Same sex people holding hands in public !

I don't see much gay things in public anyways due to my location, but in school, this is exactly what happens. It seems that in my school lesbians are more accepted than gay guys. Part of this might be because there are a handful of them and only 1 or 2 gay guys. That's why I hope to become the first gay to be out in my grade next year!

 

Sexism.

Sexism is based on a belief that men, and thus, masculinity, are superior to women, and thus femininity. In men, homosexuality, and more specifically receiving anal sex, is considered to be 'feminine', because femininity is equated with submission. Thus, two men holding hands is considered to be a move towards the feminine, and a rejection of masculinity, which is offensive in the eyes of the sexist/homophobe.

When women display homosexuality, its considered 'masculine', which is good/less bad in the eyes of the sexist/homophobe.

 

I've seen girls who are just friends (and straight at that) walking around holding hands. In fact, I have a fair number of said friends who do that.

 

I see almost the exact opposite where I am, I rarely see girls holding hands, but I see a fair number of guys holding hands. I feel comfortable holding my boyfriend's hand in public. But I think it's mainly because of where I am, I go to a very liberal university very near to West Hollywood, LA's gay village. I think the masculinity/femininity thing is likely why it's more acceptable for women to hold hands than men. Also straight men almost never hold hands while straight girls do.

 

Think I've definitely seen more women than men holding hands. But often ones that I know aren't a couple. Agree with what's been said. I definitely think that within some circles it's accepted for women who are just friends to touch / hold hands where it just wouldn't happen with men.

Really gives me a bit of hope on the rare times where I do see two men/women just walking about the street that way. While it's tolerated by most in the city I live in there's no way it would happen in the area where I'm from only 20 miles or so away.

 

There's lots of lesbians here and I have seen people staring and what not at them, but I do kinda agree. I also live in Uk, my family are very homophobic and always comment on same sex couple's holding hands or showing affection in public. It saddens me. :icon_sad:
But I hardly see any gay men around here, we do have a pub just down the road though, But i find it annoying how some people don't care if girls are together but when guys then they just show hate or comment and it's just so rude uugh I hate it :tantrum:

 

I'm not sure but i love pda between homosexual couples it gives me hope.

 

Its probably because the people who dont want to accept that same sex couples can be in love, and for all the ignorant people out their its easier for them to convince them self that two women are just friends.

 

We dont usually hold hands in public. It's such a small town here. everyone knows everyone and thier buissness seriously. My partner is still known by she by some the people. They asked one day if I was his brother. Kinda shocked and taken back a step.. Then asked if I was his dad.. We were holding hands that day. Why does it have to be anything different then an actual couple. When I was known as lesbian I never got stared at but living as a man now I do.

 

Even in the modern time we live in, even in countries where gay rights are coming as far ahead as allowing same sex marriage to happen, there is still the underlining issue of people still having prejudice against gay men. It isn't as irrational as it was 50 years ago, but its still part of the demographic of straight people, mostly straight me, to see two gay men kissing or holding hands and to react to it negatively.

Some don't mean to, some even try to resist it, some just give in and throw insults our way, but fundamentally its still there under the surface.

Educating people about seeing us as normal will take more decades to make it a social norm, but hopefully in time it will. Hopefully without broadcasting shows like will and grace with it.

 

Straight women can hold hands in the US and no one blinks once, but two men? There was a picture posted on Facebook recently of two men, assumed to be a gay couple, holding hands, that drew so much homophobic hate from *mostly* young men that I forgot we were in 2013 altogether.

I think a part of it is cultural, since in foreign countries, it's perfectly acceptable for men to holds hands or give a light peck on the cheek. Here, the stigma against homosexuality, sexist norms, and male-male interaction mix to produce a strong adverse reaction from society.

Interesting how it's almost always the men who receive most violence and death threats, usually from other men, but in some cases, the law prohibits anything involving two men, even punishable by death in some cases. Such a strong double standard. It's clear that rejecting "masculinity" is a greater crime in society's eyes than rejecting "femininity".

 

Lesbianism is looked upon as more accepting simply because the average straight man is an asshole They would much rather have the image of two females having sex together than two males.

 

It's like "How dare two men not only refuse to kill one another over vagina, but reject it entirely!" You have crap like diva worship, jealousy and competition among gay men over "ownership" of a female friend, and internalized homophobia/sexism, which are related, though.

It's conditioned, I think, and have known many women who prefer a woman's body over a man's, aesthetically, who fall into the idea that female-female sex is gentle, loving, and sweet, while male-male is rough, animalistic, and violent. So it's not just straight men who are disgusted by the thought of two men together, and surprisingly, I've met more bisexual women and lesbians into fanfiction, slash, gay porn, etc...

 

I'm saving this. Its so spot on, and said much more eloquently than possible for myself if I do say!

You always have such useful things to say ^_^

Anyway, Its mostly non existant here, because people are afraid to hold hands 100%. If i get a boyfriend before i graduate, I'm gonna flaunt the shit out of him, that will be fun :3

It's off topic, but once My friends saw a gay(male) couple holding hands when we were out of state on a band-trip, and they FLIPPED SHIT! Like they pointed them out to me, and they were way more excited about it then I was... I'm still confused over the whole thing, but I basically said good, no one is staring at them TOO intensely, and they look cute together. I didn't look at them any different than any other couple at heart, and my friends thought i was "under-reacting" Isn't the point to be thought of as equal?
Its far from the topic, but do you guys ever feel like in places of acceptance, holding hands is more like a freak-show attraction to some people rather than treated as equal. It kind of pisses me off to see people I know fawning over them like they are the best thing in the world. I'm not complaining, its MUCH better than the reverse, but still.. idk haha
Sorry, that was way off topic, but I warned ya

 

I do notice this. My theory is that a lot of girls "act gay" with their best friends (sorry for being blunt, but there it is). But I wish it would change =\

 

Where I live you never see guys holding hands in public (even with girls its fairly uncommon)
Earlier this year for the 1st time (1st time on a 'normal' day - excluding stuff like going to pride) I saw 2 guys holding hands...but I wasn't in my area, instead I had went into the city (Denver). Last week I'd went to a fireworks show in the city, and afterwards saw 2 different guy couples holding hands.

--
I think what Hexagon (and others) have said pretty much sums up why its more acceptable for women...

 

I hate PDA in general. But yeah gay guys are usually hated more in public than lesbians.

 

in some cultures, like in the south of india, it's acceptable for men to hold hands and the opposite for women

 

Same here. I see loads of guys holding hands every day, but barely ever girls. I have no idea why that is, but I'm not complaining I think it's pretty cool.