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Hurt by a loved one?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by XingSarangBi, Jan 13, 2014.

  1. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    Have you ever had a person you love keep hurting you(emotionally) consistently while claiming to love you? It's so painful and confusing. :frowning2:
     
  2. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    Do you mean like someone i dated or just like family ?
     
  3. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    Dated. :slight_smile:
     
  4. Foster

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    My ex. Always treated me terribly (the relationship was abusive), and yet always claimed they loved me. Always cried over me. Always seemed sincere. But sometimes you have to forget what a person says and remember what they actually do. If someone does not show love, they do not love you.
     
  5. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    Here's my story then i dated a girl online we never met in real life but we exchanged pictures , she told me she really wanted to be with me and that's how we ended up dating . I remember a couple of months after having cyber sex she started to withdraw from me she would tell me she would come chat with me and never show up online and i would stay hours waiting I remember one time for her birthday i wanted to suprise her with something online and she told she would come see me and then she never showed up i was sad about it and we ended up in a fight about it and she told she just got caught up partying with her friends and lost track of time . I forgave her and we made up . One time she didn't come on to see me for months and I caught her on another site talking to other people . I asked her why she didn't come not telling her that i saw what she was doing online she lied and said that she lost electricity and how her apartment screwed up . I got mad at her called her a liar told her i saw her online and knew that she was avoiding me . I refused to talk to her then she gave me some excuse and I forgave her . But what really got me was when it was my birthday I hang out with her on the other site and she never once told me happy birthday she just ignored me the whole day , I've never forgotten her birthday and have always told her happy birthday and gave her presents ( internet stuff ) and she forgot all about me which made me so sad .
    I asked if she loves me and still wants to be with me , she told me this the truth is I don't love you anymore and only see you as my sister and i want to break up , I don't want to meet you in real life or have a relationship either I'm sorry I just see you as a friend . I got hurt and told her she used me for sex and how could she be so cruel
    she said I didn't make you fall in love with me ! , and don't you know I'm a sex addict i told you that ! . ( she never told me this ) and I said you never told me this .
    we ended up arguing back and forth me calling her a slut her calling me a childish brat and we ended our relationship her telling me she's crying because she's losing me and she still wants to be friends me crying on the floor realizing my girlfriend never loved me and used me for 2 years
     
  6. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    I'm really sorry you had to go through that.. I know it hurts a lot. Are you okay now?
     
  7. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    Sorry about that..and it was hard to accept she doesn't love me back like she says but I finally did. But now there's another problem, I can't let her go.. :'( what do I do?

    ---------- Post added 13th Jan 2014 at 11:54 AM ----------

    It's very sad when a person means a lot to you but you don't to them :icon_sad: But don't feel too bad about it..
     
  8. FireSmoke

    FireSmoke Guest

    Uhm..It's not exactly the same thing you mean but in one way on another I made me feel hurt.

    I had a crush for a (very) nice girl. We frequented the same primary school when we were children and one year ago, I decided to search her on Facebook.

    I remember every simple moment passed together, when she searched me every time she felt lonely or undecided about a thing...

    She accepted my friendship on FB after I showed a photo of me and her...but talking, she said she didn't remember me and the moments passed together.

    ---------- Post added 13th Jan 2014 at 08:57 PM ----------

    [/COLOR]
    [/QUOTE] It's very sad when a person means a lot to you but you don't to them :icon_sad: But don't feel too bad about it..[/QUOTE]

    Yeah, it's very sad but with time I tried to forget her and now I feel better :slight_smile:
     
    #8 FireSmoke, Jan 13, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 13, 2014
  9. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    Yeah, it' very sad, but with time I tried to forget her, and now I feel well :slight_smile:[/QUOTE]
    Good! :slight_smile: As I always say, life's too short to be miserable all the time! :slight_smile:
     
  10. FireSmoke

    FireSmoke Guest

    "Good! :slight_smile: As I always say, life's too short to be miserable all the time! :slight_smile:"

