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Spanking/Corporal Punishment---Do you support it?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by HuskyPup, Nov 5, 2013.

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Spanking/Corporal Punishment---Do you support it?

  1. No, not at home, and not in school.

    61.7%
  2. Yes, at home only.

    31.8%
  3. Yes, at school only.

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. Yes, at both home and school.

    6.5%
  1. HuskyPup

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    Should parents be allowed to spank or physically discipline their kids? How about schools?

    I say no to either, as I see them as abusive, and ineffective.
     
  2. chercheur

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    No. I think striking a child is abusive, and doesn't correct problems but creates more. My parents spanked us growing up. My mom would use spoons, spatulas, even current rods and things like that. They even had a piece of wood they used for a while, which we drew an angry face on (until my dad broke it on my sister...it was pretty thick, too). They actually had all sorts of physical punishment, including a straight jacket hold where they put one arm around our arms and a hand over our faces (soo claustrophobia inducing).

    Sorry, bad memories. I just think harming your children physically is sadistic, abusive and scarring. I'm not sure it should be outlawed...but to me it could easily be considered to constitute child abuse.
     
  3. RainyViolinist

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    Personally, I belive that in limited amounts, parental spanking can help discipline kids. I don't schools should though, as corporal punishment is more of something a parent should carry out. My brother, if he wasn't slapped around from time to time, would be out of control. He already got suspended in first grade for threatening someone (smh, a whole story unto its own). He would quite literally have no sense of boundaries. He's more composed now, but I worry what would happen if my parents didn't keep with corporal punishment with him, as there are times when he doesn't realize that he crossed a line.
     
  4. edgy

    edgy Guest

    there's time to physically chastise and mentally. Spanking should not be done with a hand. hands are for loving and a child shouldn't have fear of their parents hands. What they should fear is a look, a look that they got when they were younger usually before they dealt with a "rod."
     
  5. Sully

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    No, in both situations. To me it always seems that parents hit children when they're completely over whelmed and have lost the plot, not just to discipline kids, I think the parents at that time just have no idea what else to do. I see it as merely a release of parental frustration. Not okay.
     
  6. Austin

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    One could argue that sitting them in time out or taking away a privilege could be mentally abusing them.......
     
  7. Hexagon

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    No. Absolutely, completely no in all cases. Corporal punishment is child abuse, and in any case, morality means little if its as a result of not wanting to be hit.
     
  8. sam the man

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    No to both. Firstly, it's a questionable behaviour (imo) and if you send out the message that it's acceptable then inevitably more people will do it and it gives people more excuses to beat children. Not only this, but however sensible the population is there will always be cases where it's taken too far and kids are hospitalised or even killed. Of course the beating of children will happen whatever society says about it, but I think if we encourage it it'd be too rampant. Perhaps it should be considered child abuse to draw a clear line under what degree of punishment should be accepted.

    It's counterproductive as well. If anything I'm pretty convinced it's something that'd cause more problems than solutions. I know I'd be pretty resentful of authority figures if they, instead of doing the right thing and trying to enlighten me, sanction me or explain my wrongdoing- in other words try to help me- took the easy route of whipping me back into line no questions asked. I think it develops more problems than solutions like that, because children often grow resentful or mistrustful of others based on that kind of thing. Coerce or threaten someone, doesn't matter who or how, and they'll have less trust or respect for you, and those are two qualities we need more of.

    I reckon the real problem with wayward children lies with the values they're taught and the parenting. Corporal punishment is just an easy path, a patchwork solution to a deeper rooted problem. Not quite sure what I think on this, but I reckon sometimes children should be allowed to fail rather than punished. That way if they begin failing they might see that they're the only responsible person. But idk how well that'd work with kids. Anyway, I'm stopping the tangent there :grin:
     
  9. justjade

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    I was spanked as a kid, and all it did was make me resent and fear my dad. Parents need to be willing to learn what's actually going on and why their children behave the way they do instead of hitting them.
     
  10. FreeFlow9917

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    Well moderation is a key. It's called tough love, and it's used as a parenting tactic to show kids you'll get hit for doing something wrong but you got to imagine yourself in the eyes of a parent. What if they didn't listen to you at all and disobeyed your commands, you let them walk over you and coddle them. Taking something away will not solve all cases and neither will spanking. If you take something away, they will sometimes act out being sorry for doing what they did and keep doing it because they know they can. If you spank them, it'll make them cry (I know my little brother did, he wasn't spanked too hard though, never ever hard) but they'll understand that when they do something against the rules and spiral out of control, they'll know the difference between wrong and right. Thus, they'll be less likely to act out and you can resume life as a gaily and resume life. But don't discipline too often as it'll backfire. This is my view as a brother who's seen spanking as a tough love.


    My perspective = fuck no, not at school, and not because you're just angry.
     
