Okay, so this year I've decided to just not give a crap what anyone says, and I'm going to be openly lesbian at school. But there are some homophobes, and it's pretty much guaranteed I'll be harassed. So I need some smart and/or sarcastic retorts to being called "fag" "faggot" "dyke" and to other nasty remarks about my sexuality. I'm making a list.
Go all sarcastic and be like 'you're actually my dream girl' and stare like a lunatic. I'm so doing this.
It its a guy who isnt blessed in the looks department just thank him profusely for helping lesbian population growth, and tell him how much you appreciate all he is doing.
Be careful. Your safety needs to come first. No matter how safe you are insulting them at the time, the revenge can be pretty bad. My brother once insulted an idiot who threw food at him, and was bashed two days later after school, once they'd planned how to attack him. Always be careful.
If you find them looking at you, saying something to you, or just laughing at you, rip out some grass from the ground, eat it, chew it slowly and just stare at them with a crazy look. They won't mess with you anymore.
Homophobe: Ugh look at those lesbians/gays Me: At least they can get a gf/bf. Homophobe: Fag pda isn't cute Me:just like your face. Homophobe: I hate gays and lesbians and idgaf. Me: Don't go hating on yourself dude. Homophobe: The bible said that it's a sin. Me: So are your clothes. Homophobe: They just want to f*ck every single person in the world. Me: Just like you and your baby mama? Homophobe: Lesbians, just stop making out! Me: At least they have a girl to do that with. I hardly have to use these since my school is fairly accepting and homophobes are shunned, but they were very effective.
Normally I just go something along the lines of "Well your dad wasn't calling me that last night" or something that would only work in the situation, it's hard to explain but I am sass master
I would say live in the moment and say what you want but be a bit cautious about it because not only are you gay but you are also a woman and that is a huge target. No need to get hurt
I've never made a comeback or snappy comment on sexuality. Mostly, it was because I know how strongly I would have come back, and I didn't want to get myself in trouble. I have made snappy comebacks on other issues, and the person receiving it sort of backed off. But there was one time I was really tempted. The person did nothing wrong. I just wanted to shock this person. I was getting my car serviced. I was at a dealership I go to a lot. I went into the customer lounge to wait and get a cup of coffee. The lounge is near the showroom. A major football game was on. A salesman, who was pretty decent looking, came in and asked me "Who's quarterbacking?" I just said "Sorry, I just walked in, I don't know." What I wanted to say is: "How the f**k would I know?" or "I don't know, but I'd do him." I fully understood that his asking that innocuous question did not warrant such a harsh response but I do wonder how he would have reacted, especially to the second comeback, had I answered like this.
You could act like a sassy black woman (please don't take this as racist) and be all like, "Aw hell naw! You best be trippin' cause I gon' smack the straight outta all y'all bitches!" Yep, I'm probably going to hell for what I say.
Is it really worth the effort to even respond to homophobes? Just snap your finger or keep walking to show how insignificant they are. If you say much, it will just encourage them.
