Do you correct people who assume you are straight?

Well, I honestly do not think she meant any offense to it. Now, I wouldn't have corrected her because that is just none of her business, but what I would have done is if I had a partner I would have looked at him once and called him baby, if I knew that he would be okay with that. That way I wouldn't have corrected her, but she would have realized that we were more than friends.

 

We had an incident like that on Black Friday. My boyfriend and I went to Barnes and Noble and we were looking for the LGBT section, and thought it would be in the "Sexuality" section, but no luck. This late-teens/early-20's girl who worked there came up to us and said, "So, are you guys looking for something fun to try with your girlfriends?"

My boyfriend says, "No actually we're looking for the gay and lesbian section."

The girl was like : :jawdrop:

 

Ok that is awesome that he would say that.

 

Some people are clueless (maybe they lived a very sheltered life so far?). I'm also wondering in the case of the bank that they have a policy to not assume things (i.e. the account in the computer probably doesn't show a "couple" relationship so it could possibly be two roommates who have a joint account for groceries utilities etc). I'd put money on clueless, but, without knowing how "obvious" or "stereotypical" you both are, maybe she's
a- not taking chances of being screamed at by two straight girls engaged to their boyfriends
b- not taking chances of "outing" two lesbians and causing them distress in a public place, possibly knowing other employees or customers nearby aren't so open minded

 

That girl should have just shut up, but I doubt she meant any harm. She sounds completely clueless.

You could have smiled at your wife and back at the girl and said, "Actually, we're married. "

 

I would have corrected her. I'm sure she meant no harm but still, I would want everyone to know that my significant other is indeed my significant other and not just a friend

 

No I don't I want to but I don't because i'm not ready to come out yet and I'm worried people will treat me different once they know I'm a lesbian plus I hate hearing the but your too pretty or femme to be a lesbian .

 

I never correct people who assume I'm straight. I live in a society where homosexuality is not only immoral but illegal.

 

I do, if the opportunity actually arises. But being multisexual, it usually doesn't. People talk about a hypothetical future girlfriend. If I were gay, I'd say, "No, actually, I like guys." But I can't exactly say, "Well, I do like girls, but I don't like you assuming I'm heterosexual, I'm bi/pan so it might be a boyfriend instead." No, it just doesn't work. But if someone says something like "You're straight/not gay, right?" I'll correct them.

 

It depends on who they are. If it was a family member I wasn't ready to tell, then no. But I'm fine with anybody else knowing. I even got asked once if I was a lesbian. I guess it's better than being asked if I'm straight.

As for the lady at the bank, I agree with what others are saying. She probably didn't mean any harm by it. It is annoying, but try not to take any personal offense to it.

 

Depends on the situation.
If they present me to people as being straight, or in any other way directly express the belief that I'm straight to me, I will correct them.

If they ask me if I have a girlfriend however, I'm not going necesarilly tell them I'm bi/pan.
Basically, I don't come out to people anymore, unless they directly ask or misrepresent me. Sexuality isn't something you should have to reaffirm everytime imo.

---------- Post added 15th Jan 2014 at 10:45 PM ----------

Basically ^this^.
Thanks for reminding me to read the preceding posts Hexagon. :icon_wink

 

I do not.

This would only occur in situations that are of such short exposure that it's pointless, so I let them assume whatever they want to assume. And some of the comments about my "wife and kids" are pretty funny. On a few occasions, I've wanted to just to jolt someone, but I wonder if that would be immature.

In situations where people actually know a little bit about me, they know my age and always single status, that they probably assume otherwise and have even make snide comments that corrections are not necessary.

 

Nope, but I'm not out, so...

It can be a little awkward/slightly annoying to hear 'girlfriend' comments but I just brush them off.

 

Reminds me of those shirts that say "I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is."

I don't correct anyone's presumptions of my "future" heterosexual life, but I will sometimes try to use gender-neutral language in such conversations. If they ask, "Do you want to have kids one day?" I might say, "Well it depends on what my future spouse and I decide." Things like this help me maintain the veil of "straightness" while maintaining the dignity of not overtly lying.

Even as I become more open on my sexuality," I won't necessarily correct everyone who assumes I'm straight. It will be based on how "safe" I feel based on the circumstances.

 

It really irritates me when people assume I'm straight! But like Hexagon said, being multisexual it's hard to explain to people. I want to say "Well I like girls too...." or "I could also have a girlfriend." But it's just hard to get people to understand. I just don't know what to do....

 

Well, no. It doesn't make sense for me personally, since without having any work done, I just look like a heterosexual woman when with my boyfriend, but am always assumed to be a lesbian otherwise.

In your case though, I'm sure she didn't mean any harm. That doesn't make it less frustrating though. Is it just me, or are lesbian couples always assumed to just be bffs forevers? I've seen this happen 99.9% of the time with my lesbian friends, butch or femme. I've only ever seen it happen 2% of the time with my gay friends.

 

For me it depends on who it is that is assuming I'm straight. If they're foreign or older and don't really understand, I'll just play along with whatever they're saying. Sometimes people assume my girlfriend and I are sisters. Yeah, awkward...

Otherwise I have corrected them, or a friend who's with us has corrected them. It doesn't really offend me though. That's not always something people think of right away.

 

With as much sarcasm as possible.. x3