Gay male, crush on straight girl...

[Anonymous]

So if things didn't suck as they already do, I think I have a crush on a girl.
(As the title says, I'm a gay male.)
I don't know what exactly I came here for, advice or just to get it out, but I'm just so confused. There isn't any sexual attraction at all, but she's all I think about. I want to spend all my time with her and hold her and hug her and just do everything with her. I think about her all the time.
It's depressing me, because I know that we wouldn't last because there isn't any sexual attraction. I'm really nervous about putting this out in the open just because I've spent so much time coming to terms with my sexuality and now I have a crush on a girl...
I mean, nobody can tell me what I do or don't feel right now. I think I have a crush. I'm sure it is... And it hurts to see her, because I know I'll only break her heart when she finds out I'm gay and it already breaks my heart to know I can't be with her.
I'm so confused and depressed by it... How do I get over it? She's honestly one of the most awesome people I've ever met.

[Just Passing]

Sounds like you are a Heteroromantic Homosexual, meaning you have romantic feelings for girls, but not sexual feelings for them. At least that's how it sounds to me.

And whether or not you tell her about how you feel is completely up to you. Does she know you're gay at all? Has she indicated any possible romantic interest in you? If she's as good as she sounds, she'll be fine with you being gay and having a crush on her at the same time. Maybe she's your perfect soul mate, even though there's nothing physical there.

Hope this helps.

[Mogget]

I'm currently in a similar situation. I'm gay, have ID'd as gay for years, but I'm currently crushing on an asexual panromantic girl. Like you, I have no sexual attraction with her, but I feel very very deeply for her. As Just Passing said, there can be a certain degree of disconnect between sexual orientation and romantic orientation, although I believe it's very rare for someone to be exclusively homosexual and exclusively heteroromantic or vice versa. The concept of romantic orientation is still relatively new, which is why you don't hear about it much, but I personally believe that it's very real.