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Review my Social Studies Story (Very long) can you give me tips to make it longer?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by TheMrFatcow, Nov 17, 2013.

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  1. TheMrFatcow

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    “After you find out all the things that can go wrong, your life becomes less about living and more about waiting.” ― Chuck Palahniuk. Seven days you can feel the tension rising through the ground; it, it is trembling thumping. It is not a natural disaster though a disaster that we the people have insisted to spread across a broad section of people. This is my diary, John fourteenth of November, Two Thousand & Thirteen. If anyone finds this please take my advice and my story about it. I might be dead by the time that anyone may receive this. If you do please inform my remaining idols, they are my wife, Bella.

    I was walking to the shoe store to go to work when I saw a middle aged man around the age of thirty five collapses to the floor on the driveway. My first instinct was to go toward him and assist him. Though my spine started to tingle and itch. He crawled up back to the hospital. The legs of mine started to walk, faster and faster as the time went on. Soon I realize that I hit the glass door on the hospital. The nurse in the office asked me with urgent notice “What are you doing!” “Man outside crawling, need string band starchier thing”. She stared at me for fifth teen seconds then talked into her little walkie talkie. Three broad men come rushing out of the room that had blinking red lights on it. The nurse opened the door for them and stopped me from going out. “I can help”. “No you are worthless”. I was filled with anger at that point. My hands made a motion and she fell on the ground, once I looked out the three men were already picking the man up. “Hey... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Opening my eyes, I was on the street the nurse must have got up and knocked me with some type of object. My left eye was twitching and my head was filled with dry blood. Someone tapped me on the shoulder, it was my wife. “This is the fourth time that you missed work, stop going to the bar!” her hollering made me cries like a little boy. So that day I just went to work as usual nothing of the unusual. My first instinct was to go to the hospital after work, so I did. As soon as I got to the hospital, with dirt all over my shirt. It was all pitch black, and I gleamed into the window seeing one light. “It’s five pm” as I looked at my watch and stated loudly into the sky. A man soon just went past limping around he was short and bald headed; his hunched back had a one hundred and sixty degree downward motion. His feet… were dripping blood he worked at the hospital I can see it; he was one of the men that went to get the man. Suddenly my ears exploded with tension. A man in a wheelchair had this syringe in his hand and started to throw it at the limping man. They ran as far as I could see. The short man was dead he had been slashed with a needle into his eyeball. It was bleeding brown oily liquids and started to fall out with veins still attached to it. Wheelchair man shut off the light, and that was when I started to run.

    As I got home my wife rushed toward me, “I’ve backed up our things, I’m leaving you. Keep the kid.” My instant reply was “Why”? She slammed the door into my face and drove the mini out of the garage. The tires were screeching making nails on the chalkboard sounds. Depressed, I could just do one thing go on the couch and watch some television. The first channel was saying something about this parasite that was going into the air and people are dying. It was fox news so I didn’t believe it. As I turned more and more channels they either shut off or reported on this weird news. Jake came home about seven o’clock. “Your mom divorced me”. He didn’t even say hello to me like he does everyday. Just went up to his room and slammed the door. The eyes grew tired, I feel asleep on the couch.

    The time I woke up was five eleven, so I put on my dress clothes and went to the shop. My car wasn’t working so I ran to the store. “Sorry Incident, Store Closed FOREVER”. It was time that people should tell me what is going on. I opened the shop with my keys; it was a woman on the floor. She was wearing a raincoat with a huge knife cut down her arm and her brain was being eating by this orange substance, I guessed that it was just bacteria and left it alone. Bob came out with his shotgun and said “Who’s there?” “Me Bob”. His face showed no indication that he was in the mood to have a friendly chat. So I brought up the question “Why are people getting cut”. “John are you blind? It’s on the news if you see these people with eyes that are lopsided or limping they have this thing, h-2 something.” He said in his annoyed voice. Bob gave me a gun called a carbine and told me sixteen millimeters, gave me a pack of ammo, and loaded it up. “What is this for?” I said like an idiot. “Just do what I do”. Rest of the day we sat with our guns in our hands pointing at the door, we walked home together and by the time we got to our houses he asked…. “We should stay in the same house”. I just nodded and opened the house with my key.

