Ignorant straight guys get on my nerves >.<

Yeah, it seems like some guys think every woman wants their dick! :/

 

Lol wut? That makes no sense...Was he trolling or being serious?

 

Trolling or not, a lot of men are freaking douchebags to lesbians (Not bashing the respectful men obviously). They just make me more gay than I was before :/

 

You mean that straight men have an entitlement complex about women? Who knew.

Yeah, it is horrible. It's disgusting, and is a result of reducing women to sexual objects or their entire being as nothing unless in relation to a man. I don't think that man (like many others) can think of women as sexually independent.

Whether or not he says he's trolling or not, he's almost certainly a horrible person. Either way, he believes what he says. It's just if it's a joke to him, that means he thinks it's funny to delegitimise gay women.

 

Looking at past threads of yours on issues like this, I think you're easy to get riled up on the 'beliefs' these people online keep talking about. I bet most are trolling you due to that, then in return you post threads about it and say <insert adjective> <insert sexuality> <insert gender (typically male)> are saying these things.

Just let it go or else you're going to just needlessly stress yourself out. Save your energy for people who you can be sure legitmately hold those kind of views.

 

NO GUYS THINK ABOUT IT LESBIANS ARE JUST TRANSGENDERS IN DISGUISE AND THEY CAN'T HAVE THEIR OWN PENIS SO THEY NEED ONE INSIDE THEM hurrdurr

 

I personally think that he is the one being insecure. I think guys like that can't stand the fact that there are women out there who would never want "them". These type of morons like to think all women want someone like them inside them. It's like a ego or power thing.

Maybe they are intimidated or feel it a threat to their masculinity. Regardless, it doesn't give them the right to act like complete knob heads.

If you get into a conversation like that again just say, "with dicks like you around, I don't really need dick myself as it's enough just talking to you".

Happy days

 

I understand how you feel stocking so don't apologize. I went through a lot too, to the point I feel like I have inner heterophobic feelings now (Not in the way that "I hate straight people" but in the way that "seeing a straight couple or knowing someone who identifies as straight gives me a massive panic attack").

I'm so scared of heteronormativity that It's like a huge anxiety trigger goes off whenever I see it.

It is so sad what people put us though.

 

Then told me he doesn't get why lesbians use dildos and strap ons it doesn't feel like the real thing and it's not a good alternative

WARNING: I'm about to defend this guy, so, you know, have fun with that.

OK so I think this sentence needs some defending, because even if this guy was trolling I know this is something a lot of people really do find confusing and for some reason nobody seems to bother to explain it to them without first telling them how they should get their heads out of their judgemental straight asses.


Now a lot of people, seriously LOADS of people will ask this question because they genuinely don't understand why you would want to use a strap on, and actually this is something similar that came up while I was initially questions what would happen in regards to sex when I recognized my gender.

Now one of the big concerns for me when I realised that I am female was my penis. Specifically, what the hell good was it now. I came to the following realisations. I can derive pleasure from it, and currently not opposed to receiving oral or hand stuff, BUT I never want to penetrate someone with it because I WOULD FEEL LIKE A MAN. I've put that in bold because it's important and I will come back to it, just keep in in the back of your mind for now.

Now you may also know that just like you can get female sex toys, the exist for males too. You can get hold of a 'male masturbator' that is supposed to simulate the feeling of a vagina. I own a couple of these from before I realised my gender. I can still get a lot of pleasure from using them. I enjoy the feeling I get from simulated straight sex, even though I would never want to engage in it. Again, this is important so please remember it.

Now a lot of people will look at a lesbian couple using a strap-on and their immediate thoughts will go something like this.

Strap-on is being used where the penis would be used.
It's being used in a way that I recognize as sex.
But they are lesbians.
Therefore they must be trying to simulate straight sex.

That is how it goes for a lot of people. It's always going to because most people think exclusively in terms of straight sex ESPECIALLY STRAIGHT PEOPLE.

Now the difference is that you don't think that way. For you, a strap-on dildo isn't a replacement for a penis, it's just a toy.

For you, having penetrative sex isn't recreating a straight sex act, it's just using a toy to have lesbian sex.

You know, in the same way I can get pleasure from using my penis the way it is usually used, you can feel pleasure using your vagina the same way. But neither of us see it that way because we aren't thinking exclusively about straight sex!

