Do your friends think your gay?

[nisomer]

Well, I was in class today talking to my friend, and somehow the subject of jacking off came up. He asked me if I jacked off and I said joking, "Yeah, I jackoff to you everynight." He laughed and said, "Seriously, do you?" I, have no idea why hes asking me this, and I joke again saying, "I told you, I jackoff to you and Phil everynight."

Then this is what he says to me, "Nick, your not gay. If you were gay you would have told me." Then I was like, "Yeah...since I am SO honest."

Then something happened and we had to get back to work. But I was really surprised by his comment, saying that I'm not gay. I guess either I am really good at hiding my secret lol, or maybe his impression on a gay person is the stereotypical one we all see portrayed in the media. So I was wondering, do you guys think anything of what your friends think of you? Like, do you think some of your friends suspect you are gay?

[hawkeye]

heck, if anyone of my friends figured out i was, i think i'd start wondering about them! All my friends see me as the "pimp", the guy catching all the girls and going with older (only 1 or 2 years older) girls to school dances. Sure, i drop a hint here and there, but i think they'd have to be on a completely different train of thought to pick up on them.

[Jordano]

All my life people have thought I was gay, but then realize I have a hott girlfriend for four years and shrug the idea off - its all because Im so stereotypically gay. Im also referred to as the pimp of the group - I have a pickup line for everything - but can joke around with guys about gay stuff because they know me well enough to know Im not (or do they)...

[Aaron]

Most people I come across know pretty quick. Either it's because it comes up in a conversation or they just know. I'm very open about it, and I never lie if people ask me. It's not a poblem for me.

My boss at work told me the other day that he knew there was something he liked about me, but couldn't put his finger on it until he heard me and sarah talking about guys the other day. (He's gay, too). He's so great.

[goratrix]

They don't... yet. Although I started a while ago to give some hints... and they become more frecuent and obvious as time passes. They just take it as jokes, or my tendency to be misterious... but I think some of them already suspect.

Although the three people I told did tell me that they didn't expect that from me... oh, well... who knows. I don't want to underestimate them, but I don't think they've given it enought thought. If they had then most of them would have figured it out by now... they are not narrow minded, and most of them have gay friends/relatives.

[KamiKazeM6]

Honestly, i have no idea what my friends think. I believe some suspect and some have no clue. I am semi out of the closet, well in the process. (I have told my best friends, granted it is only three people but it is a big step for me) Lately though i have been acting more like myself. While not admitting i am gay i still stand up for their rights. If my friend says something predjudice against any minority i will stand up to them. :icon_cool

[goratrix]

our rights... and why should we even have different rights... we are all humans for crying out loud!!!

[Micah]

I'm always joking around with my friends about stuff like that. Like the other day some guy just randomly asked me 'are you gay'. So walked up close to him and I said in a sexy tone "yeah I am, and I've been waiting to make a move on you for soo long, but I was just....too.....shy" and I finished up with my face 3cm away from his.

To the point: The topic about gay people came up between a friend a myself, and I asked who she thinks is most likely to be gay (out of our friends) and then I asked if she thought I could be gay. Her reply: "You're too gay to actually be gay" lol. She didn't mean I'm camp or anything, but that i muck around too much, like 'pretending to be gay' (as they see it) so people just assume that I'm comfortable with being straight :grin:

[Lava421]

Surprisingly, my friends seem to not know about this. I mean, I'm not a flamboyant guy but sometimes I feel my mannerisms say otherwise. When I talk to my friends and the subject arrives, I nearly always am quiet and eventually get called straight. Some examples:

I was faking being paranoied of touching hands. Because of this phobia, a friend asked what I'll do when I get a girlfriend.

Same situation as above except with another person who said "I guess you've never had a girlfriend."

She's so hot. Don't you think so? (I know this doesn't mean he assumed I was straight but it's almost there.) (Same person: ) "You like Asian women, don't you?"

A chemistry partner gave me a picture of a girl and asked if she's hot to confirm his belief.

We were talking about masturbation (don't ask :P). A person asked how often I do it and called me "straight." In his mind, homosexuals are "cleaner."

To be what I thought was funny, I acted like I was avoiding ordering food at a certain restaurant so I persuaded a friend to order me something from this restaurant. He concluded a "hot girl" working there goes to my school and I have a crush on her.

Other friends now jokingly refer to her as my "girlfriend."

While playing a game involving the word "penis," somebody suggested we make it more heterosexual by using "vagina" instead. During this game, somebody said I would be "gay" if I didn't participate.

