American Indian Gays

[Paladin]

Well, here is where Paladin reveals a bit of his past, not because he wants to but because it is germane to this contribution on Amerind Homosexuality. That said, let me begin with my sojourn in Canada.

My native home is in New Hampshire, just a short distance from the northeastern part of Canada where my ancestral line starts over from France. I am, as I am distinguished here, from a Franco-American descent: a pure Canuck and Frog! However, at the time I was living and teaching in Florida. So, for an undisclosable reason (a polite way of saying "It's not any of your bloody business lads and lassies!"), I moved to Canada to an undisclosable part of it. It was not to Quebec, however.

There, after a while, I married a Native American widow with 8 kids (all sired by the same father), 6 boys from 4 to 12, and 2 girls from 9 to 11. The father was a German chap, whom I had met before he died. As the step-father, I remained with them until they were mostly grown-up. Why I left is undisclosable, but not lacking in honor. I became, during my stay, acquainted with the Amerinds in the community, accepted by them through the good graces of my Indian in-laws. The chief of the community was my wife's brother. I did not adopt the tribe; they adopted me. Actually, it was a mutual choice. I did a lot of research on the Amerinds of this area, even publishing a work for the Canadian government. That's enough of an introduction. On to the gist of this submission....

Of course, the kids were half Indian and half of German descent and recognized as "METIS" - a French word meaning "half." I got to know most of Indian boys in the community, and some of the girls too. Many of the kids were related to my stepchildren, and they frequented our home, ate with us, socialized with us. In short, I had not only married an Indian woman, I had married the whole tribal community! WHEW! that was an experience-and-a-half.

Today, gay Amerinds have "outed" themselves in some communities. Then, homosexual Amerinds were simply known only in the Native tribes. Yet, homosexuality was never truly condemned by the Natives themselves, so there was a lot of gay stuff going on. Native Americans in Canada, the U.S. and in Central & South American countries could be gay without being stigmatized because many Native people, all over the map, regarded gayness not as some deficiency in human behavior but, actually, a gift from a spiritual plane. The literature on homosexuality in Amerind tribes called the boys (and girls sometimes) and the men and women "berdaches." This term was mostly used for the men, but also for the women. The Amerind cultures not only tolerated the berdaches but held them as being sacred people who were often leaders in their communities, such as medicine men (and women), sages, and teachers to the young. Something, as we know as intolerable in modern communities. Our ignorance here is tantamount to being a real crime against homosexuals and, even pedophiles. The wisdom of the Amerind people deduced that gays were an extraordinary sex of their own, blessed by the Great Grandfather in the Sky, and must, then, be revered for their sacredness and their services to their Native communities. How marvelous would that be if only the non-Native populations of the Americas adopted that point of view of our Native American friends!

Although I was married, my wife knew of my predilections. That I had a healthy dose of gayness in my white blood. She knew that I had Indian guys as close friends, and she knew that some of them were buddy-buddy with me, having seen some hints in that direction. I talked with her about it and we agreed, because we cared for one another, that it was O.K. provided that we remained loyal to each other and that I did not have the same feelings for women (that's where her jealousy could have caused me to lose my "scalp," so to speak). I admire our Native people. They have been given short-shrift by non-Amerinds. Ther are many short-comings that have been attributed to American Natives, and a lot of nonsense has been spoken about them. I loved my wife, my adopted kids, and my adopted Native friends. I could walk through the Indian village without getting my throat cut because I was a White guy, whereas White government people took a chance going their at sunsets. Yes, there were Indian men who played around sexually with Indian kids below the age of a so-called consent, but Native people, if they thought any of the tribal kids were in danger from cruel predators, handled the problem in their own way. Indian folks do not ordinarily report anything to police, as my kids called the R.C.M.P. ("Royal Canadian Mounted Police) Rotten Carrots and Mashed Potatoes, which was a mild descriptive term of that authority, believe me!

If some of you are interested, there is a marvelous book written by a gay White man who lived, loved, and sexed-around with Native American males. It's volume worth reading because it is both an academic study and a personal rendition of the experiences. It is titled "THE SPIRIT AND THE FLESH: Sexual Diversity in American Indian Culture" by Walter L. Williams. Bacon Press/Boston. 1992 rev.ed. This is for readers with some academic undergraduate backgrounds. For young teen-aged boys & girls, I suggest that they read a small novel, written in 1953 by Conrad Richter titled "THE LIGHT IN THE FOREST." This can be read by children from 9 and up. I read it, and I liked it. It tells of a White boy captured by Native Americans, and who becomes so "Indian" himself that he learns to despise his White relatives when he is summarily returned to them. Well, you who have discovered your orientations and show much pride therein, I hope that I have not bored you with this account, but I felt morally compelled to tell you about it. Love to my Native American friends, and now to the nice queer folks on this site - a site that will ot only bring people together but, also, a site that will dramatize the cause for this community of people. Love to you all. PALADIN

[beckyg]

We had an Anthropoligist come speak at PFLAG one time about how different cultures view homosexuality. It was quite interesting. In the United States and in other cultures as well we see gender as very cut and dry....man and woman. There is nothing in between and our abilities to love someone of our own sex are stricly forbidden.