    Jake! I cried out he ran from upstairs and started to yell because I had a gun in my hand. “Get out what are you doing!” He exclaimed. “Protection”. For the rest of the night all we did was huddle up and sleep in one bed taking shifts defending the windows and doors. Bob and I took a one hour increment, while Jake just slept the entire night. During the transition of trading spots, Bob told me that all three of us had to cut off our hair; it would be used against us and can be pulled by people with the disease to kill us. The total count of people that choose to come to our house that night: none.

    In the morning we had cut off Jake’s Ponytail, my baldness, and Bob’s ba-duff. By the strike of nine we hit the road and headed off to the country instead of this urban town, Middletown. We planned that we would start to make a new life for us, farming and growing our crops. As we got to the bridge to intersect our state from others we saw a large tank heading our way and the man in there told us to move. We could not exit and it was going to get us killed. Bob got out of the car and stood in front of the tank. He realized soon enough that it didn’t see him and squashed him to death. All we could see was his bones in the head sticking out, the skin collapsing all over it. I turned the car around and stepped on the gas to ninety miles per hour. By the time that we got back to the town it was dusk and the house duty was calling. Tomorrow I told myself that I needed to teach Jake how to use the shotgun that Bob had left in the car seat. I checked the ammo he had in there. Four shells, I guess he would have to use my gun. During night shift my eyes grew tired and I dropped to the floor.

    When I woke up, everything was fine. A shadow was standing up against me and Jake stared at me. Next to him were a dead five year old, no head, just two hands, and one leg, with the body. “Thanks Kiddo”. We ate breakfast and I checked the television, nothing is one. I wonder what is going on the town is quiet, but it seems that only a few come out and it was during dark areas. So I went to my neighbor’s house, luckily they were there but instead of a gun they had two knives both in there hands and nearly stabbed me. Jane was the wife, and Jeremiah was the husband. They had no children and didn’t want any. “Did you see it too?” they told me anxiously. “Ya! I nearly got killed by one, but my son killed it, Thank God.” “Come in quick” and they waved their hand to invite me in. My first question for them was what they are going to do about this. Jeremiah explained to me what the disease is, a parasite that in spread in by the oxygen that we breath in. The name of it is H-20114 or Mark for the first person that was diagnosed with it. The victims are breathing this air that is contaminated and it started to damage the skin and face. First you see the shedding of skin and it is white, it is an early stage and many people do not realize it. Second stage the Brain starts to be eaten away by the parasite and after the frontal cortex is destroyed the eyeballs are the next objective. They hide and lay their eggs in the nerve cell connecters and when the babies are born the leech off the sacs. This is the final stage before the person dies and the parasite gets out of the body when the eye ball falls out and they go up into the air. They are orange line worm looking. Usually they are there for two or three days then the body starts to decompose and die out. Jane has been talking to the doctors for help and all they have told her was some lies that she tried on her sick dad that they have locked up since yesterday. They expect him to die in the next twelve hours. They told me what they are going to do. Run through the sewers and out to the ocean where they can go to Africa, where they can least likely contract the disease. So I informed them about the army huddling around the bridge. By the time I had left it was already midnight. I rushed home and started my duty, my eyes were droopy and the ducts were turning black under the eyes.

    Next day, the hospital had two people contained in this glass box shell and it was giving out this special item I didn’t know what it was so I went to check it out. The sign said cure for the virus! Take two pills per day. My eyes glared up and I was shocked, I ran as fast as I could then I saw people smashing on the glass box and it shattered, the two nurses died and all the pills were taken before I got one fourth the way there. People were already fighting for it, by the time it had ended four men were indulging the bottles of pills and I could see all the dead bodies of women, children, and men alike stabbed to death. What has this world come to? The men that took the pills started to choke, good those rotten bastards. So what I have seen was about thirty six people die of a stupid decision that the hospital put out a probably fake medicine to cure an epidemic that is sweeping our town. We have a large television screen in Main Street, the only thing that it does is inform people about important news. It popped up about the same minute the men had choked on the pills. “Attention all citizens, the president of the United States have died, a bomb from the republic of North Korea has impaled the white house and congress is agreeing to declare the act of 2007 on the foreign state”. I have realized this is going to have us all in danger it must be a worldwide affair that we are going through.