A friend sent me a link to a picture of a naked girl. :icon_surp

[xyc]

I actually find this kind of thing really funny.

I've made friends with this guy that the whole school says and thinks is gay. I still don't know if he is or not. The friend I sit with in French class, however, quite often starts to talk to me about this other gay friend and just the things he says and way he talks makes it so obvious that he doesn't have a clue I'm gay. (I'm in a new school this year, so I haven't known any of these new guys very long, though). :icon_mrgr

To Lava421: Yeah, things like all those examples used to happen to me ALL the time. And, I've been this kind of reserved and quiet person for the last many years so I never liked it. I don't know how old you are, but now I'm 17 and I've changed schools and things like that haven't happen nearly as much here; I think it may have to do with just people maturing somewhat. My friend in French always points out when a hot chick's wearing a tiny skirt or if you can see her panties or something, though. However, I don't mind... I only with I knew what kind of expression I should put on, lol!

Also, along the same lines, in the past I'd ALWAYS avoid sexuality conversations (which eventually led to me avoiding ALL conversations) because I was so shy and confused still... and I'm one of those people whose faces go red when anything even mildly embarassing/whatever happens... But this year my personality is changing and I'm so much happier at my new school. Lately, I've done really 'gay' things. Like, I'll just suddenly write a note to my friend about 'Hey don't you think that guy is hot' about someone. The interesting thing, of course, is that doing that ensures everyone that you're NOT gay. The only thing is that I don't like the 'gay joking around with friends' things when it gets physical... for some obvious reasons. And it happened once with this guy I have a terrible crush on (my friend in French class this is, actually) and so I went red and started to get hard and got uncomfortable touching him even where I was... (part of me wanted to go FURTHER and part of me wanted to back off NOW so maybe I could still be friends with him, ugh!)

Okay, long enough post...

[Blink]

All of my friends already know I'm gay. All anyone else has to do is see my flailing arms when I talk, and they understand.

[nisomer]

Also, along the same lines, in the past I'd ALWAYS avoid sexuality conversations (which eventually led to me avoiding ALL conversations) because I was so shy and confused still... and I'm one of those people whose faces go red when anything even mildly embarassing/whatever happens... But this year my personality is changing and I'm so much happier at my new school.

That was pretty much the same with me my past couple years, and that is why I became very anti-social. But like you, I am much better and happier this year because I think that I have truly realized and accepted myself.

[joeyconnick]

All of my friends already know I'm gay. All anyone else has to do is see my flailing arms when I talk, and they understand.That is SO funny! :lol:

All my friends know I'm gay and have for a while. I don't quite have the "flailing arms" things going on but when I start going on about my life and whoever I'm pining away for this week, it becomes pretty evident pretty quick. I'm definitely not butch... in fact, some of the best fun I have with friends is pretending to be stereotypically straight, saying stuff like "dude that's so gay" and "that girl is hott!" :)

[goratrix]

and I'm one of those people whose faces go red when anything even mildly embarassing/whatever happens...

The same thing happens to me. I hate it... it's so obvious I'm nervous... and I always get like that when I'm arround AC, and I start thinking about him in sexual ways... and people just would ask me how I do it, to get red at will. I usually joke making a gesture with my hand that obviously represents masturbating... but then again... it's almost true.

After a while I became really quiet and reserverd. I wouldn't speak unless completely sure of what I was saying, and I would just avoid any embarrassing situation at all costs. And it costed me greatly, for now I don't seem to have the ability to relate with other people... Oh, well... I'm turning red just remembering that stuff...

[popboy]

They don't... yet. Although I started a while ago to give some hints... and they become more frecuent and obvious as time passes. They just take it as jokes, or my tendency to be misterious... but I think some of them already suspect.
After a while I became really quiet and reserverd. I wouldn't speak unless completely sure of what I was saying, and I would just avoid any embarrassing situation at all costs. And it costed me greatly, for now I don't seem to have the ability to relate with other people... Oh, well... I'm turning red just remembering that stuff...

Would you believe if I told you I could have written those paragraphs myself?

