How do YOU deal with crushes on straight people?

I consciously make an effort to remind myself that its a dead end road. You cant change them. But I agree, its sometimes depressing.

 

what fulcrum said

 

I will try and find something I dont like about them and focus on that. It might sound nasty but it may help you get over your crush.

 

Don't have any anymore. After have 2 straight crushes that ended up crushing me, I put up a mental block and they never come up anymore.

 

I just think- "She's straight, with a straight man and has two children - but isn't it cool that I can recognise how cool, funny, clever, sexy etc she is" (and hope her straight, male partner recognises that too and treats her the way she deserves!)

 

As I've matured I've learnt what a load of rubbish crushes (or at least long distance crushes) are. I personally believe that the only people worth getting excited about are the ones who actually like you back.

 

used to have a #ank about some cute lads at school

 

It's fun to make-believe that a crush is secretly gay. That's all it can be is a game. Becoming obsessed with a crush leads to stalking behavior. For your own sanity you have to treat it like a game if they are straight.

 

I've become very impervious to it after having some miserable experiences already. I can look at hot straight guys, as well as keep them close to me emotionally without falling for them. I think that being in a hopeless state like that has become unattractive to me in itself. If I think about the exhausting, draining and unsatisfying feelings of straight crushing it outweighs the feelings of affection. Makes it easier for me to keep my head around even the most appealing straight boys.

 

It can be. I've always known that the guys who have caught my eye the most aren't available. People chalk it up to a dysfunctional fascination with the unavailable and whatnot. Maybe it is. As a 14 year old who saw a hot looking suit downtown, my mind wasn't that sophisticated to process it that way. That was just my taste. Period.

 

You just got to try to get over it any way you can. Me and my straight crush happen to be good friends now, which is just as fine for me.

 

This is a very good point. When I've been slightly obsessed with someone, I didn't stalk them in the sense that I followed them or wanted to be in their life through devious methods. I simply wanted to know their biographies and schemas, to have them all figured out. That sufficed. The other thing that helped is learning that people who are attractive, rich, and/or popular can be just as messed up, or even more so, than those who aren't. It's completely person-specific, though.

 

meh - I have not had a real date in 24 years - I am more bothered that I can't seem to find anybody in the community who is supposedly interested in me to worry about falling for those who I know are out of reach


I mean if a lesbian won't date me - a straight womon sure won't :dry:

 

They just sort of fade overtime I guess, though I still have a crush on my best friend and I think it won't be gone until I tell him and he rejects me.

There's one thing that helps me get me over them, almost instantly and that's if they're happy. There was this guy that I sort of fell for and man did I fell hard, but of course he was straight and it killed me. Then he started dating a friend of mine, they eventually got married, and they had a child. When I saw them together and how happy they were, it sort of just killed any desire I had for him and allowed me to let go of something that I'll never have. Even though it's cheesy, I guess I was just glad he was happy and in the end, that's all that matters.

 

Imagine something really disgusting about them. Like imagine them taking a dump or inserting their finger up their belly button to remove the dusty stuff in it.

That is ENOUGH to kill my sex drive. I think I will become borderline asexual at this rate hahaha.

 

I only crushed on straight men twice in my life. Both of them were my schoolmates, and by crushing, I mean, to literally fall in love. It was though to handle those emotions, and specially in the case of the later, I suffered and cried for him for many months. It got worse when he got a girlfriend and I started hating her, even though she was always very nice to me. In the end, I composed a song for him, and it helped me a lot getting over that crush. Now I hope hes happy, but when he told me I was one of the best friends he had this year, I began to sob.

Most of the straight men I am interesting in have nothing romantic going for them, just sex. I can easily get over it, or not. This is what my five fingers are for, before I go to sleep everyday

 

Swap lesbian/woman with gay/man and you have my situation. I have enough trouble finding half decent gay guys as it is, let alone bothering with a straight crush. The former pretty much overrides the latter and keeps straight crushing at bay.

If I can't even find decent gay guys, then that helps prevent straight crushes from forming because there's no chance in hell there.

 

repeating this to myself