Most Hurtful "Homophobic/Transphobic" Thing?

My parents and sister were incredibly trasnphobic before I came out to them. And yet they are completely open minded about gays and stuff.

Somethings they said about my friend's transgender boyfriend were: " It was wrong of you to call it her boyfriend, because it's not a boy. I found it kind of creepy when you said boyfriend, because it's her girlfriend. They are a lesbian couple not a straight couple. " - That was from my parents. My sister would say, after showing a picture of him to her "Oh my god is that a boy or a girl? " Then I say boy, but in a girl's body, she responds with "So it's a girl. Or an It because look at that you can't tell. "

Then another one she told me along with her fiance one night- "Does *enter his name here* have a vagina? If so then she is a girl. End of story. "

Needless to say I was terrified to come out to them after these comments, but once I did, they had nonstop apologies for what they had said and finally started calling my friend's boyfriend a he and not an it. They still call me she though so it annoys me :| but I do believe there's hope one day.

 

This hasn't happened to ME but I still think its serious enough to mention.. A gay kid at my high school was hospitalized after he had gotten attacked by 4 kids, they broke his left arm, his right leg, and after I got done talking to my friend about it the other day, a shattered left kneecap (Presumably from when he was getting smashed into a pillar) When he was taken to the ER they found a hairline fracture in his skull and he had went into shock and died for 12 seconds before the doctors shocked him back to life.

To this day I still have no clue what happened to the attackers, but I know one thing's for damn sure, I wouldn't want to touch that school with a 10-planet stick.

 

So far, being called a "dyke" by my grandmother. If she called me a faggot, I wouldn't bitch so much since it's validating, but no she went with that card.

 

There are some pretty terrible things that people say.

But I honestly think the worst is when people say "They don't exist" I've heard that so many times about transgender people, it's really hearbreaking to hear something like "You don't exist." It's basically saying "You're dead to me" or "You're better off dead, you freak"

 

Ryuichi, dude that's exactly how two of my room mates are. So like I'll be telling them anytime soon. They've also said that the whole thing about it was stupid and that those people just need help in the head. And I'm just sitting there like.... -_-

 

My parents said something pretty shocking things when I was a kid, the memories of which made me delay coming out to them. But they handled it pretty well to my surprise, aside from my father telling me I was disgusting.

The only time my sexuality ever proved to be a legitimate issue for someone was my senior year of high school. I had just gotten a car and a job at an animal hospital, and I had a friend named Patrick who lived about 4 houses down from me. He walked to and from school, and we weren't too close, but since I had a car and we lived on the same street I figured I would offer him rides home when I could, so I would always offer, and he would always accept. One day a couple months later, I was at work and I just happened to be walking inside when I saw a woman with a dog I recognized to be Patrick's dog, Lucy, walking up to the front of the clinic. So I went over to her assuming she was his mom, which she was, and I said "excuse me?" She turned around happily, then i said " hi, my name's Adam, I go to school with your son Patrick" and I put out my hand for her to shake, she looked me up and down, and her demeanor completely changed. She shook my hand with such obvious reluctance I didn't know what to do...so I kept talking and smiling, trying to sound as perky as possible, and she'd just stay quiet, looking me up and down, only briefly looking me in the eye once or twice. I then said "yeah, we live on the same street. I give Patrick a ride home from school sometimes if I see him walking." And she just says, "oh?"

Then there was an awkward silence, I pat lucy on the head and said "well I don't want to keep you from your appointment!" And she just walked away. She said NOTHING the entire time except "oh?" It was literally one of the most uncomfortable interactions I've ever had... Well, the next day after school I saw Patrick walking and I called out to him if he wanted a ride. He ignores me. I call again, he ignores me still. So I got up close to him in case he just couldn't hear me, ask him if he wants a ride, and he says "oh...no..my mom said she met you yesterday and I'm not allowed to be around you anymore because she got the feeling that you might be gay." And that was the last time I ever spoke to him. I was so hurt by that, that someone's intolerance could go so far as to target someone based purely off of speculation.

I still see that woman sitting in the lobby at work when she brings in their dog, and every time i do I want to walk up to her and say something. But then I don't because I know I wouldn't have a job after that. Besides, that was almost 4 years ago, I think its safe to say my window of opportunity has closed, Lol.

 

There are a lot of little comments that I've heard that have bothered me over the years. One that stuck with me is from high school. I was hanging out with these two girls and one had new running shoes. They were white and purple. Her friend said to her, "Purple's a lesbian color." And they both laughed. I felt so awkward around them after that. I never told them I was gay. Ok, that example is pretty tame. I'll tell you another one.