    You're right! :icon_bigg

    (I made a mess with my replies, sorry :icon_redf)
     
  11. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    No worries! :slight_smile:
     
  12. Foster

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    With time you will be able to let her go and move on. It's not something that is easy or that happens instantly, but eventually it will happen. Just try to keep yourself distracted (hang out with friends, start a new show, etc.) and eventually you'll meet someone else who treats you with the love you deserve (*hug*)
     
  13. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    I do try to distract myself and it kinda works but the fact that I'm trying to forget her reminds me of her! :grin: and after crying so much for so long, I'm now trying to teach myself to be less hurt by her.. I'm disappointed in her..I'm just letting her be whatever because I've tried reasoning with her so many times and it never works.. :frowning2:
    Thanks for the advice anyway! :slight_smile:
     
  14. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    Yeah i'm ok now but because of her I don't do long distance dating anymore . Plus i'm willing to move on now which makes me happy:icon_bigg
     
  15. unknown17050

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    Yes. I don't want to talk about it. :frowning2:
     
  16. toushirojaylee

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    I don't mean to be emotional but here's my story..Ex gf left me last may 2013 and I just got closure last week. Since we brokeup, we still act like a couple but commitment wasnt there anymore. I cannot accept that but it's better than not having her at all. Months passed by I kept on winning her back but still family's important to her. ( I will not argue on that, I respect that they only want what's best for their daughter-to get married and settle down with a guy) That hurts. Yeah. But that's reality. She can't fight for us. So while she's looking for a guy to settle down with (maybe) I'm still there..waiting..that maybe someday she'll come back..but she kept on making me her option. I gave everything. Love, care, material things, everything that I can just to make her feel that she doesnt have to find a real man to be happy. But still..recently I just found out she's been dating a guy from her work. I confronted her and she said it was nothing. Saw their pictures and burst out in tears. She kept on lying eventhough she knows I will find out the truth. I gave up last week. I let her go. We ended it without fighting. I just can't argue anymore. I don't have the strength to go on with winning her back when she's fallen out of love and infatuated by her officemate. It's too late. She doesnt care about me and she often ignores me these past few feeks. I told her I love her so much but still wants her to be happy and finally letting her go. I cannot stay seeing her with another man. It kills me. The end.

    -I'm still hoping that one day..she will realize how much I loved her. But I think our chapter is over. I just can't believe she moved on and she forgot about us that fast. After all that we've been through for 2 years she left me. And right now, she's happy.

    Reality sucks.

    -Oh and take note. She's been telling me she still loves me when we're together ( I can feel that )
    ..but keeps on hurting me.


    Thank you for listening guys. I'm having a hard time moving on. But I've made my decision to be a better man than to be wasted.
     
    #16 toushirojaylee, Jan 13, 2014
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2014
  17. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    This is so messed up. I've been going through more or less the same thing. But we were together for a year not two. and all I can say to you is being with her too much clouds your thinking. So step out of your box and you'll see how you've been taken advantage of. Just wait for the right person to come along. That person will love you back the way you love that person. :slight_smile: Be strong!
     
  18. Hexagon

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    Well, I was going to say my mother, but apparently that doesn't count. She's emotionally abusive.
     
  19. toushirojaylee

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    (*hug*)(&&&)(*hug*) We need this. From the start I know she's taking advantage of me..but it didn't matter before because we're inlove. But now I feel like a trash..moving on..I think she's happy now. It's been a week..No communication at all. I know I'll never love this way again but hopefully right woman comes along in the future..be strong too!We'll be fine soon!:slight_smile:

    (*hug*)
     
  20. XingSarangBi

    XingSarangBi Guest

    Me, it's been three days. :slight_smile: It's hard because she's not letting go. she says she can't even though 'we'll never work out' ... :frowning2: anyway.. keep that up and you'll be fine! *hugs*

    ---------- Post added 15th Jan 2014 at 01:04 PM ----------

    I'm really sorry :frowning2: hugs to you too.. but do explain emotionally abusive..