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Was my mom trying to get me to not be a lesbian ?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by stocking, Feb 1, 2014.

  1. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    I was thinking back today and I remember my mom use to give me these random articles to read that were about lesbians one was about this lesbian couple that lived in secret for years and they explained how they met each other and became a couple and grew old together , I remember saying how she was disgusted by it and she didn't understand how two women could love each other another time she read something in a magazine about Bill de blasio's wife and how she was a lesbian and she married a bill and fell in love with him . I remember my mom was saying I don't get how a woman can say she's lesbian then be with a man maybe she wasn't really gay she was doing it because it was cool or to get attention . I didn't answer but thought it was an interesting article . Now I'm looking back and thinking did my mom know I was gay and is this why she gave me these articles to read . I remember one time she threatened me and ask me if I was a lesbian and she said if you are I want you to call everyone right now and tell them your a lesbian . I ended up crying and asked her to stop and told her I was not a lesbian . I wasn't ready to come out then and today I'm not ready either . I've even heard my mom say to my dad's cousin that she can not stand how gay people wait til later in life to tell their parents that their gay and that they should do it right away and save them the punishment and suffering later . Now for some reason my mom thinks I'm with men but hiding it from her and told my dad she thinks I'm having sex with guys ? but she seems to no longer give me those articles . I'm glad for now that she thinks I'm straight it gives me a good hiding spot and she no longer questions me anymore but one thing that I forgot to add is when I was a teen I didn't dress very feminine because use to be pretty depressed back then and didn't care about how I looked and also I was made fun of by a guys for dressing feminine because I had small breasts I guess my mom thought I was lesbian because of this and now I dress very feminine and she never questions me anymore .So I'm thinking was those articles her way of showing she's not ok with me being a lesbian ?
     
  2. ShadowSpirit26

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    Most likely. You really need to get far away from her once you're able to, because from everything you said about her even in other threads, she seems like she won't stop until she drags you all the way down and finds a way to keep you there. I doubt she cares about your happiness at all, even if you put aside the homophobia.
     
  3. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    I agree I'm thinking that I will probably live on my own and finish college living with her is stressful :dry: