I really hate how this happens to me so often yet I always fake a smile and pretend that everything ok when it's not. It sucks, I just want to be myself without getting asked bull:***: questions. It sucks that I filter what I say around my parents cause honestly I don't think I'm ready to be out to my parents yet. Sometimes what they say makes me think they'll never come around to accept it, let alone tolerate it. And sometimes I think I'm the only one that feels like this because everybody else seems so strong. I just want next month to come so I can leave for a couple of months, hopefully stop feeling like this (I'm dropping the news in a letter before I leave), be who I want to be and not just someone I am forced to be. I'm just done with it all...I can't stand it. On top of it all, I do not know where to go from here... And please spare me the typical "it will be alright shiz." I need to know it will actually be alright. I'm sorry to be dumping this on all of you. I just need comfort and all that jazz.
(*hug*) Ditto, I'm going through a somewhat same thing. My mom has no clue, and I've asked her opinion on gays, and it wasn't the most welcoming thing. She, as well as family and family friends often mention me getting girls, and at first it was funny, but now it's just pushing me to come out and tell them allready. And to add to injury, I've been feeling so hopessly alone and in need of a boyfriend. I really just want this all to end.