Regarding the topic, I think my friends don't have a clue. I've always been very shy and not flamboyant at all, and at my current age no one would expect me to come out. After all, I have my personality and I probably don't seem to be the kind of person that might hide something for this long (somehow I managed to do so).
***insight***
I was about the age I should have come out if I had been conscious enough (17 or 18), when after leaving a disco a girl from school said something about me that really disturbed me. She was drunk, so I don't know if she remembers (I was completely sober as usual). I've just recalled this incident. It happened ages ago. She was talking about a conversation about me she had kept with my best female friend (who happened to be also drunk in the same cab sitting next to us), and she clearly hinted that they thought I had no feelings for the opposite sex. I can't remember her exact words, but remember I felt like "no matter how hard you try, they will think there's something different about you". I didn't want to be different. Repression did its job and the whole incident was buried somewhere in my memory... until today.
***sighs***
I do love catharsis :-)

[joeyconnick]

She was talking about a conversation about me she had kept with my best female friend (who happened to be also drunk in the same cab sitting next to us), and she clearly hinted that they thought I had no feelings for the opposite sex. I can't remember her exact words, but remember I felt like "no matter how hard you try, they will think there's something different about you". I didn't want to be different.Well no, most people don't want to be different but yeah, it sounds like a lot of people are overcompensating on the whole "let's hide that we're gay" thing. Perceptive people will always be able to tell something is up--not necessarily what it is, but definitely that there is something going on.

The only way to deal with that is to somehow come to terms with yourself, I think. That's not to say you have to come out but more like... I don't know, you need to accept it or something.

And everyone is "different" in some way, and feels like they don't belong. There's just varying degrees of that. I know I made being different pretty much like a badge (like goratrix about being proud of being a nerd) only to discover how "human" (i.e. like everyone else) I really am. Which is not to say I'm ordinary or anything but rather that no matter how different we may be or think we are, we are all human and there are some definite commonalities between people.

[nisomer]

Well today on aim I had another situation in which someone assumed I was straight.

My friend asked me if I knew who this guy was, and I said yes I knew him. And heres the rest of the conversation directly from aim:

Her: you guys friends?
Me: not really
Her: you think hes good looking for a guy?
Me: uhh
Me: lol
Her: just be gay for one second
Her: if you were gay would u look at him?
Me: "look at him"?
Her: like think hes hot
Me: lol
Her: cme onnn
Me: not really
Her: oh okay
Me: lol
Me: ok i have to go mow the lawn
Me: bye
Her: bye!

I wanted to so badly tell her I was gay right when she said "just be gay for one second". Man...but if I do tell someone it would have to be in person. Well at least I didn't lie, cuz the guy isn't really that hot lol.

[goratrix]

Although, it would have been an excelent oportunity to say something like: hell yeah! I'd do him right here on my desk if I had the chance.

A good way to give hints... XD

[hawkeye]

Its funny how girls like to do stuff like that. I guess girls normaly compare other girls more that straight guys would, and the girls dont realize that. I've been asked plenty of times by girls if a guy was hot, and usualy they have good taste, but it's not like i was about to say anything. I also remember being asked that around a kid I would have guessed was gay, and he did the same thing and kind of dismissed the question. I have no idea if he is gay, but if he is, i wouldnt be surprized if he held it in just because i was around.

[d00d]

This is an interesting topic.

Thinking back on this issue, the only people who've said "I kinda already knew" after I shared that special fact with them were the people I gave sufficient hints to. Otherwise no one ever really was sure. Which I'm happy about I think.

[joeyconnick]

Its funny how girls like to do stuff like that. I guess girls normaly compare other girls more that straight guys would, and the girls dont realize that. I've been asked plenty of times by girls if a guy was hot, and usualy they have good taste, but it's not like i was about to say anything. I also remember being asked that around a kid I would have guessed was gay, and he did the same thing and kind of dismissed the question. I have no idea if he is gay, but if he is, i wouldnt be surprized if he held it in just because i was around.I've always found women to be WAY less hung up about sexuality in general. Maybe it's the women who've been in my life but it sure seems to me like guys are much more freaked out by stuff like that.

[goratrix]

Yeah, LM (who is striaght) actually told me that she... well... experimented with a girl.

Hmmm, perhaps that's the perfect excuse... let see how it sounds:

me: Hey, AC, you know I have a scientific mind, and am always thinking of new experiments and theories

AC: right, so?

me: well, I kinda need you for an experiment...

AC: ein?

me: well, all you have to do is relax and enjoy... I'll take care of the rest...

AC: what the hell?

*me lying on the floor after getting kicked in the face by AC*
*AC grabs a knife and proceeds to dismember me*

hmmm, don't think I like that scenario...

