Dunno if this is the right place to post this, so mods move it if you have to. So, I went out with a friend for drinks last night since my partner was working overtime and she shared some...interesting news with me. She think she is bisexual. I'm prob gonna direct here to this website for some advice, but....I'm wondering if I handled the situation well. She is in a long-term relationship with her bf of 4 years. They have been talking marriage. I've known this woman for years and NEVER have I ever suspected her of liking women. I knew that about 6-7 months ago her bf talked her into a threesome with a woman he knew. She called me when he asked her to do it and she was reluctant because she didn't like women "that way" I told her say no, but she did it anyway to please him. Then she called me 2 days after saying it was the "best sex of her life" (her words not mine) and said "she doesn't want to like women". They fooled around as a threesome a couple of times and that was the that. I thought that was the end of it. I'm assuming her bf thought so to. Apparently the last few months she has been hooking up with this woman behind his back, though he knows they are friends and thinks they are just that. And when I say hooking up....my friend is NOT a pillow princess. She is fully active in this sexual relationship. She told me she loves her boyfriend but really likes this woman. A lot. The woman tried to convince her to go on vacation to the caribbean with her and offered to pay (apparently this woman has money) and thats when her bf got suspicious and told her no, she wasnt going anywhere with this woman. I told her that its okay to be bi, but she can't cheat on her bf like that, and that she shouldn't mess up a happy relationship over sex. Especially since her bf has a kid that is really attached to her and they are considering getting married. I dunno. Did I handle that right? I mean I basically told her to drop the woman and stick with her bf. :help:
In my opinion you said the right thing. You made sure to let her know that being bi is totally fine. But as you said cheating on her boyfriend isn't right. Nobody deserves to be lied to and be betrayed. If she wants to maintain her relationship with the woman she has to at least come clean with her boyfriend, but needs to be aware of the consequences in regard of her relationship. Don't sweat it, you reacted good =)
Basically, what you told her was to be a human being first and a bisexual second. Definitely nothing wrong with that. That said, the cynic in me is hearing distant death peals for this relationship. Sounds like this experience with a woman has awakened something latent within her and she may feel compelled to explore it further, to the expense of her status quo. Hope the guy is reserving at least the back of his mind for this possibility. Also not familiar with the term "pillow princess". What does that mean?
I think you handled it well. Your friend is free to explore her attraction to women if she wants to, but she has to be open and honest with her boyfriend beforehand, and she should understand that in this case it might not be compatible with their relationship. The fact that she went behind his back in the first place suggests that your friend probably isn't ready for marriage.
Boyfriend coerces her into a threesome, loses her to the woman. That would be amusing. Anyway, I think you handled that fine. I haven't really got experience in that area though.
Wow she probably really is bi if she's doing it behind his back that's how men lose their women sometimes I've always warned my straight male friends against this 3some stuff but they never listen . I think you gave her the best advice she needs to stop seeing this woman if she wants to stay with her boyfriend it's not fair to her boyfriend or this woman she's seeing behind her back . She needs to choose who she wants .
