how comes the guys i like don't seem attracted to me and people i dont like are????

[Anonymous]

this is a question i have asked myself a lot of times. i am a guy. i can attract people attractive women, but it seems like the men i am attracted to are not attracted to me or do not show it and the guys that i am not attracted to seem to show the most interest but i am not into them. it has made me feel like "wow, maybe i am not really that attractive or i must be ugly and the guys that are interested in me are the best i can get". it never made sense to me because i can get very beautiful women if i wanted to.

here's what i have figured out: it's not that attractive guys are not attracted to me but i also am not out so the attractive guys i have been attracted to are either straight or they are bi/gay but also are in the closet. and when you are in the closet and you are not at a gay labeled event, you are not going to "out yourself" no matter how attracted you are to another guy. i think this is what is happening because i get gay vibes from "straight acting men" and when i try and open the door for them to come through, they never walk through but they always seem very flirtatious with me, smily, small talk, etc. of course my gaydar can be off but i do not think it is off 100 percent of the time.

as a guy that likes guys and i guy that lives in straight world, i realize that there are some things that straight guys just dont do with other guys because they do not want to seem gay and when people cross this line it makes me question. anyway, i have heard several guys that are straight appearing and masculine but actually like guys tell me this time and time again...."even if i am into a guy, i will not let on that i am if others are around or if it is in a non-gay place." these men are also closeted too.

so i say all of this to try and help others that feel like "how come noone is attracted to me". it doesn't mean they are not, it just means that you are probably focused on closeted or confused guys that can't deal with the same sex attraction and the most they can do is just stare and shift their eyes but they can't and are may not at a place to actually approach you or respond to your approach in a way you may want them too.