Sick of sounding like a whiny emo

[Anonymous]

I am just so sick of being lonely. I have people who understand and care, but I really just want that one special person whose smile can light up my day, who can listen to the most banal of dialogues and still want to hear more etc. etc.

I keep telling myself that that person is out there somewhere and I am doing what I can to possibly meet them but I'm just getting so sick of waiting and even more sick of moaning about it! I am getting progressively more depressed and rather than having butterflies in my stomach out of anticipation, I now get them out of dread that I will be alone forever.

[Anonymous]

Nope you're not whiny at all.

I understand that you want to find somebody, what's that saying "A watched pot never boils?"

Just try not to focus on that aspect so much. Keep your mind occupied with hobbies and interests. Go out for a nice long walk in a park, think about other parts of the future.

Age doesn't matter, I'm sure you're young enough though, that you're probably just stressing yourself so much at the prospect of being alone forever, when in fact, you still have a whole life ahead of you.

It'll happen, it will. Keep actively seeking out ways to possibly meet someone. But, don't worry so much about it. That special someone is out there waiting for you. Probably feeling the same way. Everything happens for a reason, certain events transpire that are just kind of meant to happen without knowing the entire dynamics of why they did, they just do. I'm sure you want to find Mr./Ms. right. Not, Mr./Ms. right now, just so you aren't lonely anymore. Right?

So, take this time you have right now for self-improvement. A time for introspection. You want someone who'll be a part of your world, not be your entire world.

There really is someone out there for everyone. But, if you have that philosophy "I'll be alone forever" well, that's going to be your self-fulfilling prophecy. Change your mindset to something more optimistic and it'll shine through. Promise, you'll meet that special someone one day that makes you weak in the knees, who's like the missing piece to the puzzle. That someone who'll take your hand and you can conquer the world together!

OK!

[Anonymous]

OP here.. Thank you for your inspiring response. Thing is, I keep doing all the things you say, have been for ages. Just some days, I can't help myself. I'm currently sitting at my office, in front of my desk, crying like a baby. Hope to god my boss doesn't come in!

I know these things take time, and effort, and don't just happen instantaneously. But I have been so lonely for so long. I just want to be comforted and loved, and be able to do the same for someone else! I honestly couldn't care less about sex I just want a companion..

[Anonymous]

Awe Please don't cry.... I know it's hard. I completely understand what you're feeling. Big hugs!!

I know you can hear the same thing over and over again and it's frustrating, especially when you do, do those things.

Is it just the loneliness that's really bothering you, or are there other things that are some sources of the problems? You don't need to answer, more just think about it. You might be depressed, which is understandable. But, then maybe you can talk to a therapist?

I suppose it's just a personality thing, of course everyone's different. For me personally, I'm not really invested in wanting a relationship at the moment, or maybe I've gotten used to being alone. Sure, I'd love to have what you described. But, I just don't let that become my main focus.

Think of it this way, enjoy the time you have alone now. Once you meet someone, you might not ever get that again (which isn't a bad thing) but, just relish the single life before you meet your future partner, perhaps you'll have kids? And then it'll be ages before you ever get to have that "peace" and time to yourself again!

What about joining a club or something? At least you'll meet new people. Doesn't have to be LGBT oriented. At least you'll get yourself out there.

If you want to PM me and talk you're more than welcome to. I know loneliness sucks...