[Gumtree]

Well i just emailed both the novel names to UniReps and should receive them in a few
weeks

No culture has EVER fascinated, attracted and interested me as much as native Americans. Call it a fetish if you chose but every one of my fantasies seem to turn any man whether i know what they look like or i am making it up in my mind into an American Indian pretty quick :P

Mmm yummy...

Oops getting carried away.

Despite the different in the years spent i have experienced a very similar situation with the Aboriginal people of Australia. Where most white people would fear to go at night and where the white constitution seems to have no authority I became oddly accepted and welcomed.

I suppose my foreign appearance played a roll in it. My dad does not know anything of his side of the families ancestry; except that we originate from a traveling circus that was Gyptian (no, not Egyptian) and Hispanic based.

OT Many people mistake me for having an Asian background, mainly because of my eye shape and very thick straight black hair. Yes at the same time i have yellow eyes and olive skin?

Mother was born in Holland, Deutsch and Belgium parents. Father's other side is Hispanic and Deutsch.

If anyone has any theories as to what i might be, please share!

I seemed to have been adopted by a community and after learning many of their beliefs I was astounded by the openness and acceptance of different inclinations and even more so, how common they were.

Unfortunately this is most definitely NOT the case with many aboriginal communities.

[Hepcat]

That was very interesting to read. Thanks for posting it.

[nanoman]

Thanks for the post! It was a good read.

[InaRut]

AH That was quite a nice read. It's good to hear that at least some cultures in our world don't turn their nose up at homosexuality. I always wondered what the natives thought of it, but I always sorta knew that they were comfortable with male to male, and female to female love.

[Tim]

Of course, the kids were half Indian and half of German descent and recognized as "METIS" - a French word meaning "half."

Hmm... I'm half german and pretty much have native american o.O

But yea, thanks for the post, was very interesting to read

[Paladin]

TO GUMTREE: It sounds, from the info you provided, that you may be of Romanian descent; that is Gypsy, or Rom. The "Gypsies," as they called themselves were originally from India, and had no connections whatsover with Egypt. You would be Aryan, and possibly Romanian, if you provided the correct info. You can contact me if you like, I'd be glad to assist. I can also let you know more about American Indians. Paladin

[Paladin]

To all the others who liked the post: Friends, I would be happy and priviledged to answer any questions you may have for me about this topic. Paladin

[Beebo]

I think what you did there is so brave. Emersing yourself into a Native American community. Wow. Talk about breaking down cultural barriers.

I do have a few questions though.

How did you meet your wife, since she was probably a permanent resident of the reserve?

Did you experience any prejudice living as a white man in a Native American community? If yes, then did you ever find yourself in a dangerous situation?

[Paladin]

Michael... While living in Florida and teachig at a private grade school, where I was the head of the sciene curriculum, I managed to fire-up some of the kids at the school to accompany me on a road trip one summer; and, the second year I repeated another trip. The 1st one was a trip (station-wagon & trailer, my 17 yr. old nephew to help drive, and five boys) through eastern Canada (New Brunswick, Nova Scotia) and leaving car behind, embarked on a French liner from northern Nova Scotia and over the North Atlantic to the French isles of St. Pierre & Miqulon to stay there for a week. Since the trrip turned out so successfully, I got another group of boys (some from the school and a couple from the Science Center in the nearby city, where I was a volunteer science guy, for the 2nd trip.

This trip took us through a number of Canadian Provinces, and in one place in Canada I stopped at a small restaurant to get the kids some drinks. It was at this restaurant that I met the owner and his wife (my future wife). Played chess with this German chap and beat him. He was so impressed that he did not charge any of us for the drinks. He told me that he was going for a heart operation in a large city to the south, and I told him I would stop by to see him on the way back. Well we went to the end of the trip I had planned and was on our way back. I did stop at the hospital and saw the guy again. He had just had his operation and was walking about in recovery. On our return voyage we went into Mexico, then through Texas, the southern states, & Gulf of Mexico to get back to Florida. I did not make much money on this trip, but it was a grand voyage just the same: 20,000 miles round trip and 7 weeks of going through many states, provinces and parts of Mexico. I was so fatigued, but it was worth it.

I got back to Florida and decided to take the next year off to write, giving up my teaching job. I wrote to the German chap, but got a return letter from his wife saying that he had died a few days after he returned home. She was devasted! They owned not only the restaurant, but a taxi service also. She was in a funk as to how to manage the enterprise, and to take care of all her kids. I wrote back to her and, since I was not going to go back to teaching, I told her I could go back to Canada and give her a hand until things were running well again. She accepted my proposal and sent me the money for the plane tickets. Off I went, stayed there a bit longer than planned - and you know the rest. How's that for a capsule tale? I left out many details and the exciting places we visited for both of these voyages. So my touring camp's 2 yrs. were successful, and I probably could have raked-in a lot of dough if I had kept the business up, but what the heh! Paladin P.S. I want to know if everything is O.K. with you - Please.

