(Apologies for the long post but I hope you read this and it means something to some of you. Cause this took ages to type :lol If you want to be successful and achieve your goals in life, you have to be prepared to sacrifice. What are you willing to give up to get what you want? Is it sleep? Time on your phone or PC? Nights out? Friendships? Holidays? Maybe even alcohol or drugs? One reason you might not be able to give up something you love is because you're worried about doing it and you're fretting over what MIGHT happen if you do. You'll never taste the success of fulfilling your dream or reaching your goal if you don't take risks. If you don't put some of the things you love aside, in order to reach something greater, you will never know what could have been. And you will hurt inside. You will hurt because those things you love are the very things holding you back and you know it now. We need to be more aware of the hours we spend on the phone, on social media sites, in pubs or clubs, on watching TV, you name it. And I'm not talking about society as a whole, I'm talking about you and me. I'm talking about the people I've seen on here who have been posting saying they are not getting what they want out of life. Why am I posting this now? I recently gave up alcohol cold turkey. An addiction of mine which was holding me back. I also recently moved out of my parents into my own place. My perspective on life has changed drastically. I know now what's been holding me back, it's all of the things I listed above. Only now I've got the guts to know I've been screwing up my life and not getting what I deserve, what I am capable of achieving. We are ALL capable of achieving our goals. The only thing holding you back, is you.
Thank you it's still early days and it's not easy cause everyone I know still drinks but I'll get there! This is the year for change Also I realise there is a lot more to achieving goals than just time management, I'm testing the water with this.
You talk a lot of sense! Yes, you could say it is sacrifice. I prioritise. Enjoyment is low on my list yet it must be observed otherwise life is no fun. Everyone has to relax sometimes to regain strength. People make huge sacrifices when they start their own businesses. Watching The Apprentice as a teen inspired me to grab life by the horns! I haven't started my own business, but I stopped much procrastinating! I'd also like to say congratulations on beating alcohol and keep it up! I used to drink a lot more than I do now. I realised I had a problem when I was thinking about my next drink more than video games or even food. It shocked me. I managed to seriously cut down within a week. I think some people are more prone to alcohol addiction, I'm one of the lucky ones.
I'm sorry, but I hate it when people try to say that "the only thing holding you back is you". When it' simply untrue. I want to transition. That requires therapist visits, hormones, and surgery. I'm more than willing to sit through emotional pain of digging through my past. I'm willing to sit through physical pain of healing from surgery. I won't get to until I'm after 30. Am I holding me back? No. Shitty insurance is holding me back. Lack of money is holding me back. Transphobic family is holding me back. And sacrifice? I'm tired of sacrifices. Just to get my associates degree, I've sacrificed time, social interaction, the idea of friends, and part of my sanity. I'm getting ready to do it again for another four years. I still have more sacrifices to make, too. When I transition, there's a good chance I'll sacrifice my family. My home. Everything I've ever known. Not everyone has their issues because of inaction, and it's foolish to think that way. In many cases, they're unable to get out of the situation because they have no options. But, then again, I suppose we can all wave a magic wand and achieve it.
In most cases it is inaction (especially in this generation of entitlement) but there are plenty people who have too much on their shoulders. In your case life dealt you a bad hand and you're making the most of it. You struck a chord because I'm afraid of my disorder getting worse and then me feeling useless. I was gonna say something to that effect in my earlier post but I forgot.
All of that is sort of true, but idealism must be tempered with a little bit of realism. The main reason people like these sorts of messages is because it motivates them, and motivation is undeniably important. But motivation is not the entire process. 9 times out of 10, luck is a major factor as far as I'm concerned. The sacrifice is for maximizing your chances of success.
Let me start by saying I think you must have missed my post above where I said I know there is more to it than that. There's more to it than time management. I couldn't quite cover everything in one post, so I apologise if you misunderstood and jumped to conclusions about my beliefs. I'm afraid it still holds true though to some extent, it's always a factor. The process you are undergoing isn't easy and it isn't quick I realise that. However if you didn't have the will power to do what you have to do, to sacrifice what you've already sacrificed and be willing to sacrifice more, you'd never get there. You have to remember that everything you're working for is coming to you, it is, but you can't quit during the process. It has nothing to do with magic wands, but it has all to do with you. If lack of money is holding you back then you need to make THAT your goal to overcome. Small steps towards the final realisation of your goal. You say a transphobic family is holding you back, I say your haters can't hold you back. You need to let go of that hate, let it wash over you. They're the narrow-minded ones, they're the ones who have the problem, not you. The sooner you learn to, perhaps not forgive, but for the mean time let it go, the sooner you will see that it won't bother you any more. And if you have to sacrifice that transphobic family then so be it, it's your dream not theirs. Perhaps one day they'll understand. There's always options. We just need to dig a little deeper inside ourselves if we can't change our surroundings. And more forward from there. I wish you all the best. ---------- Post added 18th Jan 2014 at 12:09 PM ---------- As I mentioned above, I know there's more to it than what I've covered here. This is just a basic premise to make people think more about their situation. I personally believe you make your own luck. Sitting around waiting for an opportunity to come along will leave you broke and your dreams unfulfilled. If you don't get out there and DO something to make progress towards your goal, then the chances are you'll never get that "lucky break" we all want.
actually Tyrael is right, I think alot of people are stuck on the concept rather than actually taking time to think deeply into the big picture the concept is not an 'event', its a 'process' the bad responses are just excuses because you're scared about the price you pay for an alternative reality where you might actually be happy, compared to god knows how many regrets made and the fear that it was not worth it.
...I already have things planned out. However, it entirely relies on getting into university which is absolutely out of my hands. I fill out the paperwork, do the interviews, and hope for the best. The haters certainly can hold me back. I've been threatened with being kicked out, although I don't know if it was just an empty, rage filled threat or not. However, it's not something I can risk with no where to go. I'm already prepared to let you go. My entire point is that I'm sick of having to make sacrifices. I've done it my entire life. Or perhaps I know my situation better than you do, and it has nothing to do with being "scared" and everything to do with realism.
you're right, I dont know your situation, and you probably have alot of obstacles, but never get that mixed up with the things you can control, because its very easy to go from self handicapping which is an excuse in itself, to a complete disaster.
