Joining a GLBT group

[Asteroid]

Hi,

For the last two months or so, I wanted to join a local GLBT group. I thought that this could help me in my coming out process and get to know a few people that I can relate to (see none of my friends are gay and they don't know that I'm and none of my family members know either). But here is the problem....every time I'm on the verge of trying to join the group I'm getting so nervous that I chicken out. Sometimes, I will pass their office several times during the same day, but I never can go in and introduce myself and join. I went into the office once, and just talked nonsense because I was so nervous and just ran out again....yeah, that went well. Any suggestions on what I could do? Thanks!

[sayitforreals]

What is there to be afraid of?

[s5m1]

Asteroid, you are not alone. I can't bring myself to join one either. I have never made it in the front door.

[Asteroid]

Thanks guys!

What is there to be afraid of?
That's a good question! I don't really know...

I was relieved to read that there is someone else that is struggling with this. I thought it is just me that has this problem...It sounds simple enough, but for some reason it is not.

[Quitex]

It is HARD to come out, even to gay people that will.... obviously accept and support you.
You know what? Take your time. You will join them whenever you're ready. Just, push yourself a little everyday :)

[joeyconnick]

Breathe. Seriously. Just focus on breathing when you want to go in. Put your mind on autopilot, focus on breathing, go in there and just try to listen as much as possible.

Most of the time when we freak out we forget to breathe normally and that ramps up our anxiety. It's very hard to be super-nervous when you are focused on taking deep breaths. I'm not saying you won't be nervous but you will probably be able to avoid the "I'm babbling and freezing and my body won't do what I want it to do" nervous attack.

[joeyconnick]

Oh and I probably walked past the gay group on campus 8 gazillion times before I had the nerve to get involved. When I was in the process of coming out, that is. Sometimes you just need to kick yourself in the ass and say, "I'm being ridiculous."

[Asteroid]

Thanks for your help and the great advice!

I'll try taking it a bit slower. Maybe it's a bit too early - but I'll keep trying. I'll try to focus on breathing normally (which I haven't done) and just stay relaxed the next time. Thanks guys!

[Jim1454]

I think most of us have anxiety about doing that kind of thing for the first time.

You aren't the first person to go in and kind of freak out - and you won't be the last - so don't let that bother you. Just give it another shot when you're ready.

[sdc91]

Just remember, the people in there are just like you.

And if you run into a friend there . . . well then, he knows what you're going through and he's not going to out you (and you've got dirt on him too if he's not out).

[EthanS]

ahh i wanna join one too :[

[Ty]

ahh i wanna join one too :[

Found you one. (http://lgbt.manchester.ac.uk/)

[EthanS]

0_0 lol thx :P il think bout goin ^_^

[Ty]

0_0 lol thx :P il think bout goin ^_^

No problem:):icon_wink