Freudian Slips

[Hoppip]

FROM WIKIPEDIA:
A Freudian slip, or parapraxis, is an error in speech, memory, or physical action that is believed to be caused by the unconscious mind.

Some errors, such as a man accidentally calling his wife by the name of another woman, seem to represent relatively clear cases of Freudian slips. In other cases, the error might appear to be trivial or bizarre, but may show some deeper meaning on analysis. As a common pun goes, "A Freudian slip is like saying one thing, but meaning your mother." A Freudian slip is not limited to a slip of the tongue, or to sexual desires. It can extend to our word perception where we might read a word incorrectly because of our fixations. It is important to note that these slips are semi-conscious. This is to say that these thoughts are consciously repressed and then unconsciously released. This is unlike true Freudian repression, which is the unconscious act of making something conscious.

Have you ever had or heard an embarassing Freudian slips? Because I have two:

1.
I wanted to go to the commons (an outdoor mall), so I woke up my mom.
"Hey mom, can I go to the condoms - condoms - COMMONS today?"

I sware I wasn't thinking about condoms at all!

2.
I was walking in a clothing store with my friends (one of them my gay crush, for God's sake) and we walked by a big wall of underwear. And on each package was a ripped, shirtless guy with tight underwear.

And I meant to turn around and say, "Okaaay..."

But then I said, "Oh-GAY." My friends gave me so much stuff for that. -_-

TO ALL OF EC.

Let's hear those Freudian slips. Because I know I'm not the only one. :P

[pirateninja]

There is one from my friend which we haven't let her live down; in a biology lesson, while talking aboot "Micro-organisms", she said (Yep, you guessed it) "Micro-orgasms".

And another from my mom, although not substituting a word for another, but it was hilarious all the same, in response to "What is a wok?", she replied "It's a frinese chying pan."

[Shido]

every time I mean to type 'disk' or 'disc' I end up typing 'dick' O_o I have to type is slow to make sure I get it right..
Every time I mean to type 'student', I type 'stupid'
I told Samii the other day that I have to go to the store for a dog of bag food.
Meant to say to a friend that I teach another friend English...ended up saying "I TOUCH *insert name* enough anyway."

[Blaz]

Originally Posted by pirateninja

There is one from my friend which we haven't let her live down; in a biology lesson, while talking aboot "Micro-organisms", she said (Yep, you guessed it) "Micro-orgasms".

And another from my mom, although not substituting a word for another, but it was hilarious all the same, in response to "What is a wok?", she replied "It's a frinese chying pan."

Well, mine aren't really funny(Just stuff like "mezmerize" for "memorize"), but I've had a friend in biology who was reading a passage and he kept saying "orgasms" instead of "organisms" too, over and over again!!!

My teacher once ask one of the students in my class if he had brought a "floppy dick" instead of a "floppy disk". The who class exploded with laughter.

[jazzrawr]

A friend and I were talking about how great her ass was, and she meant to say "Its an awesome ass" But she said "It's an assome." We laughed for a good long while. It's our new word now. ^.^

[Hoppip]

Oh God! I remember another one!

It was in biology at the beginning of the year. My teacher was reading the syllabus to the class.

He was supposed to say horseplay, but he said, "And finally guys, ESPECIALLY during labs, there will be absolutely NO foreplay."

There was a pause. I don't actually think anybody initially caught it. And then he's like, "I mean... horseplay."

And then, of course, we lost about five minutes of class to insane violent giggling.

[Nodnarb]

The other day I was talking to my dad and TWICE I said "Those gays" rather than "those guys"....It got to the point that I started talking slower to make sure I said it the right way.

And going with the biology ones, my biology teacher once said "orgasms" instead of "organisms". Obviously, everybody had a good laugh from that one.

[Mmmike]

I get so many of these it's rediculous.

I was at Dairy Queen and i went to order a Reese's Pieces blizzard and instead i said Reese's Penis :P I don't think anyone heard me though.

[Joey]

Hmmmm.... One would've been when I was talking to my ex boyfriend over AIM and I kept on writing "cock" instead of "coke". It led to some pretty interesting "vanilla flavored cock" comments, especially when I said it was one of my favorite drinks...

