Gay girls and lesbians

[heatqueen]

Has anyone else noticed:

Straight girls talk about 'lesbians'
Lesbians talk about 'gay girls'

I think it might be because when a lesbian figures it out, lots of them are more comfortable calliing themselves 'gay' because 'lesbian' sounds like a disease or whatever.

When I'm amongst classmates and they start talking about 'lesbians' I always make myself use the word 'lesbian' even if I feel like saying 'gay girl'.

Hmm. Might be a good gaydar technique. Check for anyone who starts talking about 'gay girls' and you've caught one!!!

I don't know. I mean I know for myself when I was first coming to terms with being gay I found the words gay easier to say then lesbian when talking about myself and I guess it just stuck: although i use the word lesbian a lot more now, I'm a sucker for the technical terms. Maybe it's because of the emotional ties we feel towards the word that straight girls don't have so they can talk about it with no real problems.
...??? Don't know about anyone else but that makes sense to me...???...

[ccdd]

I think you're right. It's the same with me, and my friends who are gay or bi. None of us seem to like the word "lesbian". I prefer the word "gay", and will usually specify that I mean gay girls or gay women.

Even though at the moment I am now identifying as bisexual, whenever I have come out to people or whatever, it has been as gay, not as lesbian.

Yay for another gaydar technique!!

[Maddy]

I think you're right. I don't much like using the word lesbian about myself or about other people, I think because I've heard it so often used by other people in a derogatory way. (Not that I haven't heard 'gay' used in the same way - might be why I tend to say 'queer' instead.)

[Blitzkrieg]

It's about time for this thred to be invaded by a man! I tend to notice lesbians I know referring themselves more often as gay then as lesbians. I'd have to agree with hearing straight people using the term lesbian more often than gay women who simply refer to themselves as gay.

[cc6log]

On South Park they prefer the French Les Bos "Leh Boe"

I have found them referring to themselves as gay also...

[pirateninja]

Originally Posted by cc6log

On South Park they prefer the French Les Bos "Leh Boe"

I have found them referring to themselves as gay also...

The name of the Lesbian bar was Les Bos, but they just pronounced it "Leh Boe" because that's how french people would pronounce something written "Les Bos".

Sorry, just had to have some input.

But yes, I do tend to say "I'm gay" again mostly because lesbian sounds a bit nasty if you ask me, like a disease. But there is now another gaydar technique! YES!

[cc6log]

The top part was a bit of bad humor on my part

The bottom was the serious part of it

[jazzrawr]

Heatqueen, you've discovered something ingenious! XD
I totally do that, I refer to myself as gay, and everyone else uses the word 'lesbian'.

I dont like the word actually, because you have to say you are a lesbian, and it makes me feel like we're really different from everyone else, which we're really not.
Gay people say they are gay, straight people say they are straight.

But we're lesbians.
We sound like a whole other race XD
I don't like it! XD

[Trumpetplyer23]

Yeah....you are right heatqueen. Except, where I live, people think that if you're a lesbian that you're not gay. That gay is reserved for men and lesbian is reserved for women. It's quite.....label setting.

[heatqueen]

Haha I loved the 'les bos' thing!!

Yeah I also hate having to say 'I'm a lesbian".

I mean gay people just have to say 'I'm gay'. They're not 'a' anything!! No fair!! Probably why I prefer 'gay' to 'lesbian'.

[Trumpetplyer23]

You could always say "I'm lesbian". That could work too...idk though.

[heatqueen]

^Nahhh that sounds kinda weird in my opinion. Or, it sounds like I come from Lesbos, which I don't. So I think I'll stick to 'gay' for the time being.

[jazzrawr]

^ Me too. I always say gay.

Unless i'm trying to prove a point, or be dramatic. XD
If i'm being dramatic i'm like "IM A LESBIAN!" to get the point across. ^.^
But for normal usage, its 'gay'

Oh good, it's not just me!! I hate the word lesbian, just becaue I feel it is always used in such a derogatory way here in the Uk. I also really hate the word itself. It doens't sound right when I say it so I always use "gay" when describing myself.

I have noticed that most straight people use the term lesbian, except for some of the people I have come out to where I have been the first person that has come out to them. As in if I am talking about my sexuality with these people, they tend to mirror how I descirbe myself. So because I told them I am gay, they always say "gay" instead of "lesbian", which I have to admitt I really appreciate.

I don't actually think I have ever said "I am a lesbian" to anyone, or called myself a lesbian. Seriously I hate the word!! I know it's silly I just don't like it. As far as I'm concerned the people of Lesbos can have their name back!!

Gay is far nicer, I just wish it was easier to say! It still seems to take me hours of procrastinating or taking about the weather before hand to even say it to people. Probably why my coming out is taking a little time!

[heatqueen]

^I agree, I generally feel just a teensy bit awkward when someone calls me a 'lesbian', and I'm thinking, 'Dammit can't you just say gay?!' But I accept that that's natural for them so I just let them say it.

[Maddy]

I don't think I've ever referred to myself as a lesbian when talking out loud. It's always 'gay' or 'queer'. Lucy, I really thiknk you're on to something.

[MeskElil]

Well...honestly, I call myself a lesbian or use the word as an adjective instead of a noun.
I don't see it as derogatory or like a disease. It's just the word I use.
But I think I might start using "gay" because now that I think about it, "lesbian" is sort of separating women from men, and I'm all for equality of the genders. So...yeah...maybe.

[Trumpetplyer23]

Honestly, even though I'm bi, I never liked the word lesbian. It sounds so, like, weird to me. I mentioned saying "I'm lesbian" for coming out to someone, but that was just a suggestion. Doesn't mean I agree, it was just a thought, cause that's how one girl at my school came out. Just said "I'm lesbian" with no questions asked.

Anyways, back to the topic, gay is just, the word that needs to be used. Gay= homosexual. Homosexual= attracted to the same gender......People think that they need a label for everything, it gets quite annoying.

[varalhearts]

I know what you mean. Lesbian does sound like wierd. So a lot of people use the term "gay girl." Maybe their afraid? Maybe it's cooler to use gay bc some people just say that word like all the time, not even thinking of what it means. IDK. All I know is I don't really say Lesbian. It's not the word to say, especially in my house. My mom is so paranoid about it. She won't let me watch Tila Tequila for fear I might turn. OMFG!!!!!!
Straight girls say it, bc they use it like as a disease word but to put others down. That's what the girls at my school do, anyways.