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Old 27th Jan 2013, 03:59 PM   #1
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Default BDD? Do I see a specialist psychiatrist?

Hey, not sure if this thread is appropriate for here as it isnt related to LGBT or my sexuality, but I am gay and a closet, but still would like some advice if any of you have any experience of this.

I have started to think I suffer from body dysmorphia disorder (BDD). I have always hated the way I look and always wanted to change it, but recently it has really been affecting my life.

I struggle to leave the house and much prefer staying in by myself. I also struggle to believe how my friends would ever be friends with me as I am so ugly. If i do go out and catch myself in the window reflection, I immediaetly hate what I see, and have to make some excuse to people as to why I look so bad.

Now this is where the difficulty comes in. Am I just really ugly or do I suffer from BDD?

I genuinely think I am ugly, and reasons for this which are unrefutable include: an obscenely large head for my body, with a hideous large nose and fat neck. Odd body shop which doesnt fit clothes in normal shops so I end up looking shit, horrible hair which never looks right, and flat feet so terrible posture, receeding hairline (at 23) as well as palmar and axillary hyperhydrosis, excessive sweating, meaning I tend to avoid social situations, and have withdrawn.

I am on antidepressants, having suffered with depression for many years. The tablets help all of the symptoms apart from the negative self image, but I remember having this since, forever to be honest. I have told my GP who is reluctant to refer me to an NHS psychiatrist, and says it is a side effect of the antidepressants and we should try new ones, but I like how they are working, for the rest of me.

I have money saved up, approximately £1500 which is for surgery (cheekpad removal, chin implant and neck liposuction) but am wondering should I go for a private psychiatrist referrral who specialises in BDD (~£200-£500) or go simply for the surgery, which will require a bit more saving I know. I have tried CBT, online CBT, one to one CBT, self help books, talking to family. None of it works. I think I am just ugly, but surgery can begin to improve it I believe.

So does anyone have any experience in this? I feel like private psychiatric help may be beneficial but I think its alot of money when I can partly solve the problem through surgery?

I realise this isnt LGBT directly related, and is more of a psych problem, but the anonymous forum on here is brilliant and all of you guys have great life experience and skills.
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Old 27th Jan 2013, 04:16 PM   #2
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Default Re: BDD? Do I see a specialist psychiatrist?

Everybody has something about their appearance they don't like, but when the dislike is so intense it prevents you from having an active social life because you'd rather not leave the house there is definitely a problem. Wanting to have expensive cosmetic surgery is another good indicator.

I'm no expert and can't diagnose you, but I definitely want to encourage you to seek some professional individualized help before you have any surgery done. It sounds like you've tried a lot of things which is good but nothing appears to have helped you so perhaps you really need to talk to someone who understands these kind of thoughts and can help you with ways to handle them.

Good luck!
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