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Going to things alone

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by method, Sep 23, 2013.

  1. method

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    alternate title: Table for one?

    What do you guys think about doing stuff that people often do with others, but on your own? e.g. eating at a restaurant, watching a movie, going to a concert..

    Right now, there's a play I wanna watch, and a musical which I also wanna hit up, but I have nobody to go with, and I'm not quite ready to be out and broadcast a message to my friends (screaming "gay" much? haha). I'm not a huge theatre fan, I'm just curious more than anything.

    I'm contemplating going alone, but the idea feels so unnatural and kinda depressing.

    I'm a fairly independent guy and enjoy my time alone, but I feel there are some things which you need someone to share it with. If that makes sense.
     
  2. LinkLarkin

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    Eating alone might look a bit sad haha. It's all right at a takeaway but maybe not a fancy restaurant.

    I went to a musical by myself once though. I don't think that's anything to be ashamed of at all. Musicals and movies, they're only there for a certain amount of time then they're gone, so you have to take the chance even if it means going by yourself. Shared experiences can be fun, but experiencing it by yourself has to be better than nothing.
     
  3. Sully

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    Hahaha I wish it wasn't weird :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: I've never really done it. However I'd happily go to the local aquarium by myself (I FREAKING LOVE THEM!), as a matter of fact I have. The best thing is you can do things in your own time!

    To be honest. I think you'd be best just asking some friends if they want to go to the theatre, it's really not that screaming...depending on the show...Kinky Boots might raise eyebrows...
     
  4. method

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    Ahh, definitely thinking I will bite the bullet on this one.

    When I went backpacking alone last year, I did a lot of stuff 'alone', which was awkward, but not so bad because of the anonymity. Actually, I kinda got a kick out of people pitying me lol. Doing the same thing at home though terrifies me, because I'd be so embarrassed to run into people I know and have to explain I couldn't find people to go with.

    Though, I did have one experience at a Jason Mraz concert alone, and ended up sitting next to me was a familiar girl from dance class who went alone too, and we commiserated together on being alone and had a blast at the same time. But I think I just got lucky that night haha.
     
  5. timo

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    I go to concerts alone quite often. Most of my friends don't share my musical taste, others have no money or can't make it on a certain night... So I can stay home and miss out on a great band who might not return to my country for the next few years, or go by myself and have a good night out. I usually pick the secodn one and I've never regretted it.

    So if I were you I'd just go. Give it a try :icon_bigg
     
  6. cscipio

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    I've done plenty of stuff alone. Eating, movies, et certera. Honestly, it's never bothered me one bit. If folks see you remember, you don't owe them an explanation anyhow.

    Them: Nice to see you! You here alone?
    You: Yep! Great show, isn't it?

    And the conversation moves forward.

    Also, FWIW, I don't think seeing something like a play or theater would be an "obviously" gay thing. Tell whomever you're asking that you've been curious about the arts and that one seemed like a pretty low key event to see.

    C
     
  7. Owen

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    I'm typing this while siting alone in a sit-down restaurant. I go out by myself about as often as I go out with other people, and I'm glad I do. There's nothing unnatural or depressing about getting to enjoy a meal out on your terms. :slight_smile:
     
  8. greatwhale

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    I go to plenty of things alone, it just doesn't bother me, and frankly, I need to get away from others, perhaps more often than most...
     
  9. MrBrightside

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    I go to the football alone every home game. Everyone knows i go alone, the people sat near me see me alone every second week. Its not a bad thing because i enjoy it, better than missing out entirely, but it will always be better with good company.
     
  10. Rakkaus

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    I went by myself to Vienna, Austria. The first night I was there I really panicked and felt lonely, I was afraid to even go eat. I finally ended up just buying a hot dog at a Würstelstand and eating it was I walked back to my hotel.

    But after that first night, I got accustomed to being by myself. I mapped out where I had to go and walked everywhere, I didn't even have a functioning cell phone, so I had to learn to be self-reliant and get myself out of any trouble I got into (and I did get lost many times and once had to deal with being followed by a crazy Indian guy demanding money too). But I went to museums, palaces, tours, excursions, a trip to Salzburg, all by myself. I did feel a little bit lonely, because everyone else around me seemed to be in couples or groups or families, but whatever, I learned to deal with it.

