I hate the word "gay"?

I used to hate the word. I grew up in a place where the word had nothing but negative connotations. I was once homophobic myself because everyone was. "That's so gay" "fag" ect. I've been working on accepting it. Give it some time. You might eventually like the word.

 

It rhymes with play, yay, hooray, and bidet! What's not to like? :eusa_danc

 

I used to not like the word gay either, but now, I have no problems with it. I guess it just depends on the person.

 

I don't like the word gay either:

1. A part of me resents that it got ripped away from meaning "happy." Well, I suppose it still does--but only in the dictionary. No sane person would use it casually in that context in this era.
2. I remember all too well how gay was used as a slur, starting in elementary school someplace.

However...while I'm not happy with gay, there really doesn't seem to be anything better. At least for guys. "Homosexual" is just too cold, too clinical sounding for me. Plus it's seems to be heavily used now by gay haters. And other words are too mired in being negative slurs.

 

I agree. There's no good word. The imagery I get with gay is too close to frolicking in a meadow in "The Sound of Music" or something. That's because the word, as initially defined, was often found in little kids' storybooks referring to merriment and amusement, so that's where my mind goes. So, if a person is asked, TV sitcom style, "Are you gayyyyy?" they can say "No, I'm really into guys," and they wouldn't be lying.

 

This is me all the way. I know it's my lingering homophobic residue (way ickier than anything else ) but gay still sounds weak and squishy to me. I'm alright with using the word in a non-derogatory way, but I still prefer "I like <insert same sex here>."

 

While I still find it hard to say sometimes (part of the reason I initially came out as bi), I actually like the word "gay". What's wrong with it being derived from a word for "happy"? "Gay" has never been purely innocent in that way anyway, the word has been associated with sexual licentiousness for centuries, and associated specifically with homosexuality since the 19th century.

But gays are supposed to be happy anyway, being gay should be more than about liking other guys, being gay should be fun.

The word I don't like is "homosexual", I would much rather be called "gay" than "homosexual".

But "gay" really is a pleasant word, try to change your thought processes and de-program yourself from that internalized homophobia, and you might grow to like it too.

 

I was wondering if I am a lesbian, and still am sometimes, and I hate the word "lesbian". It might be "internalized homophobia" for me... bad associations :/
but i like "gay"

 

In an informed conversation I'll try to use the word homosexual. In certain jokes I'll use the word fag, partly because it doesn't hurt anymore to hear it, and partly because I'm not going to be scared of words. I have heard enough gay men use the word "gay" to just be a little tired of it.

 

I went thru a drastic change in environment from one year to the next, where it's no longer "You're gay hahaha, you're a fag" (i can't stand this word still), but being around people who use the word like it's *normal* and respected. I was really shocked at first to see someone just "Yeah i'm gay" or "This is my gay friend." I had never even said the word, that's how taboo it was for so long. All the positive reinforcement allowed me to open up.

"Homosexual" seems drawn out, but i think it's often used cause the speaker just doesn't want to sound disrespectful, so i'm not going to object.

 

Gay really means 'Happy and Merry' or 'colourful', so it's ironic that you say that RainyViolinist.

 

I come from a non-english speaking country. So gay is a foreign word. So while it's not a vulgar word itself, when you translate it, it subconsciously becomes pretty vulgar, so I dislike it. But I prefer using it than any word from my mother language because it's the most formal-ish term to use when you want to refer to a homosexual person.

 

If I may ask, Noctem, what is your native language?

And Rakkaus:

I am working on it. More often than not now, when somebody is identified as gay, it makes me feel good rather than put off. I think the worst part is behind me actually, so that I see gay people as immediately relatable.

 

It's Greek

 

don't like it either. It came into play as a sideways euphemism for homosexual because, as a word in general usage, it passed the test on the Normativity Scale--which is one reason I don't like it.

I much prefer queer. Which is not clinical like homosexual, it's not apologetic or a sideways euphemism but smack in-your-face, and mostly, cause it's by far the most inclusive across tribes, except for assimilationists, who I have about as much in common with as I would a Wall Street banker... except I wouldn't wish damage to the assimilationists--unless they were Wall Street bankers.

 

i get that, i choke up on the word even during conversation that doesnt involve personal details. maybe its because i was too scared to say it to myself that its become a physical boundary, and im only just getting through it.

 

I agree, but that's probably because I only hear homophobes say it.

 

Well, another conundrum is the often asked question "straight or gay?" That is, straight implies linear and direct whereas, by default, gay would mean askew, relatively speaking, when paired that way, no? This is the thing - it's weird to embrace a word whose roots are clearly something else and whose etymology you don't know. When straights are at a party and laughing, aren't they gay too? How, when, and why was the word gay "converted" to imply homosexuality, especially among men?