[hawkeye]

lol, jokingly demented minds are great.

i think my friends are somewhat wondering about me, I'm not sure though. They soo me as a sort of pimp, so i think they would feel that there is enough proof of me being straight. One thing changed recently though, about a week ago we were hanging out for the day and i decided to give most of my straight mags to one of my porn addicted friends. I made sure to keep one, Sports Illiustrated, but i think he found it somewhat odd. I just told him that i dont ever look at porn anymore (which is actualy completely true). Well, today at band, my porn addicted friend mentioned how i was " turning gay" on them. considering i was just sucking on dum-dums, i didnt realy respond, but i am sure it was only told as a joke. It was only around me and my 2 good friends, and my crush, K. hmm, maybe it's a good thing that they are joking about me being gay around him, it'd give me a little more lee-way to "joke around" around him. ehh, everything can wait a little longer.

[freakoffashion01]

That is SO funny! :lol:

All my friends know I'm gay and have for a while. I don't quite have the "flailing arms" things going on but when I start going on about my life and whoever I'm pining away for this week, it becomes pretty evident pretty quick. I'm definitely not butch... in fact, some of the best fun I have with friends is pretending to be stereotypically straight, saying stuff like "dude that's so gay" and "that girl is hott!" :)




Most of my friends know I'm gay too. I don't have the flailing arms either. But most of my girlfriends love it when I do a straight guy impersonation. I think it's because I mock it, making it painfully obvious that I'm not striaght...

[goratrix]

Hey, welcome freakoffashion... hope you enjoy your stay here...

[freakoffashion01]

Thanks. I'm sure I will...

[nisomer]

Well I thought I would bring this thread back up in the midst of something else that happend to me...Last week in chemestry class, we were doing some lab work, and my friend C comes up to me and looks over at my data. He turns to our other friend who was his lab partner and said something like, "Hey why is Nick's (me) info way different then ours?"

I turned and answered, "Uhh maybe because you guys are dumb?"

He then said (not literally, but instead derogatorily), "Dude are you gay???"

All of a sudden my teacher walks up and says, "Did you just ask if he was gay?"

C, lyingly said, "no..."

Then my teacher replies saying, "Be careful what you say...you never know."


Just thought I'd share that with you guys...the whole time I was just laughing inside!!

[hawkeye]

lol, thats great.
Thanks for bringing this thread back, It's funny to go back and read what i had written 5 months ago. Still have a crush on the same kid as i had mentioned in my last post in this thread. So over the summer, while at band camp, a bunch of us, including him, were hanging out in a room, and i started hitting on him. My friends found it hillarious (i did too), but nobody could have known that i had the "serious, but not serious, seriously" mentality. Anyways, after telling my friends a month later, they found it even funnier that i wasnt really joking with him.
Everybody I've told so far has been shocked btw. I guess my hints were well hidden before.

[Micah]

Well recently I've been planting more, less subtle hints. I'm always going out with my boyfriend and other gay friends, and my straight friends are always asking questions, such as "how do you know them?" etc. I always avoid these questions, obviously changing the subject, which creates a lot of suspicion.

My best straight friend has cottoned on, however. He's been voicing his 'concerns' to my other straight friends while I'm not there, although I'm out to one of my straight friends, who's been filling me in.

Anyway, we had a casual dress day at school (we usually wear uniform, tie, blazer and all) and I'm wearing my new polo shirt, jeans and flip flops. My best friend was bitching about fashion, and how stupid it is that straight guys are dressing like gay guys to get girls' attention. Then he says "Like that shirt for instance, its so gay...but then again you ARE gay so *meh*." We always joke around calling each other gay, but this was just different. I know he'll accept me, but I'm waiting untill the end of the year to come out to all my friends.

Until then I suppose I'll just play along with his comments.

[BaciListClostridium]

And everyone is "different" in some way, and feels like they don't belong. There's just varying degrees of that. I know I made being different pretty much like a badge (like goratrix about being proud of being a nerd) only to discover how "human" (i.e. like everyone else) I really am. Which is not to say I'm ordinary or anything but rather that no matter how different we may be or think we are, we are all human and there are some definite commonalities between people.

Ugh, that is SO true.

I'm pretty stereotypically gay. Most of my close friends are girls; I'm a big fan of figure skating and gymnastics (and not interested whatsoever in football, basketball, baseball, or hockey); I tend to like female singers over male ones; and I have a high-pitched voice. In fact, I'm pretty much the poster child for a gay boy except that I don't like to shop. I think most people suspect I'm gay, but no one ever wants to assume.

