its hard enough to post this anonymous

[Anonymous]

so please no guessing even if its just in your heads. i don't need any sort of reputation.
:eusa_shhh
Okay I'm really depressed. I've got a ton of dormit addictions. I'm thinking of going back to one. I really can't function without it.
I'll think this out:
cutting-not gunna deal with that right now
choking-too risky
self-beatings-is never intense enough to work
little self-created accidents (fake razor cuts, provoked nosebleeds, fake nausea and induced vomiting ect)-too complicated
starvation-too noticed
purging-real dangerous

I'm just so depressed and i have no way to cope. :help: i know what will come of it but i'm almost willing to take the consequences. i feel so pathetically hopeless. :tears:
in fact i'm been putting off writing a thread for quite a while due to fear of a negative response of people.:icon_redf
i realize this is stupid but can't seem to cope without an addiction.
i'm really hurting. not sure why. just needing some coping skills

-Anonymously Anonymous

[biisme]

i'm not going to give you a negative reaction. i love you no matter who you are.

(*hug*) :kiss: (*hug*) :kiss: (*hug*) :kiss: (*hug*) :kiss:

i would say it sounds lik you are unable to cope with your feelings. i think you need to try and find a healthy outlet for them. is there something in your life that you're really passionate about?

also, it's possible that you want a little attention. i don't mean this in a bad way at all. please don't take it to mean i think you're melodramatic or a drama queen. i just mean, maybe you feel a little neglected and you need some love right now.

please don't take the risks. pay attention to the consequences. i would hate it if something were to happen to you.

i won't try and guess who you are, don't worry. but, if you ever need to talk, you can always message me.

lots of love(*hug*) :kiss: (*hug*) :kiss: (*hug*) :kiss:

[Anonymous]

biisme is right. you need to find something to keep your mind off of everything. i know that when my depression gets bad i keep myself busy with something i love, or just try to distract myself by running or something.

use what you love doing to cope with everything else. but it does sound like you need to seep out a therapist (nothing to be ashamed about at all) to talk about some of these problems with. they are completly confidental and will undoubtably help you immensly.

i hope it gets better :(

[Hollywood]

oh, that was me if the last one, by the way. silly me and this anonomyous posting ;)

[Samus610]

I agree with biisme. I've been through the same thing. I know it sucks. And you just want your depression to stop. You should do something that you're passionate about. Like me when I feel depressed I either write or I turn on my ipod and dance around my room or I sing. You should do something like that. Or maybe talk to one of your friends about it. That is also something I did. I would call him whenever I felt depressed and he would comfort me. I also agree that you maybe might feel neglected and that you need love. I'm also here if you need anyone to talk to. So message me if you need someone to talk to. And you need to keep in mind that we're all here for you and that we all love you(*hug*) .

[Gamer am I]

I'm no doctor, but it seems like your depression might be medical. Have you considered seeing a doctor about it? If that's not an option, then just find something that you feel passionate about, like painting or volunteering or whatever works for you, and try doing that to keep your mind off of whatever is making you depressed.

On that note, what exactly is making you depressed? You don't have to answer if you don't want to, but if it is something that you can help to change, then do so. If it isn't, then just try to reduce the effect it has on your life.

[Jim1454]

I don't know how old you are - but you don't pick and choose which of your addictions you want to go back to because you're not feeling well...

You surround yourself with people that know you and know your problems, and know that you want to act out on them, and you tell them everything you are feeling, and you let them help you to NOT act out on any of them.

You start to work with an addictions specialist. Someone that will help you deal with the addictions themselves, and deal with the underlying problems that are causing them.

I'm not hearing you contemplating any of those things in this post. As someone with an addiction it's VERY frustrating to read this kind of post. I know you're hurting, but for someone that has dealt with all of these things, you need to have developed some coping skills to get through them. Put them back to use! And if you don't have any - get involved in some kind of recovery program where you can develop them. These things will only get worse. They are not going to get better - unless you work on it! Caving in and starting one over again IS NOT the answer!!!

[Anonymous]

its me Anonymously Anonymous back again.

i'm doing alot better lately. it must just be seasonal depression as it seems just about everyone is depressed about now. i guess i don't have to have an addiction its that they let me focus on them instead of the real problem causing them.
i think this bought was triggered by an emotionally abusive parent. hopefully will finally be out of my life. i just kept getting tricked into visiting them. i think now i realize they will never change even when they promise to do so.

i realize addictions are bad. its like i'd addicted to addictions. they seem to run the show as much as they run in the family. i'll keep up. just needed a good break. hopefully soon as the holidays are over i can concentrate on my grades and bring them up to passing.

just not having the best time but the better times of the bad times. if that makes any sense

[biisme]

well, i'm glad you think you're doing better. and i'm sorry for the problems you have in your life.

just out of curiosity, have you ever tried writing stories about someone who has an addiction? if you write about how it affects their life, it makes it more real (and shocking) w/o actually doin it. maybe then you'll have extra strength to not acquire an addiction. just a suggestion.

anyway, glad it's better! and, i'm always here!

:kiss: (*hug*) :kiss:

[Anonymous]

its me Anonymously Anonymous back again.

i'm doing alot better lately. it must just be seasonal depression as it seems just about everyone is depressed about now. i guess i don't have to have an addiction its that they let me focus on them instead of the real problem causing them.
i think this bought was triggered by an emotionally abusive parent. hopefully will finally be out of my life. i just kept getting tricked into visiting them. i think now i realize they will never change even when they promise to do so.

i realize addictions are bad. its like i'd addicted to addictions. they seem to run the show as much as they run in the family. i'll keep up. just needed a good break. hopefully soon as the holidays are over i can concentrate on my grades and bring them up to passing.

just not having the best time but the better times of the bad times. if that makes any sense

OK... Now you're talking! Trying to understand the root cause is great recovery work. Knowing that the addiction isn't you - it's something that you need to deal with. The fact that you recognize the situation with your parent as a trigger shows that you know your behaviour is brought on by situations - that it isn't just 'something that you do'.

Good luck.