in love with my best friend

[Anonymous]

thankfully, things at school have calmed down quite a bit.
its actually been a great learning experience, as i now know who my real friends are.
but, as things tend to go for me, one problem solved, another risen.
im in love with my best friend.
as i said earlier, i go to a jewish school to which gay people are somewhat foreign. i came out to my closest friend at school pretty early on in the year, and she was totally indifferent to it. after that conversation we never talked about it again.
since then, ive developed feelings for her.
strong feelings.
though she seems not to care about my sexuality, im beginning to think that maybe her apparent indifference is really uncomfort.
her family is religious and im not at all sure how they feel about homosexuality.
though, as i said, my friend and i dont talk about it, i suspect that she might be curious herself.
that being said, a relationship is totally out of the question, even in my dreams, considering the total alienation that ive had to deal with for the past few weeks.
my greatest concern is how to act.
ive sort of forgotten what normal is.
though i dont get flustered around her, i am overly generous and i worry that anyone paying attention would be about to figure it out.
im sure that you all have been through crushes on friends and i was wondering how you dealt with it.

[JohnnyBoy]

For a loooong time before I came out, I had a gigantic crush on my best friend and roommate. When I came out, we were no longer living together for no particular reason but still best friends. When I told him I was gay, he had a ton of questions and one was if I ever liked him. I was straight up with him and told him yes. He didn't talk to me for a few months even though I had gotten rid of those feelings.

It took me realize that I was gay, he was straight, and that it would never happen. It took a while but I got over it, and now our friendship is totally back to normal and still in my group of friends (and he thinks my boyfriend is really cool )