Oh, you know what? Who remembers when that stupid magazine (was it Details?) printed a feature entitled (something like) "Is he gay -- or just Asian?" The connotation was that Asian men often appear to be gay, but that's just b/c they're like that. I think maybe people think that about me (i.e. they think, "Well, he seems kind of gay, but he IS Asian, so I don't know...")

[goratrix]

Well, I have become more and more a stereotype in the last few months. One factor was comming out to all my friends (I think there are three of them that don't know yet, but they could figure it out on their own, and we don't see each other that much). I guess the other factor is a friend, most likely she'll be reading this, so I won't talk much about her ;-). She kinda made more stereotypically gay... Like, I wouldn't go shopping if my life depended on it, and I wouldn't wear jeans, nor any white clothing (with the obvious exception of the tkd do-bok).

Now, she actually got me to go shopping, and enjoy it!! I guess most people that know me, in my old HP t-shirt, would actually be surprised by this... but hey.

So I guess it all comes down to circumstances... and oh, yeah, my great common sense... that tells me that yellow sleevless tank tops are a big no-no... XD

AND THIS IS FOR YOU!!!

btw, it was funny to read this old thread... I think I'll dedicate a weekend to searching the archives of this forum reading old posts and trying to establish differences between how I used to think and how I think now... just to fulfill my obsessiveness and see if perhaps I grew something in the past few months...

[nisomer]

haha well you better get started, you got 496 posts to go!

[Micah]

haha well you better get started, you got 496 posts to go!

Hehe.

Goodluck Goratrix. I hope its insightful for you :)

[CryCrazy27]

old thread.

no one has joked around about me being gay.

one of my car buddies though does kinda. hes 25yo good lookin too, cept hes straight with his fiance lol. he jokes about teh cock and other sexual things alot online, but not so much in person.
one aim convo went..
HIM: sup?
ME: hey man not much, how is *car.gibberish.talk*.
HIM: *more.car.gibberish.talk*. bout you, still gay?
ME: ehhh..

stuff like that. alot of "suck my dick" talk but i expect that is jut how his personality is.

[hawkeye]

"you still gay?" lol. Hmm, I would definately respond with "want me to prove it?"

Yea, I've never been really stereotypical.. At all. I've even had a friend say that I'm terrible at being gay. well, that is except for liking guys. I have been accused of being gay for listening to Elton John. It was kinda funny. I was in a meeting, and I had asked my advisor if he went to the Elton John concert, he had, and in response another member said "Elton John? But he's gay!". My advisor and I burst out laughing. He responded with "My brother's gay, are you afraid that i might infect you with a disease?"

[joeyconnick]

stuff like that. alot of "suck my dick" talk but i expect that is jut how his personality is.I would totally be taking him out for drinks frequently if he were making comments like that to me. :eusa_whis :tongue:

[CryCrazy27]

ya...lol my day will come. hes said stuff like "circle jerk" and all the other typical joke around gay stuff. in person though hes not really like that....just online. so i dunno....maybe a couple beers... hehe. if that ever happens (he lives with wife)

[joeyconnick]

Oh he's married? Ooops... I must have missed that part.

That being said, circle jerks sound like fun. (!)

[hakeem_uk]

i think some of my friends think i am and the other do not think that

[LowestVocal017]

I actually didn't want my friends to know I'm gay (bisexual, anyways). They're fine with gay people, but just, I don't know. I don't like bringing up my personal life and people don't need to be in it, I guess. But then again, I guess I deserved getting the fact that people are knowledgeable of my sexual orientation because I always am "flaunting it." I'm such a show-offy type person. When there is an opportunity to display something of myself that is different generally to others, I would do so. So that was my consequence. LOL!

Anyways, a few of my female friends from choir know, as well as a few straight friends.

~LowestVocal017

[Paul_UK]

All my friends know I'm gay. As do my family, neighbours, window cleaner.... :)

It's easier being out to new people that you meet in life because they have never known you as not out. So in a new job or whatever I am always out from day one.

So I think going from school to work or college could be a good opportunity to be out straight away. Though if a load of people from school are starting at the same college at the same time, that's not so easy.

[tired_of_lying411]

For my future use, how are you 'out from day one'? Thats what i plan to do, but, like do you just walk up to someone and be like, "Hi, I'm new here. I'm gay"?????

