Long Distance Relationship: Does it works?

Never "date" someone you can't interact with in person within 48 hours of "meeting" them online, is my new mantra for 2014.

This following a "relationship" that extended for a whole two weeks before meeting, leading to the inevitably crushed expectations and leaving me holding my dick in my hands.

However, YMMV.

 

It depends on the individuals in the relationship.

Is it possible to make it work? Yes.

Is it possible to spend the rest of your life with that person? Yes.

Is it easy? No.

Will it be painful at times? Yes.

Will you be crying? Yes.

There are many positive and negative things with having a long distance relationship. On one hand you get to know a person from talking so much with them. But you don't see those small flaws that you would if you were around them in person. And you'll never know a person fully until you have lived under the same roof with them, it's first at that point you'll notice every single detail.

Long distance relationships can build up a very strong bond, and if you make it to the finish line you'll have a very strong and stable relationship. But there are so many temptations and small holes that you might end up falling down in on the way there.

It's risky and can be really painful, but to some people it was worth it.

I have been in two long distance relationships. They are some of the most fond memories and times i have experienced, and i don't regret it for a second. I'm glad and feel lucky that i got to experience such a wonderful time.

 

Well my best friend lives here in Dominican Republic, and his girlfriend lives in Peru. And they met randomly internet.... They have 4 years in a relationship, he visited her once, and she visited him once too... They are planning to reunite again.

So, yes it can work... But not for everyone, they connect almost daily to talk, also it helps that my friend is kind of good at communicating by chat. I dont imagine how can this kind of relationship can be mantained if one of the 2 persons is. Awkard at chatting.

 

It CAN work, and if the opportunity came up again, frankly I think I'd take it. You miss out on the physical aspects, but actually if you value the mental sides of a relationship highly then long distance can still be rewarding.

I find the biggest problem comes when you actually DO get to spend time with each other. When you DO get to meet up, the chances are you will try and make it worth the distance travelled. That could mean you go from not spending any physical time with this person to a full week. It's so easy to run out of things to do in that time...

 

Depends on the couple, if both people are committed I think they can make it work.

 

I've been in successful and not successful LDRs (long distance relationship). It depends on the people. It requires all the stuff you need for a CD (close distance) relationship, except it is all a bit more important. Things like honest, for example. You have to be able to trust the person you are far away from. You also have to be very creative about 'dates'. Remember, you can't see each other in person, but you still need that 'get to know you period'. Watch movies together, read books together, talk on skype, there are a lot of fun date ideas for LDRs. If you're interested, PM me I can give you more info.

I was with a guy who needed that physical connection and couldn't handle being apart from me. He also turned out to be a control freak, so that was part of it.

The important thing to remember about LDRs, is that they can't last forever. They're expensive (traveling), and come with all the normal ups and downs that a relationship goes through. LDRs are just as rewarding as CD relationships, though. I've enjoyed them.

Some positive aspects to them is that you get a lot of space. If you are focusing on something (School, or a career), sometimes LDRs are easier because there is not a person physically there demanding time. The more successful relationships I've had have been built on understanding, and creativity.

Also, both parties need to be invested. If one person is only half in, it can get very bumpy. One person cannot carry a LDR.

My current SO and I are in a long distance relationship. Pennsylvania to North Carolina. The bonus is we live in the same time zone. Time zones can be a bear.

 

Not for me the women I were with never wanted to come see me I don't know why maybe I should have listen to that other lesbian that said having cyber sex takes out the excitement
and then they don't care to come see you

 

I guess it COULD work if you're able to swing it. I have several pen-pals, but I coupd never develop a romantic, sexual bond like I would with someone within 50 miles of me.

 

I think it depends. If you're able to meet a few times a year, use technologies to keep in touch though ordinary and creative ways, are both invested in the relationship, and consider the long distance aspect to be temporary should the relationship strengthen, then I don't see why not. If both parties are in the same country, I think that's a real bonus. If both parties are in the early stages of life preoccupied with schooling and training, that might help too. I'm not too keen on LDRs, but if I find that one guy that seems like a solid match, I'd consider my options carefully.

 

I *definitely* depends on the people involved. Some people can't seem to form a bond, or trust, or whatever, in order to try long-distance. Some people need the reassurance that comes from being about to see the other face to face, physical contact, knowing that they aren't that far away if something should happen, etc.

But it *does* work, sometimes short term and sometimes longer. Personally, I've been in multiple long-distance relationships, the longest one lasted a little over 3 years. We didn't meet face to face until we'd been officially dating for 4 months. We dealt with the distance, through long emails and chat sessions, loooong late-night phone calls, even playing multi-player online games together just to "be" together. She did eventually move here and move in with me (then moved back home 6 months later after breaking up with me), but most of it was long distance and visiting every 4-5 months or so. And it really did work well for a long time.

I feel the need to mention that one of my best friends has been married for 23 years, and because of her husband's job she sees him 20-40 days a year. (Literally, she actually keeps track each year, seeing if he'll "break the record" for time spent home). I don't know if it'd be considered a "long-distance relationship" since he "lives" here, but they do spend the majority of the year apart. And it's worked so far!

 

totally depends.

i dated my ex before meeting in person for about 3 weeks ish. ex lived 3 hours away and we made it work, so its not as difficult as your situation but its totally down to the two people involved. what is right for one couple isnt the same for another

 

It works if both people are committed and have plans on moving in together at some point. I don't think indefinitely long distance relationships would work out well though.

 

I'm not a pessimist but based on personal experience, no.