Eye Contact

I am almost unable to make eye contact. I try to avoid it by staring at their nose, but people notice often. I don't know why I can't do it!!!! It's so frustrating!!! I don't get offended if people don't make eye contact because I know how much trouble I have with it.

 

I have the same problem being extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, presumably as part of social anxiety disorder, but it is something I'm working to overcome because I think I'd find it a bit weird if somebody was consistently avoiding eye contact with me.

 

I also get kinda uncomfortable making eye contact. It's sad though cus people think I do it because I'm not interested in what they are saying, but it's really just because I'm so self conscious and afraid.

 

I suggest reading some books about non-verbal communication.

when you stop and think about it it gets awkward.. this is because usually peoples eyes are constantly moving/shifting focus. there is eye contact, but not like.. staring.

I dont understand alot of this stuff instinctively, reading books about it has helped me communicate much more effectively. A good book will tell you how much is 'normal', how to use a little more than normal in a non-creepy way, etc.. also things like hand gestures, posture, shoulder stance, sitting stance...

I used to get very anxious about things like this, but since learning about it, my knowledge has made me more confident.

 

Yeah.. Still at that stage... Dunno if I'll get out of it. I'll make more and more eye contact if I can trust someone, and I KNOW I can trust them. But when you first meet me in person, I'll shake your hand, but my eye contact barely holds a second.

 

If the person I'm talking to doesn't make eye contact with me, it would probably make me feel a little uncomfortable.

 

I used to be like that, but nursing has helped because you literally don't have a choice because the patients won't trust you.
Just try and relax, it's easy to say , but if you don't thonk about it , it tends to happen naturally xxx

 

I was like this in my early to mid teens, probably 13 to 16, unless I knew the person. By my 20s, I stopped avoiding eye contact. Since then, I tend to make a lot of it.

Sure, a person feels vulnerable: "the eyes are the window to the soul."

 

I hardly ever make eye contact either. Or rather, I make eye contact at the wrong times, not looking at others when they are talking and when they aren't talking, I end up staring. Trying to figure them out, maybe.

You could try non-constant eye contact, not maintaining it all the time but at convenient times, at least for a start. Or you could also wear dark sunglasses so they can't see where you're looking :icon_wink

 

I like it when other people make eye contact while talking to me, although it doesn't offend me when they don't

I most usually make eye contact. My only problem is that when I'm speaking to my crush and I look in her eyes, I cannot suppress a smile. So, she actually calls me "smiley" now

 

I didn't have any problems with eye contact until last year... I had a teacher whose eyes would stare at mine like they were reading my mind. She was a really good teacher, my favorite. But, not only I couldn't make eye contact and I kept rolling my eyes like an idiot or staring at her nose/eyebrows, but I also felt somehow awkward and sometimes laughed in a silly way when she talked to me. I was afraid she might notice, or think I have some kind of psychological problem (I have anxiety disorder, anyway, but that was before I was diagnosed), or be offended, or think that I don't hear what she was saying. I couldn't even call her to ask a question about the lesson without blushing and feeling awkward.
Anyway, luckily I don't have this problem with other people.

 

Eh I got over it. Just look at their eyebrows or their forehead.

 

It makes me uncomfortable if someone DOESN'T make eye contact.

 

one more thing to add..

practise! some people are born with natural social skills, everyone is capable of developing them though. the only way to do it is practising though! you can't theorise your way to being a world class athlete any more than you can theorize your way to being a socialite.

often poor social skills are a result of social anxiety - you avoid situations, which then means you haven't developed skills through practise. it is hard and scary but you just have to keep throwing yourself into situations and trying, regardless of how badly it goes the first 10,000 times!

 

I used to avoid making eye contact, but I did change my ways eventually. However, in certain situations, like when meeting new people/talking to people I don't know very well, it's something that I still have to consciously think about. I just about have to count it out in my head - 2 seconds of eye contact, 4 seconds away, and repeat. If I stop thinking about it, I'll slip right back into my old ways of looking at anywhere but the other person's eyes.

 

Despite being extremely awkward and having really bad social anxiety, eye contact is easy for me. The reverse actually happens with me...if someone doesn't make eye contact with me, it makes me feel really self-conscious and extremely anxious, and a lot of thoughts start circulating through my head... "Is there something on my face?" "Am I just that ugly?" "Does this person hate me? They must hate me." Things like that.