[hakeem_uk]

I don't really want my friend to know or find out by someone else
"am gay"
And am happy the way i am:love:
:kiss: (&&&)

[joeyconnick]

For my future use, how are you 'out from day one'? Thats what i plan to do, but, like do you just walk up to someone and be like, "Hi, I'm new here. I'm gay"?????That works but it's usually a little more subtle to say, "Hey, that guy's pretty hot!" or "So do you know any good gay clubs around here?"

It's really QUITE simple--I've never understood why people think it's so difficult. Just think about how heterosexual people indicate they're straight--because even though they have no need to, they do ALL the time.

[Paul_UK]

For my future use, how are you 'out from day one'? Thats what i plan to do, but, like do you just walk up to someone and be like, "Hi, I'm new here. I'm gay"?????
My approach is to answer any questions honestly, but without making a big deal of it. For example when I started at my previous job I had this sort of conversation a few times:

Are you married?

No, but I've lived with my partner for x years.

Ohh, what's her name and what does she do?

His name is Mark and he works at Woolworths.

Reactions vary, but normally it causes the questioner to pause momentarily then take the conversation to "safer" territory, such as "Where did you work before you started here?".

That's fine for me. They know, it's not a big deal, and I can get on with what I'm being paid for.

If you're lucky or crafty, one of the people you'll have this conversation with will be the company gossip. Then the whole place will know within a week and you won't have to bother about it. I made a point of finding out who the gossip was (by asking the receptionist) and managed to be at the coffee machine just as she was getting drinks for her whole department. :D

The idea is not to half-answer questions to avoid things, but not to make a big deal of the situation either. Act as though you being gay and (if you are lucky) having a male partner is just no different to them being straight and married.

The only thing that makes it slightly tricky is that there are not that many words/phrases for "same sex partner". Straights have "the wife", "the missus" etc, but we either "partner" which is not gender specific, or "boyfriend" which is fine when you're in your teens and 20s but not really when you're in your 40s! Since he has an obviously male name, I just referred to him as "Mark".

[GQMan]

Well before I told them I am sure they suspected. I had never had a gf and never really showed much interests in girls. I would answer if a girl was hot or not if they asked me but I never really brought up girls. And I am sure some of them have caught me staring at a hot guy if he happens to walk by. I cant help it if my eyes catch on to a hot dude. Its just so hard not to check them out lol. I'm not super flamboyant or femme or anything. I am actually quite masculine. And I would always make gay jokes. Which always made their eyes open wide and they gave me a look like. Yeah totally gay or could he be gay? It was fun actually playing with straight guys. lol

[StudentofSchool]

I never showed interest in any girls either. My mother seems worried about me because of this.

Anyway, my situation is quite perplexing as it ranges from people thinking I am gay to people thinking I am a homophobe. I guess maybes that is a result of my behavior when the topic of gay is mentioned, I pretend to act uncomfortable with it. People also think I am gay when they first meet me because I put on a semblance of a perfect gentlemen. I tell people I don't curse, hit, yell, talk dirty,etc. I guess it is kinda unusual to act this way but I do it so I seem like a WASP and therefore cannot be gay. However, some students didn't understand and thought it was gay. They eventually get used to it and stop thinking I was gay.

[ok455]

They always ask me am i gay becuse i like to touch guys and hug on them and grab there butts etc.

[tired_of_lying411]

well until recently I assumed that ALL of my friends had at LEAST a suspision... but then i came out to my best friend and had to spend 15 minutes getting her to actually believe me... what a surprise to me!!
Now I have decided to not worry about if they know or not. I will tell them all eventually, and until then, if they know or don't is out of my control.

[LowestVocal017]

They always ask me am i gay becuse i like to touch guys and hug on them and grab there butts etc.

LOL! At my marching band, the guys, who are straight, are the ones who grab each other's ends. I've never done that. Personally, I think it's just immature, but hey, it's highschool. ;) LOL! :icon_razz

Anyways, I forgot to mention that unfortunately, with me not wanting people to know about my homosexuality, I'm the typical gay guy as portrayed in propagando and stereotypes: very feminine, touchy-feely, kissy-pooh, purple and fuchsia, and all that other stuff. So, to finally answer the question in the original post, most people at my school, including those who don't know me or don't know me personally, will easily point me out and suspect that I'm gay (without thinking further what that actually means. They just see what they'd learned in the stereotype to be gay). Although I'm not sure if they actually know that I'm gay. Barely any of my friends, except for a few girl friends in choir who are close to me, know.

People also think I am gay when they first meet me because I put on a semblance of a perfect gentlemen. I tell people I don't curse, hit, yell, talk dirty,etc.