[Beebo]

You are so incredibly fascinating. Your life is... amazing. You are amazing. EC is so lucky to have such an ingenious teacher.

[Paladin]

Gumtree: I sent your answer to your personal site, but the address did not turn "blue" which I gave you. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roma_people#Spain... you may have to copy it from here, or go to "gypsies" on google. Let me know if you succeed, OK - Paladin (Sent 11:00 a.m. EDT from New Hampshire in USA // 6/9/08

[Beebo]

You never answered my second question .

[Paladin]

Beebo: What last question? Paladin

[Beebo]

Originally Posted by Beebo

I think what you did there is so brave. Emersing yourself into a Native American community. Wow. Talk about breaking down cultural barriers.

I do have a few questions though.

How did you meet your wife, since she was probably a permanent resident of the reserve?

Did you experience any prejudice living as a white man in a Native American community? If yes, then did you ever find yourself in a dangerous situation?

the bolded stuff.

[Paladin]

Beebo: No, I was never in any danger, either from the Native people or the Whites. Prejudice was not strongly apparent, for other Whites and Native unions were not rare. The prejudice was not aimed at me so much, but aimed at the Native people themselves, from Whites of course. But some Native people, themselves, showed a degree of prejudice against Whites for marrying Natives; feeling, like some Whites did, that mixing "races," "created half-breeds," which diluted the blood lines. (Amerinds are not excluded from prejudicial views. "Race" is a misnomer, Homo sapien includes all peoples as equally endowed biologically by Nature).

However, one event conspired against my feelings that "hard" prejudice did not exist in CANADA. My wife, and two of my boys, accompanied me to a city within the province (which province? None of your business!), where I had already made reservations for all of us for a suite (money was easy at that time for our family) that was pretty fancy. I went into the lobby to register, the registry was in front of me to sign, then in pops in my kids & wife! Immediately, the clerk (who was also the asst. manager) saw them coming in, and my littlest boy ran up to me and grabbed one of my legs and shouted "Daddy!" At that moment, the clerk said "Oh, Mr. _______, we're all booked up for 3 days, and when you made your reservations, one of our clerks mistakenly placed your reservation for next week." This was undiluted bullshit, and I knew it! I was not going to argue the point, for the guy did not actually say anything about my Amerindian wife and our paler-brown kids. So, I called around and found a-lesser-than-dignified- place to haul our butts to, but still a decent place that did not cull the "colored folks" from the "pure white breeds" that dominated the province. I was very angry, but to save my family from greater shame, we took our new qurters (actually very well appointed, but for less of the Queen's money), and I got smashed drinking some excellent wine from Oporto Portugal (Red Port, that is!) The kids, meanwhile went to the movies with my wife, and the rest of our stay was A-OK. Does this answer satisfy your question, Mike? Paladin

Originally Posted by Beebo

You are so incredibly fascinating. Your life is... amazing. You are amazing. EC is so lucky to have such an ingenious teacher.

I'd have to agree!

[Beebo]

Yes. That answers my question.

Story time.

The reason I asked, is because I used to go visit my grandparents up in a town called Longlac (a little town way up north in Ontario). When I went there, we would always be warned about the natives (these are not my words), because "they often grafitied and vandalised, and caused problems".

Longlac is a town of about 1000 people about 18 hours north from where I live. There were many reserves surrounding it. And the people of the town did have prejudice against the Natives. I was young, maybe 5 or 6, and me and my cousins were at the local park, and a group of Native American Youth came up to us and started picking on us; 6 of them, and they were all about 10-12 years old. We had the same numbers, but we were all younger, and unsuspecting. They came and started bullying us, most of my cousins ran off, but I stayed, because they had cornered my cousin, Killi, and she was carrying my baby cousin, Alaina. I ended up getting punched in the face, but Killi and Alaina got away unharmed.

It was probably the most frightening experience of my youth, and I definatly had some prejudices of my own against the Native American people after that. (Mostly just that I was scared of them). But I have grown since then, and I realised that those kids were probably just bullies, and they probably had some frustration with the white people of the town (which is understandable because the white people treated them only a few notches above pond scum).

That is why I asked, because honestly, I would still be a little sketched out about going into a reserve on my own (my dad still tells me I would be killed [and what you said about how they "handled the problem in their own way"]). That is why I called you brave. I hope you weren't offended by me asking you that last question.

[Paladin]

Nope. Beebo, I was placed upon this lovely orb by the Spirits of Nature, commanding me to do what I could to bring harmony to a fractured world. Well, maybe not quite! Actually the gods were fed-up with my bitching about their fornicating here-and-there, up-and-down, and side-by-side so that they said: "Go, thou, O Shit-Head of Blond Fluff, Hazel Eyes, Limbs of Ivory, and really cute Dinky, and Wake up the People so that they may know that We love them in spite of their great IGNORANCE." So, Beepo, I dispose of offensive remarks like water that comes off a duck's back. Love, Paladin