    At night I went to restaurants by myself, again I felt very self-conscious, but a few mugs of Austrian beer and I felt a bit relaxed. :beer: This one night I went to see a concert and a fancy dinner, I felt really nervous, but again, a few glasses of wine and I started to enjoy the night and the music. Of course I also went often to Viennese cafes, where it is perfectly normal to go by yourself, sip Melange and read newspapers (or use WiFi).

    It was actually really rewarding in retrospect, to know I could do all those things alone. The hardest part was doing all the travel stuff (packing, taking trains to get to the airport, getting through the security and all that, etc.) without anyone to help me
     
  11. LinkLarkin

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    Having said earlier that it might appear sad to eat by yourself. I've just remembered that I went to Tenerife alone earlier this year (in fact it was my lack of company there that led me to join EC in the first place), and although I met up with colleagues while I was there, I ate alone in the cafeteria every night (they preferred to buy their own food from the supermarket). I felt a bit silly eating alone when other people were in small groups, but it wasn't really a problem and I didn't feel too self conscious.
     
  12. greatwhale

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    Vienna is one of my favourite gay cities... :grin:, and Oh my God...the pastries!
     
  13. Van

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    I usually go to the movies on my own. Concerts, too. I don't really have any friends, so if I want to do something, I do it alone (most of the times). :slight_smile:
     
  14. stephenstills

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    I go out by myself pretty often and I've done a lot of travelling alone. There are of course certain activities that I enjoy even more in the company of friends, such as going to the movies or eating out, but if there's something I really want to do (a movie I really want to see, a concert I really want to attend, a craving for a specific dish, etc) and I find no one to get there with, I just go and do it. Surprisingly enough, I've made a few very good friends that way :lol:.
     
  15. blueberrymuffin

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    If going by social norm, lunch at an inexpensive restaurant alone is fine and common - diff schedules, eat quick and cheap and back to work. Likewise with a movie or play. It's not uncommon and again, friends are busy or uninterested so...you shouldn't go? Ridiculous. We can't talk during the performance anyway. Concerts or sport events on the other hand, are more social events. In a way going alone defeats the purpose, to some extent. You can still have fun but maybe not as *much*. You might catch shit for it too, especially from drunks.
     
  16. Miles16

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    Basically what Owen said. Nothing wrong with going out doing things alone - don't worry about people who look at you and think you're weird or feel bad for you...they're wasting their thoughts and time, no need to waste yours too. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  17. Northern

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    I don't think there is anything wrong with treating yourself to something nice :slight_smile:

    While whenever I see someone eating alone I for some reason always want to sit with them and say hi, but that's just me...
     
  18. Hrantou

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    I usually go shopping on my own. If I really want a new video game or book, or I need new clothes, I just go by myself. Its quicker because I can browse very fast and I can be in and out in a short time. Plus, I hate malls and stores (introverted) and my few friends like to shop for HOURS...so I just go by myself.

    Otherwise if there's nothing going on, I tend to just stay in. Its not rare for me to stay in for days at a time, and it doesn't bother me since I play games a lot. I guess you can call that doing something on your own.
     
  19. SimplyJay

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    I've gone to a movie by myself in the past...personally I'd rather just get the DVD & watch at home than go to one anyway though.

    On the rare times I go out to eat out its with family or friends .. wouldn't bother by myself (except for a fast food type place)

    Wouldn't have a problem going to a play by myself (but just in general I never have gone to a play LOL)

    Oh and I've gone to a PrideFest by myself multiple times
     
  20. chercheur

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    Ehh, I always do it :/ I moved to this area in May and STILL have zero friends (people here are just kindaa...). I was out all day today, getting coffee, lunch, going to the library and getting a haircut, and I was aall alone, and it was kinda like "daayyum, this is boring".

    It's not about what people think, for me. I don't give a fuuq what people think. It's just that stuffs less fun when you aren't hanging out with someone. I was REALLY bummed a week or two ago when I had to go to Pride alone, cause my date canceled on me very last minute (after being wishy washy about going all week) and then my (also gay) sister had to work. Soo jaah, it sucked going all by myself...