Thank you EC

[Grof142007]

Beware it long and confusing

It started when my dad woke me up at 7 telling me i had to drop him off at mac d and take my bro to school

well being woke up so late i had to rush and get ready which means i didnt have time to take a shower :dry:

then when we got the store he saw the bus he could have catch so he said pull in so i did. well he end up missing that bus and blame me which:***: me off even more but i got over that when i got to school. School was great we watch Sicko which i suggest u guys watch. and well when that was over my emotion were in angry mode for america being so poor when it come to health care

after picking my bro up from school i started getting a headache so ill thought ill go home and sleep for 2 hrs then do what ever was need to be done

well when i got home i was still feeling the emotion from the movie and i was listening to music my dad ask me a question ' how long u need to rest or whatever' i answer ill know when i wake up' then we got into this big fight he rip the coat i had on off me that got me PO so i was going to call the cops on him for i guess child abuse when he said ii ran up on him so he ran up on me and bump me into the wall with his body my mom was ready to throw down but i was like just wait till he hit me then he threw. so i gave in (i hate the fact that i did) and went and help. i was so PO i didnt care anymore about my life i was seriously going to KILL THAT MAN i figure i wouildnt get much ( now i know i would since im 18) i was going to either stab him in the heart or cut his thoart( so he would die instantly) and i was so mad tears keep falling from my face i only end up stoping them by hitting my self serveral time in the face( Tear meant he had won) while i was trying to get the tears to stop voice of EC Member starting popping in my head telling me that i shouldnt go throught with killing him ( EVen tho i wanted to)SO thanks guys

wierd thing is becky was the one that did it for me maybe cause she was the first and last person that pop in and that she care about all of us so much.(*hug*)

I really am glad i join this site as you just read it literally save me from doing something stupid

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I never had a good realtionshoip with my dad at once i thought it was cause we were so alike then i thought it was cause i was gay and was scared of his reaction now that i am out we had a good realtionship but today proves we will never ever get along i just hate him and will never get along with him to all the thing he done to my family it unforgivable.

and i VOW I will never ever Aplogize to him unless i am 100% in the wrong

Whew i been wanting to get hat off my chest since it happen 2hrs ago(for some reason my internet wasnt working "mom rip wire out of the wall outside by mistake and i just fixed it" Please read and give me ur thought on where i should go next. Was i in the wrong? man im still tired and would love to sleep but i GOT TO help him with the car :tantrum:

thnks for listening ugg dad just got back from the store

[Astaroth]

Well, I for one am glad you decided not to kill your dad! Anger is never an excuse for murder. I guess I'm confused as to what he was suddenly mad at you for? Sleeping? Anyway, maybe he's having a bad day...??? I know that's not much consolation. (*hug*)

[beckyg]

I DO care about you guys so much! Your letter made me cry. (again today!) I'm so glad you stopped from hurting your Dad. You know, no matter how stupid parents react, they are still your parents and doing something like that would torment you the rest of your life. Its never okay to solve problems with violence. Your dad has something eating away at him, big time and he's taking it out on you. Are you out to him? How did he take that? Do he and your mother get along well? How is his job situation? You just never know what sets some people off. Does he do this often?

[Temujin]

I had a similar experience with my dad about 8 months after I first came out to my parents. We had been in an argument over school, my performance, and my choice of major when my dad said somethnig that really pissed me off. I looked him in the eye and said "go f*** yourself". Ah, I was about your age back then, felt like I could take anything on and stand up to anyone. I found out that I can't stand up to my dad who is a mechanic and, as I found out the hard way, very, VERY strong. He grabbed me by the neck with one arm literally picking me up off the ground and slamming me against the wall like a rag doll. I had both of my hands wrapped around this massive arm that was choking me to death and all I could choke out was "Dad, please stop" over and over. He went into a short speech that started with "BOY...let me tell YOU something..." but I tuned the rest out trying to get free of his grip. It felt like an eternity went by before he let go and headed for the door giving me one more look as he did. All I remember beyond that is my mom shrilling at both of us as we left one after another. It took me a long time to get over that...long after the 3 hour trip back to my university.

All I can say is it gets better. My dad and I are closer now than we have ever been even though he "does not approve" of my sexuality. I'd say that we are truly friends and I feel like I can ask him for advice or how-to knowledge on anything. It's ok to feel like you do but don't act on impulse and realize that all things heal with time. Like Conan said, "that which does not kill us makes us stronger." Besides, if you think about it, rationalize it, you may realize that your dad loves you very much even after telling him you are gay because if he really wanted to he would break you like a dry twig. At least mine can. :icon_wink

[Grof142007]

I DO care about you guys so much! Your letter made me cry. (again today!) I'm so glad you stopped from hurting your Dad. You know, no matter how stupid parents react, they are still your parents and doing something like that would torment you the rest of your life. Its never okay to solve problems with violence. Your dad has something eating away at him, big time and he's taking it out on you. Are you out to him? How did he take that? Do he and your mother get along well? How is his job situation? You just never know what sets some people off. Does he do this often?