This is a very interesting case, and I have something to relate to it with. In a chat room, I always told my enemies (don't ask!) that I hate swearing and hate being perverted, that I like to speak grammaically correctly and all. Even though they already think that I am gay (I didn't tell them anything), they went on talking about how I'm the typical gay guy for not liking to swear. They were like, "oh, normal teenage guys swear, and talk about boobs, and don't act all kind and nice and gentle, and all that. But I guess your gay, so it's not surprising you're like that," and so on and so forth. From this, I wonder if that too is a part of the "gay stereotype," that gay guys are more "proper" and hate swearing. Hmm...

[chrisg]

LOL...I generally swear a lot.

[Bobby]

Most of my friends and people around my school dont think Im gay. Im kind of a guys' guy. I like the outdoors and all that typical male stuff. If anyone doubts that im hetero. I just ignore it and they back off. That and I ive had more girls approach me than any of my other guy friends.

My two best friends know im gay. One of them really, really liked this girl once, but she really liked me. Then me and her started 'talking' and my friend said 'God fucking hates me!'.

[LowestVocal017]

Hi, Bobby! Welcome to Empty Closets! Hope you have enjoyed your first visit. Come back anytime you need or would like to have a discussion, k? (*hug*) :kiss:

LOL! That must have been really bad luck for your friend. I've had that happen to me too quite some times. Girls just go for me instead of their lovers. Hehe, :grin: I guess there's some kind of Charm in us gay and bi guys that isn't in straight guys. Pretty soon, we'll be stealing girlfriends too. LOL!!(!) (!)

Yep, it'll fun to see their reaction... :tantrum: :tantrum: :tantrum: :tantrum: :tantrum:

[Proud1p4]

All of my closest friends know (8 girls 1 guy) and some other people who are slowly starting to suspect :D (1 girl 1 guy)....btw thats a good thing to me, which you'd know if youve been reading my posts. But as ive said before....at first glance im not tooo obvious...i do have alot of the sterotypes, but you have to be looking closely.

[ezbsvs]

well...so far into my wonderful new life only my very best friend knows and its taken forever for him to figure it out and i finally had to blurt it out and then he took a while for it to sink in. cause i have some of the gay characteristics and all. but you have to kinda look for them...i think...(i have been known to be wrong)... mostly im just rather more artist than many people. and my hair. part of a dare/bet/joke back in 7th grade, me and some friends decided to see who could grow their hair the longest. i am still in the lead. but only because everyone else wussed out. so now my hair is unaturally long (couple inches past the shoulders) and every girl in the school is jealous of it. dont know why...
but yeah...

i

[charley]

me and my mates joke quite alot about gay stuff, i think that a couple of them have an idea that am gay, it was only on new years eve when one of them came out with a comment that "we wounder about u sometimes" and i asked wot he meant and he said that they have all talked about wether i was gay or not i just shruged it off but the next day it got me thinking and i was thinking of all the little things that i must do to make them wounder if am gay?? but i we all went on holiday this summer and we were at the beech and i cudnt help looking at the hot guys walking up and down the beech, and am sure on one ocasion my mate asked wot i was looking at and i cudnt reply and went bright red so i think thats when the started to get surpicious.

they proberbly do think am gay!

[14yearsold]

well, i don't know.. maybe yeah... they think that i'm gay... but they don't take it seriously... i mean sometimes they tease me... but anyway... i don't know

:)

Nice topic by the way

[Nodnarb]

I really don't know if they do...but sometimes I get the feeling they do. I haven't gone about trying to put up a front of being straight, and I at least think I've let out some hints. But my friends can be incredibly dense sometimes, so who knows if they even noticed....They're always making gay jokes and comments, so that kind of makes me think they don't think I am...

Hmm...I don't think they know for sure, but I don't think they will be surprised when I come out to them.

[Tokarov]

Do they know?

I've told 4 friends, out of those 4, 3 have been accepting. the 4th said "ok" and stopped talking to me, but, I guess you can't win them all....

The 3 I told said that I give hints sometimes, but they never really thought of it as me being gay. There all girls. They've said some of the guy friends I know somtimes notice, but they never think about it or want to ask me about it.

I got lucky once too, a close friend, who goes to another school across town, actually posed as my girlfriend for a day, in front of my friends, and like half the school, we held hands, she kissed me on the cheek...so I guess that I'm pretty well hidden for now.