  11. gravechild

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    Just about everything is counted as "abuse" these days, which is ridiculous. Our parents didn't have to hit us, because a warning was enough to let us know if we kept it up, they would physically discipline us. It was strict, but fair, and that's what should matter, in the end. An abusive and cruel parent is not the same as one who is willing to enforce boundaries.
     
  12. FreeFlow9917

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    Moderation to others, i mean what are you going to do if your kid spits on you, hits you and calls you names. When you hold yourself back and maybe yell at the kid, they made do nothing, they may hit, they may cry. If they keep hitting you and spitting you, you need to show them that's wrong, give them a time out, but in the end the kid will figure out what you're doing. Hitting is bad in general yes, but a light slap that only stings a little, that'll work, not like flat out fucking belt marks on the body, but light tapping.
     
  13. As part of a minority, I was beaten by my parents. That resulted me growing up as a violent kid.

    I'm against it now because corporal punishment teaches young minds that violence solves problems, and we all know that it doesn't work.

    Yes, it does keep kids from doing things bad again, like it did for me, but it caused me to live in fear.

    However, I do believe that kids deserve it sometimes. What are you going to do if your kid hits you? Like that viral video from dr.Phil.
     
    #13 anthonythegamer, Nov 5, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 5, 2013
  14. Maddy

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    As a teacher, the idea of physically disciplining my students is abhorrent.

    And I can see how parents get to a stage where it seems like spanking is the only way to get through to a child, but if I ever become a parent, I don't intend to spank my child. It seems to me that it teaches kids "don't do this because if you do I'll hurt you", not "don't do this because it hurts other people/it's dangerous/it's rude/etc."
     
  15. Hrantou

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    Let me tell you that the only reason me and my sisters turned out as good as we did is because we got spanked and slapped when we did stupid sh*t. I'm sorry, but this "sit in the corner for time out" rarely does any good (that I've seen) I'm not saying to walk around hitting them for no reason, but when they do something stupid and bad, then yes spanking and slapping is sometimes needed to teach them a lesson.

    I think it takes a special kind of person though. That's the best way I can describe it. I realize that for some people it teaches them to fear their parents, but I never feared mine. The only thing I ever feared was getting punished for something I know that is wrong. And let tell you, sitting in the corner for time out didn't teach me to be afraid of doing the wrong thing. It was the fear of getting spanked or slapped for it.

    Go ahead, put me in the corner for time out...because lol I'm going to just go do it again. But if you spank me and me feel the pain for what I did that was wrong...I definitely think twice.

    Again, that's my experience and my opinion.
     
  16. An Gentleman

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    Chinese dude here, I've gotten slapped by my parents a lot...
    I mean, if you're spanking a kid for not finishing their homework or vegetables or whatever, then, okay, that's pretty bad, but spanking them because they stole something, got wasted, or got straight Fs seems justified to me.
    Slapping a kid on the cheek for causing extreme mayhem around a school campus could potentially make them realize the magnitude of what they've done, although the more likely effect would be to pacify them for a little while.
    There are disadvantages to using violence (you might make things even worse), but I think it could work in more severe situations. Of course, abusing the kid is just sick and wrong. I'm not suggesting that abuse is a good kind of discipline, because it really isn't.
     
  17. Hexagon

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    I can just imagine a kid getting suspended for punching another kid. He gets home, and his parents punish him using corporal punishment. Kid thinks, oh, violence is good, better do more. After all, my parents were just violent.
     
  18. chercheur

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    Exactly. It's just like the capital punishment thread; how can anyone say something is bad if they are going to respond in kind, with their punishment.

    Hitting your child only teaches them that violence is okay, and it's not, not under any circumstances. I honestly think this type of punishment is an easy out for lazy (or as another poster said, frustrated) parents, and creates a lot of down the line issues for the kids.

    And to those saying spanking made them better people, I know a lot of families who did NOT spank growing up and instead talked to their kids, rationally, on a grown up level and the kids almost always seem to be the most well adjusted adults I know, with the best relationships with their parents.

    Responding to a wrong with another wrong solves nothing..
     
  19. Lipstick Leuger

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    I am for judicial use of the spank. It is not to be used first, but as a last resort, and then very sparingly. Should you ever hit in the mouth or with anything other than your open hand on their bottom? No. Should it be used in place of any opther type of dicipline? No. You should always talk to your child first and attempt other things, but there are times when a smack on the fanny gets the point across much better than all the talking in the world. Of course people say "well be consistant and kids will learn they can't do that" which is fine to say, but no one is a perfect parent, sometimes you are just to frustrated, to tired, to stressed, etc to be 100% consistant all the time. People are not machines, things slip through the cracks.
     
  20. Sitri

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    Oh! Oh! We just learned about this in psychology! Apperently physical punishment is very affective but should only be used as a last resort as it can cause mental issues like low self-esteem and can easily evolve into full blown abuse.

    Also, children should not be rewarded with candy. Food (being a physiological need) is a very good motivator but children can develop an emotional association to the food. Then they get fat.