Checking people out while in a relationship - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

JohnnyBoy · 24th Jan 2012, 05:11 PM

I can't help it when I see a hot guy and undress him with my eyes...I love my boyfriend, and have no desire to do anything with these guys, but I can't help it sometimes...

Anyone else do it? Do you feel guilty?

Anonymous · 24th Jan 2012, 05:23 PM

Not in a relationship, so can't really say. But I think you can chill. Hot guys naturally attract eyes. Don't worry about it. But I dunno... does your boyfriend have a sexy body? Maybe you're visualizing what you're (or he's) lacking.

JohnnyBoy · 24th Jan 2012, 05:28 PM

No, his body is freaking slammin', don't want anything more or less than his body...maybe I'm looking at what I'm lacking.

J Snow · 24th Jan 2012, 05:29 PM

I don't think its anything to be concerned about. Everyone faces temptation. Being in a relationship is about controlling yourself to resist that temptation to be with someone else. I think ridding yourself of any and all temptation is impossible.

toremi · 24th Jan 2012, 05:36 PM

Totally normal.

When I was your age I was in a LT committed relationship with a girl from high school. I did it back then all the time to other girls. It's only natural to look at what we are attracted to. We do it with everything in life, you are suppose to notice works of art.

Main thing is you appreciate yours and don't trade it in for something else... it may look tempting or better but it isn't always the case.

Anonymous · 24th Jan 2012, 05:45 PM

I see no problem as long as you aren't cheating in any way shape or form. Looking is completely okay. I know some couples that admire celebrities together and 'ooh' at their hotness haha.

Charni · 24th Jan 2012, 06:03 PM

Me and my girlfriend are okay with each other looking at nice girls. In fact we will tell the other if one of us sees one who looks nice. But we are still a very strict closed relationship. Communication helps a lot in relationships.

Anonymous · 24th Jan 2012, 07:38 PM

I don't think it matters were you get your appetite from as long as you eat all of your meals at home.

Anonymous · 24th Jan 2012, 08:08 PM

I personally would be a bit concerned if I had a partner that didn't find anyone else attractive.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anonymous

I don't think it matters were you get your appetite from as long as you eat all of your meals at home.

Hah!

**TheEdend** · 24th Jan 2012, 09:36 PM

I think its completely normal to check out other people while in a relationship. Checking out someone doesn't mean that you are going to cheat on someone or that your boyfriend is lacking something else. Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean that everyone else becomes ugly.

I personally don't have a problem with it. Actually, my boyfriend and I check out guys together and it can be fun in its own way.

Anonymous · 26th Jan 2012, 12:18 PM

Don't worry, I think you're good.
I'm an asshole and check out other girls right in front of my girlfriend and even flirt sometimes. But the mistake I made was pointing them out to her too...bad idea lol

BUT

I do not want any other girls. She's perfect and I only really have a heart for her, but it doesn't hurt to stare.
I mean, I check her out too! lol

24th Jan 2012, 05:11 PM	#1
JohnnyBoy I like tuhtles Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: St Louis Age: 22 Posts: 165 Join Date: Jan 2012	Checking people out while in a relationship I can't help it when I see a hot guy and undress him with my eyes...I love my boyfriend, and have no desire to do anything with these guys, but I can't help it sometimes... Anyone else do it? Do you feel guilty?

24th Jan 2012, 05:23 PM	#2
Anonymous Posting Anonymously Posts: 34,191 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship Not in a relationship, so can't really say. But I think you can chill. Hot guys naturally attract eyes. Don't worry about it. But I dunno... does your boyfriend have a sexy body? Maybe you're visualizing what you're (or he's) lacking.

24th Jan 2012, 05:28 PM	#3
JohnnyBoy I like tuhtles Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: St Louis Age: 22 Posts: 165 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship No, his body is freaking slammin', don't want anything more or less than his body...maybe I'm looking at what I'm lacking.

24th Jan 2012, 05:29 PM	#4
J Snow EC Addict Regular Member Gender: Sex - Male, Gender -Female/bigender/not quite sure Orientation: Primarily interested in men. Out Status: fairly out about sexuality, gender not so much Location: Des Moines, Iowa Age: 22 Posts: 1,380 Join Date: Aug 2011	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship I don't think its anything to be concerned about. Everyone faces temptation. Being in a relationship is about controlling yourself to resist that temptation to be with someone else. I think ridding yourself of any and all temptation is impossible. __________________ "You don't need to hide my friend, for I am just like you."

24th Jan 2012, 05:36 PM	#5
toremi Resident Ginger Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Bi-something, I'm not sure Out Status: like 2 ppl who know i am confused Location: Toronto Posts: 122 Join Date: Jan 2012	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship Totally normal. When I was your age I was in a LT committed relationship with a girl from high school. I did it back then all the time to other girls. It's only natural to look at what we are attracted to. We do it with everything in life, you are suppose to notice works of art. Main thing is you appreciate yours and don't trade it in for something else... it may look tempting or better but it isn't always the case.

24th Jan 2012, 05:45 PM	#6
Anonymous Posting Anonymously Posts: 34,191 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship I see no problem as long as you aren't cheating in any way shape or form. Looking is completely okay. I know some couples that admire celebrities together and 'ooh' at their hotness haha.

24th Jan 2012, 06:03 PM	#7
Charni EC's part-time Guru in training Full Member Gender: Physically male, mentally everything but male. Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: My girlfriend and 8 others Location: Australia! Age: 16 Posts: 774 Join Date: Nov 2011	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship Me and my girlfriend are okay with each other looking at nice girls. In fact we will tell the other if one of us sees one who looks nice. But we are still a very strict closed relationship. Communication helps a lot in relationships. __________________ And on an unrelated note you should join the dark side.

24th Jan 2012, 07:38 PM	#8
Anonymous Posting Anonymously Posts: 34,191 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship I don't think it matters were you get your appetite from as long as you eat all of your meals at home.

24th Jan 2012, 09:36 PM	#10
TheEdend Hope will never be silent EC Moderator Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Extended family still doesn't know Location: Orlando, Florida Age: 21 Posts: 2,822 Join Date: Mar 2010	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship I think its completely normal to check out other people while in a relationship. Checking out someone doesn't mean that you are going to cheat on someone or that your boyfriend is lacking something else. Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean that everyone else becomes ugly. I personally don't have a problem with it. Actually, my boyfriend and I check out guys together and it can be fun in its own way. __________________ “You may never know what results come of your action, but if you do nothing there will be no result” -Gandhi

26th Jan 2012, 12:18 PM	#11
Anonymous Posting Anonymously Posts: 34,191 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: Checking people out while in a relationship Don't worry, I think you're good. I'm an asshole and check out other girls right in front of my girlfriend and even flirt sometimes. But the mistake I made was pointing them out to her too...bad idea lol BUT I do not want any other girls. She's perfect and I only really have a heart for her, but it doesn't hurt to stare. I mean, I check her out too! lol

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