I go to a private Catholic school. (no, we're not all spoiled, im on the finance support list :dry: alot of people think we're all spoiled :dry: )

Being at that kind of school, I need all the cover I can get.

[mrrolemodel]

hahah. yeah. most people get that impression from me.

[GunStarre]

They do think I am. But not full-out gay. Most likely bi, because if you'd seen what my (girl) friends and I do at lunch, I'd doubt you'd think I'm completely gay.

If only I'd known about them wondering if I'm gay, I would have thought about coming out before now.

[lostinthought9]

i think some of them suspect....cuz one time on the bus we were playing truth or dare (cuz we're such mature teenagers lol) and she asked me i ever thought about guys in a sexual way, and of course i said no, but i felt me face turn red lol:bang: , but its all cool, cuz i kinda cover it up with all the wrestling divas half-naked posted on my wall lol..
*sighs* as soon as i come out, i'm gonna add some guys onto my wall lol

[waitingsucks]

My homophobic friend(who won't admit his phobia) is still one of my best friends and he saw my history a few years ago. lol, anyways someone came up to me one day (let's call them tim) tim said "are you gay?" in the middle of a conversation I said "What?" and got really embarrased, later I found out that he says that to everyone. haha

[pirateninja]

All my school friends know I'm gay, but there are still some friends of the family who "suspect" it, but just say nothing.

[Martin]

It's hard to tell really. I think they may be a tad suspicious, and have made jokes about it before. It's hard to actually know though considering they all call each gay and stuff.

I would say they have an idea, but don't really think on it that much.

[Alexander]

I would guess that they suspect me. I'm not always the most straight acting person, especially when I'm excited. Not THAT way, sicko!

[ppreston9]

im in the closet, yet sometimes when the word gay comes up i can hear that slight giggle of awkwardness. idk if they know, but really im bi so unless a really good guy turned up im staying on the socially accepted straight date range.

[ccdd]

My friend, who is bi, when I told her, said that she had thought I might be but thought it rude to ask!

I think my mum might suspect but I don't know for sure that she does. (I hope she does, because that'll make it less of a shock when I come out!!)

[Wired106]

Only my best friend thought I was gay but he was perfectly okay with it he said but I told him that I was'nt. Good thing I did that because we got in a fight not too long ago and he told everyone he thought I was gay but luckily, I didn't say I was. Anyways, Nisomer I think your friend would like be ok if you told them even though this isnt really about that but he seems like hes cool and would accept it pretty easily. Im pretty good at hiding it myself, but my best friend noticed it because he like new every minute of my entire life.

[Jerr]

They know. I don't hide it but they aren't around many gays so when someone who is *snap snap* Fabulous. Comes along... they reconsider just how "gay" they think I am. lol


But I can turn the gay on em when I need... I remind them that because I'm gay I'm aloud to bitch slap a bitch without warning and without consequences... also as their Pimp... I can smack-a-hoe whenever I need... ALSO... The Twins clean my room so I can smack the cleaning ladies for not doing their work right... Juanita and Juanita... (They are twins so I call em the same thing when I pretend they are illegal Mexican cleaning ladies...)

[nisomer]

Haha nothin like brining back an old thread...I love these. It's really fun reading these because it seems like just yesterday when I posted this and had all these feelings and questions, but it was actually like almost 3 years ago!

Only my best friend thought I was gay but he was perfectly okay with it he said but I told him that I was'nt. Good thing I did that because we got in a fight not too long ago and he told everyone he thought I was gay but luckily, I didn't say I was. Anyways, Nisomer I think your friend would like be ok if you told them even though this isnt really about that but he seems like hes cool and would accept it pretty easily. Im pretty good at hiding it myself, but my best friend noticed it because he like new every minute of my entire life.

And thanks Wired for your concern haha...I came out to him like last year around October/November of 2006 I think, and yeah he was totally okay with it...one of the more supportive friends I'd say.

[The Enigmatic]

Sadly none of my friends think I'm gay, or at least they won't say they did. I keep asking them them if they ever suspected but they always say no. I must be terrible at being gay then. =P

[MarkNYC]

They set me up with him...

[Gamer am I]

I'm completely out and almost everyone knows that I'm gay, but if I never told them, they'd probably never guess.

[Ciel]

One of my friends definitely thinks I am considering she used to ask me if I was so often >.<
But other than her I don't think anyone else does...

[Muzzy]

hmm...I dont think so, but i'm not sure. One of my friends did start calling me "princess" last year but I think it was more of a joke then her actually knowing.