Oh yeah, and another would be when I was in bio lab last semester and we were talking about stuff... and I said "Blah blah is a very important orgasm to the environment..." and I stopped dead and my professor looked at me and went "Well, I could see where you would say orgasms are important, but it's also important as an ORGANISM as well"

[sexyalex]

OK

SO! i am in Maths class and mymath teacher who KNOWS how dunce i am at math calls me to the board after waking me up from hibernation and tells me i must work and explain out some kinda circltyrum formula. I am like(in a sleepy voice)"the formula for this is 3.14 divided by sex and u find the tangent for the triangle inside then mime us it by the circumfrence of the circle.

those were meant to be "six" and "minus"
and i did get in trouble for it

anyways,

the epic one.
One day i was in english class and i kept raising my hand to answer questions but teachers here kinda get tired of me (as i said earlier in another forum) cuz i answer most, if not all the questions is clas. So i kept raising my hand *litteraly burning to answer* and i kept shouting Ms.! Ms.! Ms.!(cuz here we have to address our teachers by, Ms. Madam, Senorita, Madmoselle or Sir)
and by the slip of the tongue with a loud roar i cried "MOMMY!" instead of Ms.:
the whole class turned and looked at me same time and it was soo silent, someone pencil rolled off their table and u could hear it drop. Usually in my class, it's soo noisy u can't even hear urself think!

[WilbersRevenge]

I had ths random phase of adding "el-o grande" to everything:
Example- for cheese, it was el cheeso grande
Anyways. I had just gotten home from picking up pizza. I walked in the door and said "I'm el homo grande" (instead of I'm home). I don't think anyone was paying attention, but I told my friends about it and they won't let me live it down. = P

[BreakingGlass]

Someone at work was answering their cell on break and sometimes they say something funny when answering, well the woman meant to say "This is Pete's Pool Hall" but said "Pete's Poo Hole." lmao.

[Shido]

eeew

[TriBi]

Originally Posted by pirateninja

There is one from my friend which we haven't let her live down; in a biology lesson, while talking aboot "Micro-organisms", she said (Yep, you guessed it) "Micro-orgasms".

Hehe - that same slip actually caused quite a stir here just the other week - when it was made in Parliament by one of our politicians trying to talk about "Genetically modified organisms" - he realised he'd read it wrong, so tried to correct himself - and then said "orgasms" for a second time!

[SlickyPants]

There is one moment that sicks out in my mind. I was working and my co-worker (named John) was lifting something heavy. I meant to say "Do you want a hand, John" but it came out as "Do you want a handjob?"

Fortunately I think he's partially deaf.


Here are a few news bloopers with some Freudian slips.

+ YouTube Video

+ YouTube Video

+ YouTube Video

[Blitzkrieg]

I've had so many embarrassing moments with these!
I was talking to my friend about different colleges in different states and she said:
"I was looking into this college in virginia, it seems really nice." and I said "You really want to move to Vagina? It's so far away!" Haha I've never lived that one down.
I used to slip up occasionally and call one of my ex girlfriends by another girls name, that never went over too well.

[Tim]

Originally Posted by pirateninja

There is one from my friend which we haven't let her live down; in a biology lesson, while talking aboot "Micro-organisms", she said (Yep, you guessed it) "Micro-orgasms".

And another from my mom, although not substituting a word for another, but it was hilarious all the same, in response to "What is a wok?", she replied "It's a frinese chying pan."

OMG In science class like in 10th grade, 5 people did that on the same day (The Orgasm instead of Organism)

In german class last year, one of my friends was doing a presentation in front of the class, and meant to say Shoes, and when she said "I went out to buy a pair of..." She slipped up and said scheiße, which mean Sh. The teachers mouth dropped and every single person broke into laughter, as we all knew what it meant.

I have slips everyday, so I don't keep track of specific ones :S

[Maddy]

Not exactly a Freudian slip, but my best effort was a time I hadn't proofread an essay properly, and I'd made a typo on the word "nicest". Yep. I ended up describing someone as "ironically the incest character..."

[otc877]

But... he's gay...er wait blind

+ YouTube Video

[Brett]

Hmmm....well one that I used to do alot is right after my cousin slammed my head in a cardoor I kept sayig, "she slammed the head on my door" which might be because she slammed the door on my head......
But my big one happened last Thanksgiving after dinner. I was sitting in the living room with my Grandparents and my 99 yr old Great Grandma playing with the dog and making him do tricks, and I said, "I taught my dog most of the tricks that he knows, I taught him to shit, lay.......down........o//o"
It looked like all of them had had heart attacks.........but then we started laughing about it after a few seconds....it was actually kinda scary!