    I could remember the time when this city was booming, the hospital was being built, two gas stations where I live, down main street business were opened and filled with smiling children. Now present day you can see the dust ashes in the air, closed signs everywhere, no lights, heating, windows being broken. We are alone as I could say to the sky. The path I was walking home was raped with curves and potholes it was destroyed as I can sum it up in one word. I just slept and Jake took over night duty, my dream was a dream that I couldn’t resist to remember. I saw Jake and me standing over a dead body which was infested with the disease and we started to eat it. The setting was a forest with the sounds of bugs flapping their wings and the small stream behind us flowing with the echo of a crying voice in the background. So we dug in the carcass eating the intestines first, it smelled like a rat and tasted like butter slipping all over your mouth. Unfortunately this was all I could remember of my dream, because my son woke me up at three am in the morning to tell us that we were all out of food. I put my clothes on; the only pair left that wasn’t used up, and grabbed my gun then left. On Main Street all you could see were empty pavements that haven’t been stepped on for days. This local bakery called the bird’s nest seemed that it still had food in it. As I tried to open the door is collapsed and almost smacked me on the head. Nine dead bodies, the total were two children, five woman, and two males. I was scavenging all I could find. Luckily there was two loafs of sesame seeded bread about two feet long each one and package very nicely. Then I felt someone crawling my foot, though my mind was wandering and thinking that it was just a rat, the child below me started to talk and I could barely comprehend what he was saying. My first instinct was to kill him thinking that he was harm to me, his head bursted into a hundred pieces flying all around the room. Nice another shirt ruined. When I stepped out of the door I thought since I was here might as well just pick up some other supplies, in the department shop I got a wheelbarrow. The gun shop everything was gone, a McDonald I found three cheeseburgers; that was all.

    It was then that I have realized that I needed to go to a different area, containing more supplies, renewable substances till this disease is gone. The wild was an option. We had a forest that we could escape about seven miles down from the main street. As I opened the door to the house I could see Jake pointing a gun into my face. “JAKE!” I screamed as loud as I could. “Hi dad” he said with the biggest sorrow that could ever come out of anybodies mouth. Pack your stuff we are going to go hunting for a long time. He just looked at me with a poker face and rushed up stairs. “Get down here by fifteen.” He had his book bag on his back a gun in his hand and a bandana which looked really retarded in a sense. It was a long walk down to the forest; on the way there Jake asked so many questions that I wanted to say shut up to him every three seconds. Body counts on the way there, two. “Open your bag.” Jake had a box of matches, some bread that I couldn’t put in my bag, and the survival items that come in a huge kit, like a switchblade. I told Jake to grab some branches on the way to a dry area that I could remember from my childhood that I use to come to with my friends. His characteristics have shown off the lazy boy that will never do crap around the house does something, seven leaves and two branches. What a smart kid isn’t he! During the night all we had was a small fire and we both slept, it gave me a sense that we could have gotten killed any minute there. All I could think about that night in my dreams was that little kid that I killed; he could have been the only surviving one without the disease. He didn’t seem to have any symptoms of it. I think it was just for the good of mankind.

    On the first day of our wildlife expedition we tried to look for some food, after a while it was tiresome leaving us having to eat this little rabbit that we got by stepping on As we roasted it on the fire, we heard some stepping it was crunching, “Hello anybody there”. I pointed my gun and shot in the trees without thinking who it could be. A large African Male came to our camp and said can he join? Casually I said yes but with a hesitation to it with my gun still pointing at him it was very easy to pull the trigger. Who are you was the first question I asked. “I am Malcolm”. “Do you have it?” “No” he said so calmly and blindly. We all had to sleep in the one tent together while I took the night shift. In the morning we took roles of who does who. I was going to go hunting for the food, Malcolm was going to look some supplies in the town, and Jake was going to build our camp, and we would rotate every day. I couldn’t trust the black man with my gun showing how dirty and uneducated with him, I would consider him a peasant in own right. A dog.

    We have been living like this for a week now. None of us have shaved we are malnutrition and our bones are getting weaker and weaker. The only item that I haven consumed was some crack that the black brought from and has in his pocket. Jake has been eating dirt I don’t know what to do. The government keeps telling us that they are finding a cure and the disease is being spread from the air that we breathe. Since I heard this the way that we breathe is considered to be a romantic comedy to others. We sucked each others mouths to breathe in the CO2 and as we breathe out we would get the O2 said Jake. I would believe anything that would help us to survive. The only problem we have now in the future is how would we populate if we are the only ones that in the world.

