Peeing in public sinks

I've had a strange urge to pee in public sinks and I've been doing it for years. It all began one day when I was in the men's room, and all the stalls were used, but I couldn't use the regular urinals as I hated to pee beside other men.

Well, the other guy left, but instead of using the urinal I got a crazy idea: I pissed in the sink. It felt so thrilling, and I went on with my business as usual. From then on, I've never pissed in a bathroom stall, just in the sink, and my fixation with it has intensified to the point that I wait till the bathroom is empty before urinating in the sink. Sometimes I even wait around ten minutes just to do it.

I do this in bathrooms for both genders, and while there's a much bigger risk if I were to get caught in the girl room, it doesn't derogate at all from my need to piss in public sinks. At first I enjoyed it because it made me feel so rebellious, but I was merely a teenager at the time and now I don't really know why I continue to do it.

It also seems impossible for me to do it in the toilet, as if I'm afraid to even approach the proper urinals cause it feels so perverse. At home or when I'm at someone else's house I never pee in the sink, just the toilet, but I can't bring myself to even enter a stall in public restroom anymore.

Somehow, I've managed to never get caught in this tacky act, although there were a couple of times were someone walked in just after I finished, so if I had taken a second longer they would've caught me. But those instances haven't made me fearful about urinating in sinks in the least, and if I were to desist from doing it I would feel stressed for the rest of the day, so the risk is worth it to me.

It's weird - I have no idea why I feel so compelled to pee in public sinks.

 

Actually I do it in women's restrooms too. I said that in the op.

 

Yes, I'm very passable, so I can easily go unnoticed in womens restrooms as well.

I'm a man and a woman, so whenever the need arises, I go wherever I have to, no matter what gender I am.

 

I'm not sure what's incredible about it... But thanks nonetheless

I also have to cross every bridge I see. This one time, I was driving down the street and this girl was in the passenger side. I was giving her a ride home since she didn't drive and it was late. Well, the street she lived on was chock-full of bridges and I must've passed like 5 of them before getting to her house. I parked the car, crossed all the bridges, and then took her home. She thought it was weird, but I couldn't continue driving without crossing the bridge.

Each time I saw one I turned off the car and parked it on the side of the road so I could walk across the bridge.

 

I don't know. Maybe it's some kind of disorder? I really can't grasp the insane urge to pee in public sinks.

 

You're right - I do like challenging norms, and I dare to be myself as a Bigender person. But when I pee in sinks, I don't view it that way.

If I did I would have no fears about getting caught. What I do doesn't really challenge anything since people don't see me do it. If I were doing it to challenge society then I'd say that, but I'm truly perplexed by the whole thing. Besides, peeing in sinks doesn't serve to challenge anything anyways.

It goes beyond my own personal freedom too. As I said if I don't do it I get enveloped with a sense of dread, but what I can't explain is why I feel it's necessary to do it in the first place. I don't think a counselor could help, and I don't consider this to be destructive behavior either. There's a difference between this and actively trying to hurt people, the latter which I wouldn't do.

It started off as a mischievous sort of thing but it's an entirely different thing now, something I do for whatever reason. Due to the intense anxiety I get if I don't do it...I really don't think I can stop.