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Are my friends just jerks or immature?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Lcfcfox, Mar 4, 2014.

  1. Lcfcfox

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    Lately especially this school year some of my friends have become seriously homophobic, I haven't even come out and they decide to call me names which would be used to offend a homosexual person. I honestly dislike this should I just tell them to stop as it's really annoying? (*hug*):help:
     
  2. KanayaMaryam

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    I'd say jerks, no offense, but if they're gonna make fun of you and make you feel horrible, they're not friends. I'd say tell them it offends you. >_<
     
  3. Simple Thoughts

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    I'd tell them to back off or find a new friend.
     
  4. Kasey

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    Be like why all the hate?
     
  5. finlandwrc

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    Tell them and if it doesn't stop they aren't worth your time
     
  6. Argentwing

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    Given your age, I don't think the issue's so hopeless that you should ditch them and get new friends. They just need to be shown that they are blindly insulting something because of irrational preconceived notions. If you tell them you're gay (or at least fully support LGBT if you don't want to come out) and they continue, it's time to give them a break from your attention and wait for their apology.
     
  7. GeeLee

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    Call them out on it, if you don't like their answer and/or they continue then get new friends.
     
  8. Sorceress of Az

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    well they don't sound like friends if they are being mean to you.
     
  9. Amazo

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    you said... u haven't come out to them.. but if you tell them it offends you, they will find out your gay, but who know's maybe they aren't too smart to realize that they are saying bad words and they meant to joke around, but instead they are hurting you. Its up to you tell them that's offending you, but they could find out that you're gay and they might say sorry and be friends again ? your choice buddy.
     
  10. Jacob D

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    just tell them you don't like it and tell them to stop. or you could ignore their immature comments. or you could find better friends.
     
  11. Lcfcfox

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    I guess that's a good idea considering it doesn't have to involve me coming out :icon_bigg
    The other suggestions would work as well but this could give me the opportunity to keep friends and stop them harassing me.
    (*hug*)
     
  12. MessieM

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    I'm afraid that England, where I'm from too, is a pretty homophobic place, and the age that you're/we're at then it is a particularly tense atmosphere to be in when your LGBTQ+ when anti-gay comments are being bandied about like the time of day.

    I don't think I go through a single day without hearing at least one person use a LGBTQ+ name or label derogatorily... but I don't tend to let it bother me. I know that if they all knew that I was bi... and if they actually matured a bit and started thinking about other people... then they would at the very least tone it down.

    I'll just say that you don't have to come out if your not ready... but you could try and say something to counteract it. Like "Have you seen that documentary on channel 4 Hunting Season? I can not believe people in Russia, or anywhere on the planet, could be so abusive and violent to another human being that has done nothing wrong." or something like that.

    Or a nice simple "Shut up" might do the trick :wink:
     
  13. sam the man

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    There's a good chance they're being immature and if they're in a group there could be an element of group mentality at play. Do any of them ever make these remarks to you if they haven't got someone else there to back them up? If not, perhaps they don't believe in the things they're saying as much as they're letting on. Nevertheless, it's still jerky behaviour whether or not they're immature. I'd say try and gently challenge their views first, as they're probably just saying things out of ignorance, and if they won't change their views then just try and associate with some new people and "drift away" from them (i'm not saying completely blank them btw). There's no need to jump right into overt confrontation with them when you can try other, softer approaches to begin with imo.
     
  14. Pret Allez

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    I don't think there's a substantially appreciable difference between a jerk and someone who is immature.