    “Oh Shit” Jake exclaimed. The trees around us started to burn and go up into flames; we needed to get out of here. I tugged Jake by the arm and ran to the closest exit out of the forest that we could find. The black was already in the town so he was safe. Smoke buffed into the air. Suddenly people started to come out and go to the first and hug the trees. They must have the disease I thought, either that or they are mentally challenged. Jake & I slowly backed away and then ran toward the town. Our eyes started to tear faster and faster we need oxygen quick but we didn’t have time to do mouth to mouth so we just breathe the air and the risk of us getting the parasite was getting higher and higher. We met with Malcolm near the train tracts and we told him everything was gone, his face was priceless, but during this time I didn’t want to laugh all our stuff was gone and the risk of our survival was low currently. “Sewers” I shouted it was the only way we could get some water and leave the military confinement that was surrounding our town.

    As we started to depart down into the sewers it felt just as we were going to the underworld, deep, dark, and demonic. The smell taunted Jake to say something about it, all I remember him crying about is how it smelt like mom’s pork chops and the grandma’s funereal. The ground had newspaper on the ground and somewhat fresh water. We tasted it and it was salty we just guessed that it was just that area that had the salt water. The tunnel seemed big for what I thought what it looked look under those sewage holes and water drainers. “Listen everybody and I will set tears pouring from your eyes, no one will rest, fevers will throw down, and it will strike down like lighting, it will kill gods.” The deep voice Malcolm said as he creped and looked back at us with the devilish eyes in Jekyll and Hyde. We had to sleep. I’m thinking if I could trust this man anymore he is sheeping into my soul. Later that night we had to sleep in the tunnel, when I woke up the African had left, we screamed his name but no answer our bags have been taken. Thief.

    I soon woke up Jake and told him to keep walking, because of that bastard we have nothing to eat and to thrive for. All I could hear in my deep ears was Jake praying to god that this was all a dream. “God can’t help us now”. We were half way through the tunnel and our stomachs started to growl, and we didn’t have any food. The only thought that we had was to think that tampered water in the tunnel. We had our hands in a cup and dropped down to grab the water. It was milky and soggy, smelled like chipped wood, I couldn’t contain my nose from devouring the smell. As I took a gulp my neck started to skiver, the pestilence of the water started to go down and my throat felt like it had a rope tied around it about to suicide myself. I had to be hydrated; it was the only way, the only way. “Ha, Ha” my eco-manic voice trolled through the sewers. Turning around to look at Jake gave me this feeling of hate and disgust, do I want to stay alive or have my off breed live on. Jake turned into the monster and he stated that he like the mucky water, the definite disaster. After we stood there for about three minutes of me taking one drink and Jake taking amounts we started to walk again.

    The sunlight stunned my face; I could barely see what was happening. I felt like I was being reborn, it must be very early in the day. I turned around when we got through the sewer and we were back in our neighbor. Great! We had basically walked nine miles of damp filled trash and polluted water. I guess that Jake & I should go back home and break into other houses to look for food. While walking home we saw this couple just outside of their porch, we saw a child I could defer the sex; it was about the age of four and had the most demented face you could ever see. The male of the family grabbed her face and slowly just kissed her on the forehead. That’s what I thought was happening, the kiss was long and not a normal kiss that you would do to your lover. When the man pulled back he cleaned his mouth and then the girl’s face was bitten off. The eye balls have gotten pulled out and the two pupils were spitted out by the man on the porch. Her mouth stayed in one position and the bottom lip was completely tarred off. His wife just kept looking up at the sky look she didn’t even notice; I started to question is she blind, deaf, both? The little girl had fallen on the ground then, then, then, he started to tear her clothes off and eat her back. This is cannibalism, a reason that this humanity wasn’t designed and evolved from. Jake grabbed a large stick that he had found in the sewer and it was dry with a very pointy area that could nearly stab anyone. He threw it from a long distance three townhouses away.

    It didn’t hit, not even close. The man just stood up from his dinner and walks out on the pavement then just screamed and fell on the ground. It was a horrifying act, and I was bewildered what he had done. After that we just kept walking back home there was no other android that happened as we went. When I tried to open the door it was jammed and I had realized the lights were on in the attic. “There’s someone in our house”. We slowly opened the garage door and used the key that I had left on the shelf in case of an emergency to open the door. I heard snatching and whispering through the top of the house. Jake stayed behind just in case he gets hurt; I can still provide my genes into a new world. The door was wide open, there was a light bulb on the ground stinging the fuse was going dimmer and dimmer. What I thought was two people actually were a white female citizen that was talking to her. I barged into the room kicking her down to the ground and stepping on her face a million times. Screaming started to come out of the room. Jake violently rushed upstairs and just stood in the pathway from the door. “She’s dead and I’m hungry”. I look at him with the out most disgust and then we both looked at the body like it was our only hope. We are almost going to die of this starvation and not because of the disease. So this was the only time in my life that I have and will going to eat human flesh. It tasted like a pile of trash, barely any taste. I can barely start to describe how I felt about it. Though now I was first time in three weeks actually a full man.

