This is a rather horrible scenario I thought up, but it made me curious as to what others would pick from these two choices: Would you a) rather be single for the rest of your life but have an active social life with plenty of friends, close connections to family, and good work relationships OR b) would you rather be happily married to the man/woman of your dreams but have absolutely no social life (friends), a very meaningless connection to your entire family and a work where you have colleagues that you don't really know at all. In scenario two, no one will ever try to have a meaningful connection with you (besides your dream husband/wife), but you will still interact with strangers/work colleagues, just superficially. A or B?
this is going to sound REALLY weird coming from a married man...but option A for me The only reason I am married is because I somehow found that ONE person I can tolerate in an intimate setting were something to happen to her, I would not date or marry again Foxface
Wow, both of those are better than my current state. In option a), could I have a single emotionally intimate friendship that had no sex in it? Similar to the asexual aromantic platonic partner thing? If so, I would choose option a. If not... I dunno. Can't decide.
I'd rather go for A. I don't understand what it's like to be married (so this is hypothetical), but I think that even if it is the person of your dreams, it's still one person. You're resting your entire life on one person, and even if it's the person of your dreams, will it stay that way indefinitely? Imo you need more than one person in your life- in other words, don't put all your eggs in one basket. Plus, if you get the right kind of friends, those relationships can be pretty awesome too.
I'd choose option A right on the spot! Couldn't imagine never talking to my family or friends ever again ;~;
remember in option A you still would very much so long for romance... as for me, I'm yet to decide -- they're both 2 different types of lonely.
B I'm an introvert, I could be happy with just one person. The rest of the time would go to hobbies, work and studying. That's basically how I live now, except I'm single.
Ugh... See for me the problem is I just met someone who I like and it's difficult to say since I haven't really been successful with long term relationships so I've never experienced that true romantic love outside of brief infatuation. So if you asked two weeks ago I'd have probably said A. I don't have enough data on B to make a conclusion.
If I knew what I was giving up by choosing one or the other I’d choose A. I’m not really all that social, but spending the rest of my life with only one close person can’t be easy. I guess I would be afraid of becoming bitter towards that one person when things got difficult and ending up alone in the end.
Isn't part of the theoretical situation that your partner would be in love and you would be happy forever with each other?
I'd choose A. That's my life right now. And whereas I do want to find a partner, I'd rather have my friends than just that one person. At first I'd probably have peace with having just a boyfriend because you're so in love, but in time I imagine it will get less exciting. It's funny because earlier today I was thinking of how my parents live with just each other, no friends and hobbies, and little contact with family except their kids (and I wouldn't say I have much of a bond with them). I just... can't imagine wanting to live that way. I just don't understand. What weirds me out the most is that they're my parents, and that I'm so different from them in almost every single way. It's probably why we aren't very close. I was also thinking that they probably think that I'm just living this type of life because I'm young and all, and they expect me to grow out of it soon, but nope. Even if I moved out and would be married and whatnot, I'd still want to have friends. I'd still be going out. Maybe I'd go out less, or not until the early hours, maybe drink less, whatever, but I'd still be going out. It boggles my mind I tell you. Their life seems utterly boring to me. I mean sure I respect their choice of lifestyle, it's just that I don't understand. You won't hear me complaining about it to them. They do complain about my lifestyle though, it sometimes seems like they can't ever be happy for me having a good night out. If I stay in I'll just be bored and sad. But I guess that's what they prefer. Too bad for them.
Option A sounds like my life currently. I have to say it's not that bad, although I'm very much in love with a person at the moment and it hurts. But, if I could get over that I would be perfectly fine.
B) My social life is kinda dead atm, and I don't like my family. At least I can be with someone who really really loves me, it's not like I don't have friends, but they're just friends and I want more.
A all the way, I'd rather be happy in every aspect of my life bar one, than happiness In one and emptiness in all the others.