Stereotypes

[Anonymous]

This is going to sound like a dumb question, but please bare with me. I recently told a close friend of mine that I was a lesbian, and she was surprised. She said I was too girlie and feminine to be a lesbian and I should think it over again. Although I was very irratated at her comment, she had me thinking. Do all lesbians have to be masculine and tough? Can a lesbian act just like a straight women, but just like other women?

[Anonymous]

Originally Posted by Anonymous

This is going to sound like a dumb question, but please bare with me. I recently told a close friend of mine that I was a lesbian, and she was surprised. She said I was too girlie and feminine to be a lesbian and I should think it over again. Although I was very irratated at her comment, she had me thinking. Do all lesbians have to be masculine and tough? Can a lesbian act just like a straight women, but just like other women?

Honey, I am a lesbian and I am not very feminine or masculine. Some of the women I have dated were very masculine and some very feminine...All of them were lesbians believe me. Most of the women I know who are lesbians are very feminine and I would have never thought they weren't straight had they never told me otherwise. A stereotype is just that a stereotype, some people fit them others break them.

[Anonymous]

^This was me: Forgot one thing...That was not a dumb question at all.

[peanutbutter]

Originally Posted by Anonymous

This is going to sound like a dumb question, but please bare with me. I recently told a close friend of mine that I was a lesbian, and she was surprised. She said I was too girlie and feminine to be a lesbian and I should think it over again. Although I was very irratated at her comment, she had me thinking. Do all lesbians have to be masculine and tough? Can a lesbian act just like a straight women, but just like other women?

I had this same concern during my winter break. I thought I looked very gay. I thought that you were either butch or girly and that I had to fit into either. I dated a girl and she was extremely girly. Shoes, dresses, earrings, nails and make-up. Her handbags matched everything some cost over $400. You would never in your mind look at her five times and guess she was a lesbian. She totally is.

I believe people think that they have to fit into either role masculine or feminine. I always hear people asking gay couples who wears the pants and people believe you can look at the individual who appears more manly. Not true. My girlfriend at the time wore the pants.

I have a masculine stance. My explanation is that I am tall, african american, studied kick boxing and tang su doo. I played basketball in middle school. So my shoulders are more even and it took years of martial arts and kick boxing, track to get there. I can throw on a dress, and I only wear shoes 2 inches and higher and feel confident as a women with make-up etc.

Try not to put your self or anyone in a box of norms, traditions. No boxes! Be true to you and spread that around.

[flyinhernikes]

if you want to have long hair, have long hair.
if you want short hair have short hair.
if you want to wear dresses wear dresses
if you want to wear a suit wear a suit

it doesnt make you any less of a lesbian just cuz you dont sterotypically look like one. girly girls can like girls too