Is surrogacy really a good idea?

I wish they could make artificial wombs already I wouldn't feel comfortable asking someone to go through that for me either, especially if I was paying.

 

Well, women aren't forced to do it so I don't think surrogacy is a real problem.
I think the reason why people sometimes rather choose surrogacy over adoption is because the surrogate mother normally can't change her mind after carrying the baby. There have been exceptions in which court has decided differently but normally it's "safer" for the parents because they feel like the child can't be taken away if the surrogate mother changes her mind.

 

I used to think surrogacy was going to be a great idea in the future, but after reading this thread, I think I've changed my mind. I never thought of it that way. Yeah, it's basically renting a woman's body, which does, in fact, sound unethical. It reminds me of getting a hooker, another instance in which you can pay for use of a woman's body. I guess it's not really comparable to prostitution, but it just reminded me of that.

 

Its not nearly so simple, and to be honest, the rest of your post contradicts the first line.

It is correct to say that people aren't (usually) physically forced to undergo surrogacy. However, there is more to it than that. Sometimes, like prostitution, people are forced to turn to it even thought they really don't want to, because they need the money to live.

The bolded bit is an excellent example of a way in which someone is forced to carry the baby. You've just said how no one is forced into it, but that is forcing.

 

I read somewhere that they officially created a test-tube baby ^)^ Which... is probably pretty awkward for the child, I mean, imagine knowing that you were born in a lab, although that would be pretty cool... I WANNA BE A TEST TUBE BABY!!!!

Wait.. sorry got off track, but yeah, that happened ^)^

Personally, I would never be a surrogate or have a surrogate child because
A: I'm afraid of pregnant people
and
B: There are so many kids in need of adoption, I just feel that is the way to go!

 

How is it forced when women do it voluntarily? They should know what they're getting themselves into and if they're willing to do it - what's the problem in that case? I can't see one. If there are financial problems, I get that women see themselves being forced to do drastic things but I doubt surrogacy is the first option women consider - as it lasts for 9 months!

 

If it is voluntary and the woman has no issue of giving up the said child, then I do not see the problem.

 

Adoption for me. Unless my (imaginary) partner would rather surrogate.

 

Wow, many misconceptions here that you have to tackle before talking about surrogacy.

1. Not all surrogates are paid, and in a lot of places its actually illegal to pay someone. You can only compensate for expenses like hospital bills and food.

2. A woman is not obligated to give up her baby. At any point of the process, even as the baby is being born, she can decide to not go through with the whole thing. There is nothing that anyone can do to stop it.

3. A lot of surrogates are family friends/members that are willing to help out.

4. There is a difference between traditional surrogates and gestational surrogates.


But yes, some cases are a bit controversial when it comes to ethics, but you can't speak of surrogacy in such general terms. You have to speak about it in a case by case.

 

I read through this thread and thought the same. The points Edend made are what I understood to be true. The surrogate is not paid usually, she is not bound to give the baby up and she can keep the child if she so wishes. It's no way a 'safer' route to getting a child.

This probably sounds old fashioned, but in all honesty, I think that's just something we have to accept. Biologically children are concieved via heterosexual intercourse and we cannot control that. Often I don't think we should, especially given the number of children in need of loving adoptive parents.

So, no, in my book it's adoption all the way.

 

There is a difference between doing something because you agreed to it, and doing something because you want to. Actually, a similar argument can be made about consent in sex. Just because someone says 'yes' doesn't mean they want to.

---------- Post added 28th Jul 2013 at 10:19 PM ----------

I'm curious. The term 'test tube baby' usually refers to a baby conceived artificially, doesn't it, rather than a baby carried to term artificially? I wasn't aware that a baby could yet be carried to term without the involvement of a natural womb.

 

I think surrogacy is an amazing process. I will probably do it someday. I can't get over that some of you are against using a process that's been around since the dawn of time, but a test tube artificial thing is totally fine? Creeps me out!

Anyways, I take issue with saying "some women don't do it voluntarily." I'm sure in some parts of the world that it probably happens, but if it's not voluntarily, it's probably not about surrogacy as much as it might be rape?

Also, a legal contract needs to be set up so the female doesn't try anything stupid.

The moral of the story? Like most everything, it's a great idea if you just do it right.

 

We should have a gender-based poll, I think.

 

They're not mutually-exclusive options. Just because you don't like surrogacy does not by default mean you like other forms of artificial infertilization.

Also, adoption.

If you read what other people posted, it's referring to "involuntary" as in "being in a position where you have very few options and the money associated with surrogacy suddenly becomes the best option". It's not a "rape" issue, so don't make it one (if anything, it's closer to prostitution).

Stupid like protecting the rights to her body?

 

You're not understanding me. I'd much rather go with a womb than a test tube, as in...growing the baby there. That sounds scary!

So prostitution is bad? See, I'm of the school that if you take control and do what you want, safely, it's okay. Wouldn't it be a feminist view that women should be able to do with their bodies what they want?

Like, stupid, as in, like, running away with the baby ? For real, I'm not an idiot. If it's your baby and you are footing the bill, you need to be protected. My god, if you think I'm "anti-women" then I'm just done with this site.

 

Woah now, no need to be all defensive. I never called (or even intentionally implied, to be honest) you "anti-women". The point I was mostly trying to get across was that word choice is a very important facet of communication, and some of the words you chose made your post come off very offensively.

I was also trying to clarify some of the misconceptions you seem to be holding (ex. like TheEdend mentioned, many surrogates are not paid and in some places it is illegal to pay for surrogacy).

 

What is generally referred to as a test tube baby still grows in a womb, as far as I know. It is just conceived artificially. Although I would be in favour of developing a way to carry the baby to term artificially, as I've mentioned before. If nothing else, it gives heterosexual couples the opportunity to have kids without requiring the woman to go through pregnancy and childbirth if she doesn't want to.

No, prostitution isn't bad, but pushing someone into a position where prostitution is their only or best option, is not. Prostitution, like surrogacy, shouldn't be a last resort, because that amounts to exploitation of a person's body.

I'm not even going to answer the last paragraph. Are you seriously advocating prosecuting someone for wanting to keep their baby?

 

Well, I guess it's a two way street because I took it that you were being rude...so yeah.

Maybe it's just frustration, but I've had a lot of problems with how I voice my opinions here and always getting called out. Makes me not want to say anything. I like to think I'm intelligent and I just don't really see any discrepancies here.

I could just be ignorant, but I don't see what's necessarily wrong with a woman having the pregnancy paid for, and maybe not receiving money? If it's mutually agreed upon....what's the problem? My friends have offered to carry my baby someday, and I'd definitely pay for the bills, but I doubt I'd pay them anything if I went that route. If we're all worried about saying things certain ways, then maybe we should rephrase everything and be VERY specific?