Green Eggs and Ham: The Ted Cruz Version

I am Ted, I have no heart
I think I'm smart, I play my part
This I know, for last night I put on a show
So most of you know...

I do not like Obamacare
I do not like it here nor there
I do not like it anywhere.
I do not like it on a train,
I do not like in in the rain.
I do not like it in a box
I would not give it to a fox.

It will not happen in your state
For it's those poor people I hate.
"Health care for everyone you say?"
Not if I get my way

No, Obamacare I do not like,
No coverage for Will or Mike
Not for kids who need their meds
And not for people sick in their beds
Not for people who need to eat
They can bend over and kiss my feet

Not for the baby with a hole in his heart
Because he can get a new one at Wal-Mart
None for the boy with cancer
"It's the parents' fault" is the answer.
No coverage for the girl who was hit by a bus
"It's your fault, not us."

If your plane crashes when you fly
Just do me a favor: hurry up and die
If you can't get insurance quick
Better hope you don't get sick

Medicare, it won't be there
It won't be here, it won't be there.
You won't have it anywhere

"It's your own fault," I say
When the government gives it to me anyway
My two little girls are set
But you're screwed if you're the rest

So suck it up and vote for me I say
Repeal Obamacare today
Take from millions their coverage away
Better hope you don't get sick someday.

I do not like Obamacare
I do not like it anywhere
I do not like it in a box
I do not like it with a fox
I do not like it in a house
I would not give it to a mouse
I do not like it here or there
I do not like it anywhere.

 

Thanks. This is what I did with my lunch hour today!

 

Contrary to popular belief, Congress is not exempt. Congress and their staffers have to get insurance, which is already provided to them as part of the job. From Politifact:

"Even a few sitting lawmakers have repeated this claim, but it’s not true. Congress is not exempt from Obamacare. Like everyone else, lawmakers are required to have health insurance. They’re also required to buy insurance through the marketplaces. The idea is to have lawmakers and their staff buy insurance the same way their uninsured constituents would so they understand what their constituents have to deal with. Most Americans who already get insurance through work are left alone under the law; members of Congress have insurance through work but are treated differently in this regard. Recently, a rule was added so that lawmakers’ could keep the traditional employer contribution to their coverage. But they weren’t exempt from requirements that other Americans face. We rated this claim False."

That's been the Republican strategy since Obama first declared for President is to have somebody start a chain email and repeat that lie over and over again.