while i am a lesbian, this info is for a friend. he was asked out by a girl (keep in mind we are in a high school in the south) he is gay and in the closet but out to me, another friend and his family. he doesn't want to come out to anyone. how should he go about this situation without sounding like a jerk?
I have the same problem and it annoys me like no other . What I started doing now is tell men I have a boyfriend or I'm not looking for a relationship and i'm not into dating right now . you can also say i'm seeing someone the men I'm around are pretty persistent so I go with the I'm seeing someone or dating someone
Simple, tell them you're not interested. You don't have to give them a reason, but if you feel the need, or if they press on, you can say you're taken, not looking for a relationship at the moment, or not into their type. It's better to give the other person a flat out "no" rather than leading them on with false hope.
I had this problem in high school when I was still closeted. I still recall one girl wanting me to go to the prom with her. I just used the excuse "I'm very flattered but I'm involved with someone else" They would typically drop it after that. Nowadays, I just tell them I'm gay. I know your friend doesn't want to come out right now, but he will be so much happier and at ease with himself when he does. It really is like a weight being lifted off one's shoulders. Being smack dab in the middle of Bible Belt country as you say makes it that much more difficult. I would have him look into LGBT alliance groups once you graduate just so he can feel connected with other people in the community and not feel so alone. Best of luck to both of you
Yeah, just turn them down gently. You don't have to come out- plenty of straight people get turned down/cock blocked all the time and their reasons can be as stupid as man hands. You just say "Sorry, not interested" or "With someone else- not gonna work" or the stand-by "Gee, got a lot to do- turns out my grandmother is having gallbladder surgery on that same night, now that you mention it and someone has to take care of her. She disowned my uncle, you know, and someone has to win the inheritance..."