why do gay people have to come out??

I guess it depends on the person. I have never felt the need to "come out" to anyone because I have always just accepted my attractions and feelings towards people.
Some people might have struggled with it for a long while though and because of that it might seem like a very big deal to them. Maybe it is to say "I have come to a conclusion, here it is" to make it sort of official. I don't know, just a guess

Also, I know a lof of people who just go with the flow and have never "come out" to anyone either.

 

because we live in a Heteronormative (see the computer won't even let me say that says it is not eve n a word) actually took me 5 minutes to get it right :***: computer kept messing it up!

we have to fight for our place in the world because no straight person get bullied for being straight, they may get bullied for being fat or skinny or some other thing but never for being straight. We come out because we are assumed not to be who we are if we don't.

 

Although I've been asked by my dad if I was gay (twice I think), I neither confirmed nor denied (which must have come across as a "no"). I suppose my only option will be to say something (or "come out") myself at some point, unless I'm asked again at a point when I feel comfortable enough to say "yes".

 

Its not a big thing for me.

 

This exactly. In this world, everyone is assumed straight until proven otherwise. Heterosexuality is seen as the default.

 

Because the majority of people are straight so that assumption is made of everyone unless they declare otherwise or display characteristics associated with gay people. The latter is misleading, though, as real people don't fall under the stereotypes we've boxed ourselves into.

 

When a gay person comes out, they get to be themselves. Also, when you come out, you get to find a relationship. Love is one of the best feelings. If a gay person stays in the closet, they'll never find true love. Also, its horrible to stay in the closet. Staying in the closet means that you're not being yourself and you're living a lie. Its a horrible feeling to not be yourself. I've been a lot happier after coming out. I never felt more myself. I haven't found love yet, but that's because I'm young.

 

Or maybe people just assume that other people take them to be straight? I think it depends on where you live. I think a lot of people might be "assuming" because other peoples sexuality isnt really important to them.

 

^ Well nevertheless, you've still got to come out. Or have you not had conversations with people who try and impress you by saying how hot that one person of the opposite sex is?

It used to be a huge thing (still kind of is) because LGBT people were so taboo 20, 30, 40 years ago. Now, it's simply "Um, I'm not straight. Just letting you know that" in more places than before. It's simply correcting.

 

I think coming out become hard where you have some people around you who want to make you different from the way you are, to make you as they want, and when a person don't accept itself.

It's not right!
We have to be ourselves, so the coming out become more simple.

When I came out for the first time, I was so sheepish, so ashamed...because I did not accept myself, the gender binarism "forced" me to be or a man or a woman. But now, is different.

If you accept yourself, it is easy, if you don't accept yourself, it is hard.

 

this is it exactly

so many people talk to me and it is like

but don't you think that and it depends on who it is someone

Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise or David Hasselhoff (when I was young) or anyone else and I am no not me

don't you understand

lesbian? I like their talents that is all

 

Because they want the press for their new talk sh......

Oh, wrong topic.

All jokes aside, it really depends. Some people come out because they want the acceptance. Hey, I'm pretty obvious and there are people (although few) who still think that I'm straight and will ask "So any girls in your life?"

Others do it for attention or just because. It totally depends on the person.

 

Because the LGBT community is looked at by majority as 'not the default' because as I'm sure it's been posted upwards in the thread, we live in a heteronormative world where the majority is simply straight and if you don't say anything then they assume you're straight as well unless you show any outward signs.

 

I think we'll eventually get to the point where it's not so much "coming out" (big, scary phrase to describe a moment that could range from the feelings of an intervention, to a carnival or a trip to the shops, depending on the person, their family, friends, colleagues, etc) as a series of casual conversations with various people in your life where you just say something along the lines of "My type, well, I suppose I tend to fancy women with bony shoulders (hah, yes bony shoulders, what can I say?). How about you?" "Me? Well, I tend to fancy tall men with moustaches". "Ah."

At the moment, though, the heteronormative thing is true, we need to explain that we are other in a certain way, even though actually everybody is different to each other in sexual tastes anyway.

 

As a guy who uses the Kinsey scale to judge sexuality...
I can say that a lot of people are 1-3 on the scale.
The majority is straight, for some reason, and we have to tell people that we're not.
(I personally assume everyone is bi unless proven otherwise.)

 

If people just looked at the eyes, they wouldn't have to assume haha

... which is scary because sometimes I have to stop looking at guys when I'm around my more observant and self-aware friends >_>

 

It's better now because queers stopped hiding and fought for acceptance. It's not just an individual thing. When most queers were in the closet, the straight world believed that's where we belonged, and there was hell to pay if you weren't.

 

There is still "hell to pay" for many people in many places, which is why closet doors aren't going out of style any time soon.

 

This. Even just coming out to a couple of people has made me so much happier and more comfortable and confident being myself.