coming out

[Anonymous]

Lately I been wondering if I'm gay or not and I think I found the answer that I'am Gay.

Well when I was talking to my friend and was about to tell her that I think I'm Gay I started getting really nervous and my heart started racing and started feeling very sick.

The day after I told her I just started feeling really sick and like i made a mistake of saying anything

My thinking is if I wasnt gay then admitting this to my friend wouldn't be this hard and made feel this bad right.

Has this happen to anyone when you came out to people close to you

What do these feelings mean.

[BudderMC]

It means you're nervous. It also means you're like 99.9% of the closeted population.

You see, the reason you're nervous about revealing this is there's always the fear that you're going to lose those people close to you when you come out to them, because you're changing their perception of you. In a sense, you feel like you've been lying to them this whole time. You might think "what if our whole friendship was a fake?" or "what if they won't like me anymore?".

So, that's why you were feeling nervous. As for why you were feeling sick, well... that's just nerves too. It's the same feeling you'd get when you're doing anything else that's really scary. Forcing yourself to reveal a secret that you've kept secret for so long is no easy task, and takes some real guts to do.

Don't use your nervousness as justification that you must not be gay, in fact, I'd use it as justification that you ARE gay. No need to push yourself to come out if you aren't ready; you'll know when you're comfortable and the time is right.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

I'm sort of going through this too! I get nervous just thinking of coming out to my cousin but I'm to the point where I'm ready to tell her the next time I see her! I also feel like I haven't been totally honest with her by not telling her that I'm a lesbian. And I'm scared of losing her after I come out to her, myself.. But I know once I do, things will be a lot more easy for me!
Good luck!