously Posts: 34,191 Join Date: Dec 2007	severely depressed girlfriend... how to help? So, I knew that my girlfriend was going through tough times, and that she was depressed. However, today I learned that she has been cutting herself on a semi-regular basis, and has tried to commit suicide 4 times scince middle school (shes 17 now). She is in counseling for it, and hasn't tried suicide in at least a year, although she is still cutting (thats how I figured it out). I am just nervous and a little scared about the situation, and I really want to be of all possible help to her, but I don't quite know how, or if doing something is even in her best intrest. Advice?

14th Jan 2012, 02:55 AM	#2
silverhalo EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Quite a few Location: England, Age: 29 Posts: 3,129 Join Date: Dec 2008	Re: severely depressed girlfriend... how to help? Its great that you want to be there for her, but you must make sure you dont become completely submerged in it, you can be there for her but you are not a trained proffessional so there is only so much you can do. I think the best thing you can do it be there for her and at the same time encourage her to get as much proffessional help as possible as that is what will help her most in the long run.

14th Jan 2012, 04:15 PM	#3
Hana Solo EC's Dear Abby- talk to me! Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Mostly into girls Out Status: Closet is getting a little crowded Location: Not even a dot on the Australian map Age: 17 Posts: 1,089 Join Date: Nov 2011	Re: severely depressed girlfriend... how to help? Make sure she knows you're there for her. That's the best I can say. That way if she needs someone she knows she can go to you. Ask her how you can help her. In my experience with depression, just knowing that someone is there can help. __________________ Thor: No matter what he's done, Loki is from Asgard and is my brother Black Widow: He killed 80 people in two days. Thor: ...adopted. ~The Avengers, 2012

14th Jan 2012, 04:35 PM	#4
Lexington The gay gargoyle EC Advisor Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Colorado Age: 42 Posts: 12,360 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: severely depressed girlfriend... how to help? The above two have said the most important stuff. Be there. Lend an open ear. It's sometimes best to simply be the open ear. You don't have to try to cheer her up if she's not in the mood for it, or try to solve her problems for her. Just let her vent to you - that's probably what she needs most of all. Lex

14th Jan 2012, 05:05 PM	#5
Anonymous Posting Anonymously Posts: 34,191 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: severely depressed girlfriend... how to help? (OP) Thanks for the help, guys. It is really greatly appreciated.

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