Tug Of War

[Trumpetplyer23]

Summer vacation offers waaaayyy too much time to think, I'll tell you that.

On to the story, I feel as if there is a tug of war going on inside my head, about my friend. The one I fell for so many months ago, told, and lost the friendship. Well, a little update. It's June and I told her in January. After some odd encounters (including one in the principal's office), we've started rebuilding our friendship, and I'm extremely happy about that. I've gotten over the awkwardness around her that plagued me for so long.

However, I still find her physically attractive. As for looks and body type, she's got what I want in a woman. Her personality is amazing as well. I just want to be friends with her, I don't want to feel anything else for her, because I know what happens and I don't want it to happen again. Also, I'm in a relationship right now, and I don't believe in cheating.

So, what I'm saying is, I'm still attracted to her but I don't want to be more than friends with her...How should I handle such a thing?

[Louise]

We cannot chose who we are attracted to, all you can do is decide how you want to behave. In order to avoid a repeat performance of your earlier story, it would probably be best if you only hang out with her with other friends and avoid being alone with her. Spend as much time with your g/f as possible and when you are not with her make sure you are doing activities which will stop you thinking too much about her.

There is not much more than that that you can do. Sorry if it is not much help.

[Trumpetplyer23]

...should have specifed, I have a bf, who lives like an hour away from moi and goes to a different school. And I'm not old enough to drive and even if I was, I don't have a car...

I think the most confusing part is, I don't want a relationship with her, but I still find her physically attractive, and I'd rather be friends with her, than anything else.

When I first liked her, we never really spent time alone. I don't really invite people over to my house and she was really busy with school sports.

[Louise]

In that case concerntrate on being just friends, if you find yourself thinking about her physique, think of something else, don't let yourself dwell on it. Try and enjoy her company for what it is. If you find yourself being physically attracted then stay away from her a bit and spend some more time with your g/f (where possible) Is there not a train you can catch to be with your g/f or have some sleep overs over the vacation period.

[Trumpetplyer23]

.....Ah, if Ohio had such a public transport system...I live out in the middle of nowhere...So, yeah...not happening..

Thanks for the advice, though, I really appreciate it.