    I wanted to get out of the room and that’s what I did. My legs were sworn and didn’t want to do anything but stand there just shocked to death. Then I fell to the ground and didn’t move. It was this siren sound that had woken me up from my slumber. When I had look out of the window men in this greenish color had a cobalt-twelve in their hands and just began shooting at the first sight of man. Behind them they had this type of medieval stock torturing device and there were four men inside, all of them covering their shoulders and being naked. We have reverted back in a system of torture which we declared unconstitutional. The bars of the Chinese torture device were rusted and brown covering all over; three bars on each side infested with dust and famine. Three out of the four men seemed that they had symptoms of the disease, and they were spreading it on to the other man. We have no centralized, a congress that isn’t there most of the time, a dictated military with enforces that can killed anyone at sight, not deferring them to a system of rulings and judgments. I tired to open the door and throw something to see if the men would react to the distraction that I put out, I told this plan to Jake that I would open the basement door and escape to the neighbors house knock on their door and ask to come in while he distracts for about fifteen seconds then do the same plan as me. “I hope that this will work” Jake replied. We did the divergent and it came as a surprise that the men did react they started shooting randomly and burst air blasts at everything that moved. The trees were falling to the ground and it made this large crash, like a airplane hitting the ground and its engine going up into flames that are sparking out of control everywhere. As I was knocking on the door of Jane’s house they just smashed their face on the door, I was thinking that they were having sex, and as soon as I stared up they grabbed their clothes and came down to open the basement door. Jake came immediately in the next minute. “What the hell are you doing, having sex during a military outbreak?”
    It was silence for the next three minutes.

    I told them about how we have to get out of this town and swim to a different country; they replied with that they have a boat in their summer house and that we could use it go to somewhere else. We thought about the ways that we could get the supplies and most of the time it was us touching our chins acting that we were thinking but we are really just acting like idiots. “Oh! I know what we could do we have bows up in the attic and we could shoot the military men outside and take their things and use their bodies as energy for ourselves. So as we went up to the attic and saw three long bows. Two of them were carved out of wood, and the last one which I was using was made out of plastic and is used in competitive play. There were seven arrows so we had to use them wisely. I told Jake to check out of the window and see how many army men where there. He stated that there were four of them. “If we hit them all at the same time, we might be able to take over the truck that they have”. We opened the window to the top of the house and got on it. As we reclined the bows and arrows my arm tingled and accidentally shot an arrow, it alarmed the men we ran inside the house and hid as fast as possible. “The basement” one of us shouted and we took all of our bows and arrows with us. All of us you can see have arrows, but Jake pointing at the door. We heard upstairs the door being knocked down. All men whispering to each other. It was in my defense it was a very demoralizing event. It was about three minutes till they came now, the door was squeaking open. The door soon just flopped opened. I let go of my arrow so did the three of us killing two of the men. All was silent, we recharged our shots but no one came. We went up the steps looked around no one, everyone had left. The bodies, we put them in the freezer and cut off the leg. Jeremiah took a solar panel pan out of the closet, and started to cook the meat. It was delicious and I didn’t have any guilt for killing that man, it was in my fact an act of self defense. Jake didn’t eat anything for some reason it was kind of disturbing. We put him in a corner just in case, “He has been quiet for a while”. Later that day, we heard coughing from the bathroom. Jane and I went to see who it was, Jake was standing there holding his throat and coughing up blood. His eyes were droopy and didn’t resemble himself. “Can I talk to you in private, John?” “He has it, kill him”. My eyes just shot up and didn’t respond to the words that she was saying, “Can we just quarantine him till we can find out if he has it or not?” She just nodded and knew what I was going through. So we did what my plan had in mind. In a wooden cage, he just sat there, showing twitching and vomiting. I couldn’t bare it anymore. At three am in the morning, I went downstairs. “I Love you Son.” The bow went right through his skull and into the wood. I went back up to bed.

