hawkeye
7th Apr 2005, 09:37 PM
I feel great right now! For the past few months, I've been going through a depression, as I notice seems to be attached to anyone who hasn't come out yet. I couldnt stand it anymore! I was slipping in school, I couldn't sleep, and I was always preoccupied. I felt like I just had to stop it there. A few weeks ago, I had told a friend, and it turned out very well (that story is already posted), but he lives a while away, and it had no lasting effect (probably because I dont get to talk to him every day, and i dont see him often at all). Last Tuesday I decided that I would tell my mom, but I decided this the previous night, and I stayed awake all night. Woops! oh well, the next morning I woke up early and told my mom that I had a problem, and that I wanted to stay home to talk to her; thank goodness she agreed! I ended up going to sleep for another 2 hours then I came down for breakfast and to tell her. That was an experiance I would like to never have again: I has trying to make oatmeal, shakeing, studdering, and all the while trying to tell my mom. Finaly when I told her, she said " oh honey, your just confused" and gave me a hug. that was the most meaningless hug I had ever had. She for some reason figured that she knows me better than I do! I guess that's a reaction thats to be expected though. anyways, It was a very awkward conversation, consisting of very short sentenses and long pauses in between. One of the questions she asked me was if I had told my dad (my parents are divorced and I live with my mom and step dad), I told her that I hadnt told my dad and that I sure as heck hadnt told my step dad (he always ripps on gays). Her response had put me at ease a little:"well, Don't think that he wouldn't accept you." I guess she was accepting everything then, thank goodness. She asked me if I wanted to see a consoler, and I guess it wouldnt be a bad idea. Like I said before, I did feel like I was in a depression, so we are going together in about a week. After that, I feel great! I love what hincoq said:
"I was alive before I came out, but I wasn't living."
I feel great now, like a new burst of energy. I've seen a lot of people say that the surefire way to tell parents is to tell them when you aren't dependant on them anymore, but thank goodness i told my mom earlier! (I'm only 16 now)
"I was alive before I came out, but I wasn't living."
I feel great now, like a new burst of energy. I've seen a lot of people say that the surefire way to tell parents is to tell them when you aren't dependant on them anymore, but thank goodness i told my mom earlier! (I'm only 16 now)