Yes i am out to him. He still accpets it and it compare it to cleaning my room. they do not get along at all they are always arguing and fighting. He has a good job but he does not make enough money to pay all the bills he usually doesnt do anything like this unless he be drinking. which is like every other weekend. i dont know but i think he might have been drinking

[Grof142007]

I had a similar experience with my dad about 8 months after I first came out to my parents. We had been in an argument over school, my performance, and my choice of major when my dad said somethnig that really pissed me off. I looked him in the eye and said "go f*** yourself". Ah, I was about your age back then, felt like I could take anything on and stand up to anyone. I found out that I can't stand up to my dad who is a mechanic and, as I found out the hard way, very, VERY strong. He grabbed me by the neck with one arm literally picking me up off the ground and slamming me against the wall like a rag doll. I had both of my hands wrapped around this massive arm that was choking me to death and all I could choke out was "Dad, please stop" over and over. He went into a short speech that started with "BOY...let me tell YOU something..." but I tuned the rest out trying to get free of his grip. It felt like an eternity went by before he let go and headed for the door giving me one more look as he did. All I remember beyond that is my mom shrilling at both of us as we left one after another. It took me a long time to get over that...long after the 3 hour trip back to my university.

All I can say is it gets better. My dad and I are closer now than we have ever been even though he "does not approve" of my sexuality. I'd say that we are truly friends and I feel like I can ask him for advice or how-to knowledge on anything. It's ok to feel like you do but don't act on impulse and realize that all things heal with time. Like Conan said, "that which does not kill us makes us stronger." Besides, if you think about it, rationalize it, you may realize that your dad loves you very much even after telling him you are gay because if he really wanted to he would break you like a dry twig. At least mine can. :icon_wink

I mean i think me standing up to him is a good thing cause i usually dont do it let me know i do have a backbone. and if would ever grab me like that i would have to do something before my mom would cause i know for 100% she WOULD TRY to kill him =) i would proably him in the nuts and call the cops =)(Cheap but effective)

[beckyg]

I DO care about you guys so much! Your letter made me cry. (again today!) I'm so glad you stopped from hurting your Dad. You know, no matter how stupid parents react, they are still your parents and doing something like that would torment you the rest of your life. Its never okay to solve problems with violence. Your dad has something eating away at him, big time and he's taking it out on you. Are you out to him? How did he take that? Do he and your mother get along well? How is his job situation? You just never know what sets some people off. Does he do this often?


Yes i am out to him. He still accpets it and it compare it to cleaning my room. they do not get along at all they are always arguing and fighting. He has a good job but he does not make enough money to pay all the bills he usually doesnt do anything like this unless he be drinking. which is like every other weekend. i dont know but i think he might have been drinking


It sounds like he's under quite a bit of stress then. STILL, its not okay to physically abuse your child. Maybe it would be good for you to get out of that house. Is there anyway you can do that? Is there somebody you can go stay with?

[Temujin]

I mean i think me standing up to him is a good thing cause i usually dont do it let me know i do have a backbone. and if would ever grab me like that i would have to do something before my mom would cause i know for 100% she WOULD TRY to kill him =) i would proably him in the nuts and call the cops =)(Cheap but effective)

Well, like Becky said, it sounds like your dad has other issues going on. Mine did too and I agree with what Becky said, he was taking his anger out on me just as yours is on you. It's painful to hear, but it's easier for your dad to be aggressive with you than with your mom. It's a male thing, I guess. It's good to stand your ground, but just know that there is an invisible line you will eventually cross like I did. The problem is you won't know until it's too late and you won't know what can happen until it does. Maybe you should talk to your mom in private, ask if there is anything you can do to help (assuming you want to). God knows all relationships require work and as the children mature it would serve them well to share the responsibility (emotionally, not so much financially). I'm sure there are loads of reputable therapists out there who wouldn't hesitate to disagree with me, but that's just been my experience.

[biisme]

I'm very glad that you did not decide to murder your father. That's a very final step and something that would change your life forever, as well as takin away someone else's, which is wrong in itself. Of course use self-defense, but don't go beyond that.

I hope that your dad manages to work out the issues it sounds like he has. How much longer do you think you will be living with him?