Despite the fact I'm still in high school, and it'll be a LOONG time before I head to college, this topic has been hanging out in the back of my head for quite awhile now, and I think it'd be a good idea to seek some advice on the topic. So basically, my parents don't have the money to send me to one of those fancy-shmancy colleges out of state, so we kinda have to 'settle' for one of the more local colleges. I put 'settle' in quotes, because we aren't really losing anything out of this compromise. The college itself has a very competent education system and it'll save us a lot of money, and I am truly grateful of that. The only problem that comes into play is my taste in guys. I like 'em old. Super old. Like 35 or somethin'. (no, seriously) This must sound completely unrelated, and I totally understand, but just let me explain. The guys in that particular age group have more than likely graduated already. They probably have their own home and way of transportation (neither of which I'll have for awhile). Short story, they've moved on from college. I on the other hand would still be living with my parents for the next 2-4 years. I'd have to borrow my Dad's car quite a bit just to keep in touch with the guy. Alone time at my house would be a huge no-no. If I wanted to hang out at his house for the night, he'd have to be the one to give me a ride. Not to mention I'd have to keep my grades up, as well. Would he just get sick of it after awhile? To all you older gentlemen out there (as in anyone who's out of college) would this predicament annoy you at all? Would it be worth the trouble? Is this even an issue worth discussing? Please let me know. Also, it'd be really nice if you could avoid obvious questions such as, "why don't you just date someone your own age?" or something similar. I appreciate the concern, but you wouldn't be answering my question... ...plus it's just annoying...[/SIZE]
There are more 'older' (although I certainly wouldn't call 35 old) people in tertiary education than you think. When I was at university probably about 35-40% of students were 30+ years old. To answer your question, I've finished university (although I'm a fair bit below your target age ) and I'm not too keen on dating someone that is still in education - not for the reasons you listed, rather just because I'm past that stage in my life and would prefer my partner to be also.
There's good news for you! Many older people go to community college. They may be changing careers. They might be going for that degree that they put off. They might take classes in a special interest. There would probably be many men that would give you a ride. I would be very cautious. Try going out with a group or at least someone you know well. There are some nasty people pose as college students.
Really? I didn't know that. I genuinely thought people in that age group made up around 5% of those on campus. Shows how much I know. Thanks for the information. This is such a good point. This thought had crossed my mind, but I didn't think of writing it down. Good on you for enlightening me.
First, there's no need for "no, seriously." I was the same way in college. Not that there weren't decent looking guys, but if I was in my car, and I saw a good looking guy who was 35, be it in a suit or in a utility company repair truck, I noticed them. Still, it didn't affect where I chose to go to college. Most people in college were between 17 and 25. Anyone over 25 sort of stood out, if going for a bachelors degree. Here's the score: if you go to a big public school in a college town, you will NOT see much of the non-traditional age students you describe. If you go to a big public school in a city, or a suburb of a city, then you will see the non-traditional age students you describe. You will see even more age spread at a community college, since they offer the trades, too. So the humpy 35 year old stud who came back from the service and is studying to be an electronic tech or something might be at a community college. I'm trying to be funny. But, hey, that's not the way you pick a school. ---------- Post added 29th Aug 2013 at 05:13 PM ---------- Oh, come on, now. Haha.
You guys are funny. The biggest age spread downward for an "event" was 9 years. I was 35 and he was 26. I was at a gym. He was in college, taking longer to get through. He was a pleasant looking, slightly stocky, and shorter studious type with wire rim glasses. He kept the eye contact going. I was a little uncomfortable. He wasn't. He obviously wasn't a novice. The funniest thing I learned was this his roommate off campus was a girl at his university. That wasn't funny per se, but the fact that he took marching orders from her, as if they were in this codependent dominant and submissive kind of friendship, was odd. I avoided one other event like that. I was on a 3 hour drive that began at 10 pm and would end at 1 am. In the middle of this drive was a college town off the interstate and I was looking for coffee, so I asked where I could get coffee at someplace that was both open and not a chain. They told me of this place in the middle of the town. It was obvious that there were a lot of college kids in there, as well as some townies and people who didn't want to leave the area after graduating. I got my coffee and went to sit down. There was a guy around 22 or 23 at the next table, who was very clean cut and studying by himself, who kept looking in my direction, and NOT as in "you weirdo, what are you doing here?" I would have been 38 or 39. I wasn't going to go there. I got my coffee, went to my car, and kept driving home. At that point, I was really uncomfortable with the age spread, nor was I expecting anything like this to happen when I was just trying to avoid falling asleep at the wheel.
Are you sure about that? The college I'll be going to is REALLY small, just around the size of a really big high school. Totally didn't think of that, actually. I'm way too trusting in other people. How would I go about getting my friends to tag along? I guess you just introduce him to your group of friends over time... or something? What do you think?
If it's the size of a big high school, I would tread lightly. You know what they say about peeing in your own back yard. If you are not yet mature enough to handle and assess a situation, you should avoid it. I think you need to wait, mature, and become a legal adult, at the very least. When I was choosing a college and getting ready to go, I was more in angst over "college, wow," this sprawling place with all these buildings, and the nature of the academic competition I would be encountering. You go to college for a reason. The recreational stuff takes a back seat.
I actually don't know what they say about that. Could you elaborate? Yah, I agree, I think my hormones are doing the thinking for me tonight, so I apologize if I sound like a naive airhead at points. "I was more in angst over "college, wow,"" Haha, yah that totally describes what I'm being like right now. Totally agree with this, too. Don't worry, as I said in the original post, grades are number one priority, however it'd be really nice to let loose just a bit (socially, at least). Thanks for the advice though. It's really nice to be having this discussion, and your experience is making me think just a little bit differently. This is why I started the thread in the first place. Thanks a ton.