I couldn't use my penis for straight sex, because I am not a man. You couldn't use your vagina for straight sex because you aren't straight. But we can both still get pleasure from the act if it's done in a way that is comfortable for us. For me, I can use a fake female part and I can pretend its mine, but if I tried with an actual girl I'd feel really uncomfortable. For you, you can get pleasure with another girl because your vagina still WORKS, but with a guy you would feel uncomfortable.

Thing is, you can't expect people who have no reason to ever think that hard about non-straight sex to think about things the same way you and I do, not immediately anyway. People relate the things they see to things they already understand.

 

"All you need is a good dicking."

All that you need is a 1billion volt tazer down your throat. That should fix your ignorance.

 

You're right, and I'm not defending what he said.

But that's the thing, you know, if he is sitting there thinking that you are using it as a replacement for the real thing OF COURSE he's going to tell you it's better.

I mean think of it without thinking about sex.

Imagine in want somebody to fix my vintage VW van. But instead of just restoring it this guy takes it away, guts off the roof, puts a big-ass spoiler on the back and replaces the bench seating in the back with a hot tub.

Now I'm going to feel inclined to call him out on his bullshit.

Now imagine I see someone else go in with their VW van. They come out with the same shitty spoiler and that same fucking hot tub. This guy is THRILLED.

Now as far as I can see he's totally ruined the only decent car I know of. If I'm feeling confrontational I might tell him that the originals look better and that his version is shit. He would have been much better off just getting it restored instead of how he has it.

That's basically what we are looking at here.

I think he's destroyed a beautiful van. He thinks he's had some amazing work done.
He thinks you're doing 'straight sex' wrong. You don't think you're doing straight sex at all, you're doing lesbian sex with a toy.

 

Well that COULD have something to do with the way guys are brought up.

So you are no doubt aware that for a guy, showing ANY kind of affection towards another guy is a bad thing. I mean you can't even compliment another guys haircut without everyone assuming you are gay. So to most guys, you grow up with this idea that if you compliment someone, there must be some level of attraction. You can see evidence of this in the fact that most guys will only compliment a girl if he is attracted to them. You won't usually get a guy complimenting a girl on her outfit or hair if he doesn't want something.

So now imagine that is what you've grown up with and you are now looking at a group of girls. Now your average group of girls will compliment each other and guys notice this. Now what they also notice is that most of these girls are not gay.

So in the male world, you have 'compliment = gay' and in the female world you have 'compliment =/= gay', or at least you do in the mind of a growing boy.

So what you wind up with is a whole bunch of guys who are taught the following from birth:

-Boys like girls and vice versa (keep in mind teaching diverse relationships to children is STILL not common practice and it certainly wasn't when most of the guys you are thinking of grew up).

-Guy compliments mean something

And they learn the following through observation:

-Girl compliments don't mean anything

So now enter your hypothetical lesbian.

Our guy knows 2 things.

1. Boys like girls
2. Girls show 'affection' but it doesn't mean anything.

So you end up with a girl who says she likes girls, and your guy is left remembering what he learned in the playground. Girls compliment each other and it doesn't mean anything, so that's probably still true.

Then he remembers what he learned from a young age. Girls like boys. That is a girl, and I'm a boy...

Now the thing is at this point our hypothetical girl stops being who she is. She is no longer "a lesbian" she is an uninterested girl.

Now fair enough that should stop most people, and the fact that it doesn't is basically all down to the guy in question. BUT again, what is the defence here. "Not interested, I like girls".

Keep in mind that it is pretty common to hear stories about how the guy 'gets the girl in the end', I mean it is probably the most common romance plot in history. Girl doesn't like guy, makes excuses and eventually falls for him.

Guys may not be brought up on romance stories but so help me do they ever get taught that message. It goes right along with never giving up and how a 'real man' sees what he wants and works hard to get it (or in some cases TAKES IT).

So now, instead of 'an uninterested girl', we have 'a girl who can be won over and/or taken' depending how the boy was raised.

Again, not to excuse any behaviour but this is the kind of crap boys get taught, and when you have people trying to prevent things like sex education getting taught in schools, which is intended in part to teach kids about proper relationships it's going to continue.