I work in a small office (state assemblyman's office), I have only 3 co-workers. For a while I had only two co-workers, one guy and one girl (my boss), neither of which I felt comfortable coming out to. There are 3 desks in the main office, I was sitting at one of them while the other 2 had the remaining desks. But last month we got a new girl. Initially I thought I would resent her because she took my desk and I got my moved to a separate office. But she has become my favorite co-worker. She frequently talks about her gay guy friend who calls himself a "faggolo". Now with the way I dress and act, I sort of think I live in a glass closet at work. But for whatever reason I don't think they think I am gay. I never talk about my personal life. I play it very coy. But last Tuesday, I told all 3 people in the office that I was going to an organic restaurant in Manhattan. I said nothing about who I was going with or anything, and they didn't ask. Of course I was going on a date with a guy, and I ended up spending the night at this place (I am off from work Wednesdays). When I came into work, it was only this one girl there. She asked how the restaurant was, and I said it was expensive, but I didn't pay a cent, because he picked up the tab. That pronoun "he", plus the idea of him paying for me, did the trick. So I subtly came out to her. She asked me if it was like a first date and I said yes and then proceeded her to tell her all about him and the date. Then we discussed some other guys I've dated. There was never even a look of shock or surprise on her face, it was just natural conversation. She never asked and I never flat out said "I'm gay", but I'm pretty sure the message got through when I'm telling her about a date with a guy and how I ended up going home with him and throwing up in his bed. :lol: It still feels weird, I've never really come out to anyone before except my mother (and obviously I'm out with guys I've dated). When I got home later I was like WTF did I just do. But now it just feels amazing to be out to just one person I see on daily basis outside the house. Although I still don't feel comfortable coming out to my other 2 co-workers, it does feel like a great first step toward being comfortable with who I am. :newcolor:
Good for you! That's pretty much the way I come out to people now - just drop it into a conversation and then continue the conversation. It feels so natural and doesn't really feel like coming out at all (but you have). You sometimes get a momentary pause that confirms the other persons understanding, but I find it works well. Onwards and upwards!
Well yes, though I enjoyed being a tease for so long, exhibiting stereotypical 'gay' traits, while remaining silent whenever gay things were brought up (except for the time I debated the two other co-workers who agreed with the ban on gay marchers in the St. Patrick's Day parade). The new girl who does scheduling was scheduling the GLSEN Day of Silence and asked what "GLSEN" is, I replied "Gay Lesbian Straight Education Network" in like 2 seconds. I came into work one day wearing my hot pink girls' leggings and pink Converse. I know that the other 2 co-workers just think I am "ultra-liberal" and think that just explains why I know about "gay" things and have progressive views on LGBTQ issues. I guess I will continue to be a tease with the other 2 co-workers, while the one girl is privy to my 'secret'.
So today I had alone time in the office with her again. I discussed with her the details of my recent dating (the Jewish pedophile with the Nazi fetish), I showed her his crazy YouTube videos. She joked that she's going to be screening all my dates from now on- or at least, I think she was joking. :lol: Later on I had a long text chat with her. I went a little TMI describing the time the Jewish pedo guy told me to keep my cardigan sweater and tie on when I gave him a blowjob cuz I looked like a "schoolboy". She liked the TMI tho. In the middle of the conversation, I did finally work the g-word in...she said she was a "honest and a shoot-shooter", so I said I strive to be a "honest and a straight-shooter too, well not straight, but honest and a gay shooter. " She then went on to say I was "gay and funny" and "that's a great combo". Then she's like "gay guys are a crowd favorite with girls" cuz girls are "caddy and in competition with each other" (I assume she meant catty) and with gay guys "we know you're not trying to get into our pants." So perhaps I've found a girlfriend.