After I told a close friend in high school she was very uncomfortable. I confronted her later and told her I felt like she didn't accept me. She said she couldn't accept me for that because it was against her religion and then she turned around and walked away from me. That hurt, a lot. But in her defense she said (in a later conversation) that it was no worse than any other sexual sin and she added it was no worse than anything she was doing! We kinda smoothed things over and are still friends. But we never talk about my orientation today.

 

I get pretty upset when people use the word "tranny". I mean, sure, it's cool if we reclaim it, but if you're on the outside and want to call us that, it's offensive. It also bugs me when people tell me I'm never going to be a man because I don't have a dick or because I have a girly laugh. I mean, yeah, I do have a girly laugh, but have you heard Michael Symon laugh lately? I really hate, "You're a tomboy. You're just going through a phase". Who are they trying to convince? Me or them? It really bothers me when people point out little things that I do that are even remotely feminine and throw them in my face. I'm not a woman. I'm not going to be one because I never was one. Deal.

 

The way my grandmother talked about black people; I didn't dare ask her about gay folks. Grandma was dead when I came out to mom.

 

I've never really been called anything directly except for the occasional "fag" or "you're so gay". But those are thrown around daily so I don't really get offended by them, nor does anyone really do it because they think I'm gay. But there have been some times in my life when I have really been hurt. Like when some guys in my ski academy called me "the biggest fag in the academy". I don't know why they said it or if they were being serious. Still though, it hurt me. I used to be kinda halfish friends with them but realized they weren't really the crowd I wanted to hang out with. As fun as I thought it was to play sports with them and whatever. I just couldn't handle the whole straight guy "pack mentality" if you know what I mean. They could gang up on someone and bully them without thinking twice, and without feeling guilty afterwards either.

 

probably faggot. somebody called me that a few years ago, and i punched him in the face so many times that he got a concussion. my teachers even said he deserved it.

 

During senior year in auto tech class everyone surrounded me and called me a creepy freak for wearing a bra, headband, and makeup. They told me to stop staring at them or they'd hit me.

All of 14 them.

 

I'm not really out as trans yet, but most people have been relatively accepting of me when I do tell them. (But if I tell too many people, I'll never get to be stealth, since information spreads at a breakneck speed these days.)
My parents, however, have called me unnatural, insane, accused me of trying to throw away my life (which I'm trying not to do), and that I'll "always be a wimminz!1!"
Why do we need to label people, anyways? Can't we judge people by what they can do, and what their character is?

 

Homophobic: I hate when people mock me or yell things at me when I go out. It happens pretty frequently too. Worse than that is when people in my family try to find a cause and a cure...like who I want to be with means ANYthing to you.

Transphobic (no longer relevant but whaatever): Being told I looked masc, or was a freak, shemale weirdo etc. Or just the fundamental denial of my identity. Caused maajor mind fucking. Also, being fetishized and dehumanized (by men in particular).

 

Not really homophobic or transphobic matter, but still hurtful.
Recently I've been looking at Venn diagrams. I notice that when they draw the male and female categories, the circles are apart, in other words there is no intersection between them, and there is no "outside set" - basically everyone is only either male or female. The explanation? Because no "half male, half female" person exists, and there is no one who is not any of the two genders.

Something else is people who jump to conclusions, discriminating against the "different" people. All they say is, "That can't be real. You'll come round."

 

Basically being told that I didn't exist, or that I'm a freak of nature. Being erased because my gender isn't acknowledged by most cispeople I know, or they still (subconsciously) think of me as a female, rather than male or non-binary. Having other binary transgender people call out my nonbinary identity as a "copout."

And having people refuse to acknowledge and refer to me by my desired pronouns, and forcing me into female-exclusive spaces where I don't belong, essentially disrespecting me in every socially way possible.

 

It's kinda weird seeing all these responses you guys have posted. People insult me a lot or being gay but I am really not offended by them. Ive never had people say terrible things about me. I guess I'm kinda lucky because these things that have been said to you guys are just not right.

 

I haven't actually had anything said to me, being that like nobody knows i'm bi ahaha

but my dad did make some jokes about my brother, who's gay, it was something about teenage boys being filled with testosterone, "or estrogen in *bro name*'s case."

i didn't say anything i just got out of the car silently

 

Nothing yet because I'm not out to enough people. Hopefully we can get that changed within the next couple of months.

To be honest though, I think there are more obvious jokes people could make about me than about my sexuality.