Something that really annoys me about gay guys and lesbians

I had a weird thought this morning along the same lines.

One of my fav celebs is Jillian Michaels, who came out as bi some years ago, then came out as "married" to Heidi Rhodes and now has 2 kids with her. We call Jillian a lesbian, but she isnt. She is bi. She is an example of a bisexual woman who ended up with a woman.

Why is it we get angry with a bi woman married a man (Anna Paquin, Olivia Wilde) and complain that bi women always end up with men, but when a bisexual woman marries a woman we say she is a lesbian who is denying it. And then get upset she is calling herself bi.

Michelle Rodriguez is bi, and I'm betting she ends up with a woman...would we call her a lesbian? no she is bisexual, with apparently a preference for women, from her dating history.

Just a question. Its like we try to deny bisexuality exist, or use it to bash others and complain.

 

Im pretty sure i know what video you watched, and youve taken it the wrong way. That whole bunch of videos were done to purposely highlight the sillyness of such stereotypes

 

Then they did an abysmal job of making it satire. When I watched that video, it did make my blood boil.

 

Don't worry about it. Its no big deal. Don't give any meaning to those words. That is how I survived the past 17 years of my life. XD

I do understand your frustration though.

 

I know what you mean. And it's really frustrating, because in a way being bi is more confusing and difficult then being gay. It's like we're standing between two sides with both of them demanding that we finally make up our mind. I bet that almost every gay or lesbian knows how it feels when someone refuses to believe you and says that it's just a phase or some other crap. I don't get it why they're doing it to their fellow LGBTs...

 

Stupid people and ignorance. How can a gay man/woman cry that they are discriminated against, then turn around and tell a Bisexual person that he's not the same? Stupid.

Not everyone is like that though. Stick to the people who care about you and know you. Ignore the haters.

 

It was not the clearest.. it presumed prior knowledge of the attitudes/characters of the people involved.

 

I don't think bisexuals should be discriminated against and I don't think they're sluts or greedy or anything they mentioned.

I just think that their struggle is different from being homosexual, so I am a bit indifferent to them, and don't sympathize as much. But I don't think they're any more horny than me; I don't think many people are, or they are all closeted...etc,

 

I'm encouraged that someone who wasn't bi started this thread

 

gay biphobes are the worst

 

So true.

 

Totally That gives me hope.

 

Biphobia is obviously unacceptable from people of any orientation, but it is probably most painful for bi people to hear it from gays and lesbians, since they should know better.

But I'm not sure it's any worse than biphobia among straight people, especially against bi males. While a straight guy might just think it's hot or cute that his girlfriend is bi, straight women can be among the worst biphobes when it comes to dating bi men. Many women seem to think that a guy who possibly likes to take it up the ass could never possibly be 'man' enough for them, and are threatened by the idea of possibly having a boyfriend who is more feminine than they are. (Actually that latter point applies even to feminine straight men, I've read so many blog entries from women who break up with boyfriends just because the boyfriend has more beauty products than the woman does)

 

In my opinion, it's a tough stereotype that will only be remedied by subtle changes within the next few generations of LGBTQ individuals. It's like how older people are still prone to have racial and cultural prejudices. They can change how they behave, but in the end they can't help the way they were raised and subsequently how they think.

Personally, I do have bias against bisexuals, but I know it's purely a result of my own insecurities. I don't regard bisexuality as a phase, but part of me would still feel safer with another lesbian because I'm afraid that I would be physically unable to satisfy all of their needs (not just sexual). However, it would not stop me from dating a bisexual.

*before I'm bashed, please realize that I'm admitting my fault and simply trying to explain the cause for my thinking.

 

And let's not forget the transphobia in the LGBT community. Gay guys refuse to include me since "I'm not a real man". Makes me mad -_-

 

I am aware of that video; though I'm not sure how someone could take it literally unless they chose not to finish it, as the creator of the channel comes on at the end of all of those videos and talks about how all of that type of judgement should be removed from the gay community. She has also made one for what Lesbians think of Gay Men, and various others.

There is a plethora of judgement in the gay community coming from all sectors. I do not disagree with those who actively try to bring these issues to the forefront as I tend to agree with many of them; however, this idea that it is 'them against us' is growing unreasonable. I am very familiar with being stereotyped and generalized to the point that you feel disconnected from others, but it is pointless to address these issues with further generalizations.

The LGBTQ community is full of discrimination in the form of race, sex, and orientation. If we demonize each entire group who we feel has perpetuated the most negativity to another section or group, then we will find ourselves with few acquaintances. None of us would stand as innocent. While there is no doubt of the existence of these forms of hate, I would not better myself, or anyone else, to make threads about my frustrations and What annoys me about masculine men in the name of femmephobia, nor cisgender men and cisgender women in the name of transphobia.

We need to move out of this ideal that we can draws these lines on discrimination based on sexual, gender, or racial demographics because reality of it all is far less polarized. Consequently, when we draw these divides so narrowly, we only further the discrimination we already carry as we also peg those who have not done anything wrong as equally guilty by association.

 

Basically just treat everyone as individuals. Makes life so much easier.