I never had a best friend

Haha. I am just like you. I don't really know if I actually have a best friend. I tend to feel like I'm distancing myself from people. It's just something I was taught from the beginning. I was always taught that I should never completely trust in anybody unless you're 100% sure. So I am kinda lonely. Luckily I have family members who are really close to me. (Not sure if they will continue to be after I reveal my orientation). So ya. It is actually lonely but I think you can turn to your family as an alternative

 

Ever since I came out my "best friend" has been drifting away... It's hard, he was literally the only person who doesn't seem to accept me. I get the vibe he doesn't want us to be seen in public together. Hell, just the other day he ditched me in the hallway for someone he had recently met like a day ago. The only reason I hold onto him is because his mom saved my life, I think. I don't know. But anyway, I can use one hand to count all my friends that I truly believe are friends.


I can say that having a best friend is something that was helpful to me, and I struggle without having them close but I'm learning to deal with it. I have made friends on the internet that I can probably trust more now.

 

See,you and I are the polar opposite. You actually want friends. Does that mean I'm anti-social hell no,I just don't want to be bothered with all of their drama and everything you know? See,don't label me as an asshole but people that you know tell me stuff (this is IRL not the internet) I honestly can care less unless it's a boyfriend or my family. But to answer your question I do have a best acquaintance and that's the guy I'm pursuing but other than that the rest are..."friends."

 

At the moment all my friends are over the internet, and one that I consider best friend too

I know how you feel though, and I think what you need is a friend that you can talk to alot and maybe even hang out with, and thats the feeling you seek in a "best" friend that you don't find in your current friends ?
Looking for one in forums is a great start in my opinion, about RL I can't be much of a help hehe

 

I hate to bring out the introvert in me but I feel it is appropriate. Why exactly do you want friends, let alone a best friend. I realize you stated it in your post but try again, it doesn't sound like an authentic reason. That being said, I am by no means closing myself off to other people, quite the opposite. The good thing about a best friend is just someone who will listen, tell you stuff, and give you adivce. However, being an introvert, I dislike being in social interactions for a long period of time without some alone-ness. If I need someone to listen about my problems, chances are that I'll write them down. If I need someone to give me advice, I could reflect. I don't really care about what all is going around me.

Even after I said the above, I do have one or two best friends. They are the best people I could ever ask for at the moment. They both are wonderful, down-to-earth human beings who I feel I can share my experiences with.

That being said, I do feel like that it is not necessary to have a best friend.

 

Different people have different needs, and if he feel he needs a best friend in his definition, then by all means he should look for one

 

Don't feel bad. My last bestie I ever had was in 6th back in 2006/2007 for me. it is justified since I have moved several times, but even when I did finally stop moving around so much by 7th grade it still didn't add me and BFFs. I was also teased a bit in school and thus became a loner. I am pretty much accustomed to it now and people seem increasingly hard to fully acquaint with the older I get (excluding those 10+ yrs older). I am now 20 and been without a best friend since 14 but truthfully it doesn't bother me at all since i have a ton of solitary and creative hobbies.

Perhaps you could spend the time you would normally spend with a buddy developing yourself for the better, and perhaps you may even come across a new best friend in the process.

 

That sounds similar to me except the fact that I did have a best friend back in the day. Now i just have a lot of friends and not an actual close, best friend to share my secrets and spend a lot of time with.

 

I get that, it is not nor will it ever be my place to tell people what they need to do. I guess I should have added something to the effect of 'This may not be the case for you.'

 

I do and I didn't meet him until my junior year of high school. It's just like finding a romantic partner...it'll happen when it'll happen and you'll know they're the right person for you.

 

One best friend died. Another best friend moved far away. We lost contact. A third best friend betrayed my confidence. This along with not being able to trust family members has made me very guarded.

 

I've pretty much always had a best friend... though some best friends were better than others (I've had about 5). But right now, I consider myself to have two best friends. One is a girl and one is a guy and I care so deeply for both of them and I know they do for me. I should add though that the guy here is my ex who I sometimes still find myself attracted to but yeah. Me and him have been through so much, the fact that we're still such good friends is amazing. I also have quite a lot of other friends/acquaintances, I'm just blessed really.

There were 2 years though, when I was 13/14, that I basically had no one I could really consider a friend. Apart from one girl who was my best friend, but she lived far away and we only saw each other during summer. So during the rest of the year I would basically be kind of lonely and sort of lack a social life. I see those 2-ish years as the worst years of my life - not necessarily bad, but I can't imagine living without friends anymore. In fact I wasn't truly alive during that time. I'm glad it has only gotten better since then.

I can't really give you any advice or anything, because I have never really had to make an effort to make friends, it always just... happens.

 

I don't have a bestfriend as well..But I would love to have one. Trust issues maybe. -_- hmm

 

I always had best friends or at least one good friend i could count on through out the years. My last best friend we was friends for 7 years. She changed my life big time she shaped who i am i used to be such a home body never went out or did anything she helped me crack open that shell and i met so many people through her. we had some drama in 2011 and it put a dent on our friendship and she met a guy on top of that so he doesn't really allow her to have friends so we really never had a chance to repair our friendship we talk often but its not like it used be. I had a good friend before her and all 3 of us were friends but we all split up pretty much. I briefly became friends with this one girl i met we was pretty good friends hung out. She acted different and eventually met a guy and we stopped talking. At the moment i have a some decent friends/acquaintances that i hang out with and talk to often. Would a bestfriend be nice? It would be but its not important anymore im just happy with the friends i have currently.

I kinda think the bestfriend concept is going away its not like it used to be meet someone and become forever friends with them. Imo people aren't putting a big effort in being friends these days or even good friends. People do the fake friend rant on facebook and thats pretty much it. People seem to be more worried about dating and settling down then making friends.

Also, you have to put your self out there to make friends if your sitting in the house wishing for friends its not going to happen. I probably missed out on some really great friends in the past because i was a home body. Your 14 and in school join clubs,sports after school programs and get to know people and start making friends. Thanks to College and Work and Facebook i met some great people i go on friend dates with them some people i click with and some i don't.

 

I'm a bit too guarded since several close friends throughout my life have unapologetically stabbed me in the back. I am very close to at least one person at the moment who I consider to be a best friend, but at the same time she has plenty of other friends, so I don't have a "mutual best friendship" for want of a better expression. I'm totally with you though, even in a platonic sense it would just be amazing to find someone who wants to hang out with you as much as you want to hang out with them.