    The next day when I came downstairs, his body was gone, but I smelt breakfast in the kitchen. “Good morning” they both shouted. So I just sat at the coffee table waiting for Jeremiah to be finishing cooking. On the plate it was an arm, an entire arm but the fingers seemed too small to be the men. I just started to eat and it was meh. After I was done eating I asked which body did he take it from. “The one that was in the wooden barricade.” I threw up after he said that, “That was my son.” He replied with saying that we needed to get everything that we could and that it is about survival not about love. I didn’t say a word that entire day, and we already have enough supplies. Don’t feed a man his love nor his pain. A sun set started to come, so I went outside and took a long walk. At this area where a lake was I saw fire burning behind it. So I as a nosey elder man went to check what it was. I saw two females and one little girl about the age of seven around a bowl that had a red substance in it. The heat had steam coming from it. Remember I couldn’t see the most of it since I was seeing it through the branches of trees. It was then that the two females grabbed a knife from the ground, it was not dull it was very sharp and it looks like it was in mint condition. They put it to the little girls’ head and chopped her long brown hair in two swift cuts. Then dropped it into the mixture. They also dropped some these herbs that I couldn’t really see what it was, some yellow mixture. After that they said a chant and put the knife to the legs of the girls. It was when that time the girl started to scream they slashed it as fast as possible, and they did this with every body part, cut off it then say a chant for the next one. After twenty minutes of agonizing pain and screaming the girl was dead and she was in the bowl. They mixed the bowl for five minutes saying this chant over and over, then came out of their pockets a small wooden bottle about the size of a pop can. Dipped the bottle into the girl’s blood and they drank it. By that time I had left the scene and didn’t want to see anymore of it. It was about the time of dusk and should get back home. When I did an arrow was pointed to my face, every-time this happens and then it is a false alarm. I slept an unmerciful dream of a dream. Girls and boys being used by their parents to do these deeds, dying to them and then using their corpse as a method of surviving this disease, our town barely capable of doing anything else. Nearly all the houses were abandoning and you could just step into one and welcome yourself in. Family members didn’t take care of themselves and had guilt toward their own wives and children. This is one of the worst nightmares that I would have in a while. I realized that I had woken up screaming out of the couch. A dark red color came into sight at the window. People with torches started to ram the streets; I thought that they were all dead. Watching them it felt like a monster movie, you can see them trying to kill something. They soon stopped at this field which had a dark brown tree with a bee’s nest attached to it. First a rioting man threw the torch into the area and it started to burn, the rest of the group then joined in and after the tree was burned to ashes, the field burned. It took a while to spread but it came to destroy one of the houses. When I realized that I told Jeremiah and Jane to wake up grab their things and go to the boat that they were talking about. We tip-toed across the street and then ran off into the night like the wind. The dark pathway was serious; all three of us didn’t say a word to each other. It was a dead movie, I remarked. When we got to the coast of the Delmarva it was a treated that I was waiting for.... salt water, thought it may not absorb the salt (my body) I didn’t care and didn’t resist. I dived into the water then gulped a large one. That night we just stayed in the house and didn’t have any food that day.

    We set up the boat and it looked all ratchet up and never used. “Do you know how to sail a boat.” I asked quietly. No answer that is what I received. How about the food I was thinking about if we go do we have to fish, do we need to stock up before we go, what happens if we didn’t get anything at all and when we get to land it was just a empty pile of land. No fruits, meat, vegetable. The water seemed to look calm and filled with fishes that Is what I thought. Making a decision to go or not, I precaution Jane and Jeremiah to not go and stay on the land, they were all I had and it had to be stopped the disease and now we have a woman so we can repopulate. I am going insane. Its fine all I have to do is just wait. The brink of the next day Jeremiah woke me up and told us that we have to go before it’s too late. So we did all I could think of was this quote that Charles Darwin quoted “Survival of the Fittest”. First day on the boat was calm we caught some fish, but I just slept in and thought of two words the entire time. Just Wait. Just Wait
     
  2. TheMrFatcow

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    Re: Review my Social Studies Story (Very long) can you give me tips to make it longer

    .
     
  3. resu

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    Re: Review my Social Studies Story (Very long) can you give me tips to make it longer

    You should not be asking others, especially online, to help you do your homework.
     
  4. Fiddledeedee

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    Re: Review my Social Studies Story (Very long) can you give me tips to make it longer

    Got it in one. EC is not a homework help site.
     
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